


Second Realities

by Jackeline Harkness (Jackeline_Harkness)



Series: Second Realities [1]
Category: Grimm (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Freeform - AU, M/M, Novel Length, Season/Series 04, Slash, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2015-06-11
Packaged: 2018-03-07 03:29:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 55,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3159551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackeline_Harkness/pseuds/Jackeline%20Harkness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick chases and guns down a wesen suspect in a double homicide. </p><p>Then, he wakes up to another cool morning in Portland.  It's a weekday, he has to follow up on a case, and everything should be life as usual. Except he's woken up in a strange bed, has to follow up on a case he has heard nothing about, and the case he does know about is completely new to everyone else. Oh, and the person next to him in bed is definitely not who he remembers. In fact, the past two years of his life are, according to everyone, very different from what he remembers about them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Prologue.**

 

“Just stop right there!” Nick shouted as he slowed to a stop, satisfaction and adrenaline making his heart beat faster as he took in the dead end where he had managed to corral the suspect into.

“I didn’t do anything!” the wesen’s eyes emitted a strange, silvery glow, almost like mercury.

“Then you can just stop and answer a few questions.” Nick saw the fear in his strange eyes, mixed with something raw, primal and definitely dangerous.

“You’re a Grimm.”

“I’m a cop.”

The unknown creature laughed.

“That’s a new one. And I thought I had seen them all.” He tensed as if he was getting ready to pounce, and his fingertips started glowing in the same strange, silvery way as his eyes. He raised his hands in front of his face, making some kind of gesture.

And Nick took the shot before the wesen could attack.

The creature fell to the ground, completely limp, and just as Nick knelt down next to him to check for a pulse, the silvery glow died in his eyes and his hands.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1.**

 

Nick woke up slowly, feeling strangely calm and at ease, like he very seldom had the chance to be, especially after he found out about his heritage. The sheets felt soft against his skin, and the body draped over his back was warm and familiar.

He stretched softly, not wanting to open his eyes or wake Juliette up or anything that disrupted the dreamy sensations, savoring the moment for as long as it could last. Except, apparently, he wasn’t as subtle as he’d wanted to, because the familiar figure next to him stirred, pressing up against his back and wrapping warm, loving, strong arms around…

Nick’s eyes shot open to a completely unknown bedroom, his heart hammering against his ribcage as if it wanted to break free from his chest as he elbowed the figure that was decidedly too big to be Juliette’s, at the same time that he half-jumped half-fell out of bed.

He watched, eyes wide with shock, as the other person flailed wildly, emitting a pained groan at the impact from his elbow and a louder one when they fell out of the bed. His mind registered that, one, the groan was definitely male and, two, he was naked.

As fast as he could, he fumbled for his gun, which happened to be neatly set on the night stand next to the bed, and even as he thumbed the safety off and pointed it at the _man_ on the other side of the bed, he quickly scanned the room for his clothes. And that was definitely his jacket draped over the backrest of a chair, but no signs of his pants.

All in all, it had to have taken all of five seconds, tops, but Nick’s brain was spinning at light speed. Only to freeze when the other man got up, gritting out a string of curses in whatever language not English and pressing a hand to his face. Because he knew that man.

Sean Renard.

A naked and pissed off Sean Renard. A very naked Sean Renard.

“What the hell is going on here?”

“That should be my line,” Sean pressed his fingers to his mouth, cursing again –in French, Nick could discern this time– when his fingers came away bloody. “If that’s how you wake up, we have to consider separate beds.”

“What?” Nick managed to get out, still staring at his –very naked– captain.

“And I’d appreciate it if you took your gun out of my face,” he said conversationally as he leaned down to pick up the bedding that had been knocked off the bed. And it really wasn’t the best moment to let his eyes absorb the hypnotic way the Captain’s abdominal muscles flexed as he leaned down… or roam to other places of his anatomy, for that matter, because, although he could admit to himself that he’d always been curious, now was certainly not the right time.

“What?” he repeated like a broken record, though to his credit, he did manage to lower his gun… and reach for a bed sheet to half wrap around his body.

The captain extracted a handkerchief from the night table’s drawer and pressed it to his split lip. When his eyes went back to Nick, they held a tiny spark of amusement.

“Are you awake?”

“I… think so?” at least, it really felt like he was, despite the bizarre situation he found himself in.

“And I trust you weren’t when you did this, right?” he gestured at his injured lip.

“What happened here, Sir?”

“ _Sir?_ ” Renard said, an elegant brow arching and the corner of his mouth curving in a subtle smile. “Feeling playful, Nick?” And his voice dropped a few notes when he added: “Or should I make that Detective Burkhardt?”

Nick barely caught himself before he could repeat _what_ like a complete idiot, and managed a variable.

“What the hell happened here?”

“I would think the events that took place here to be pretty obvious, judging by the evidence. Do you need to get the tech team down here to dust for fingerprints, detective?”

The Grimm had a hard time not letting his eyes roam the other man’s still naked body. And that fact, simple as it was, made his brain ask other questions. Why was the captain so comfortable sitting there with no clothes on, as if it was the most natural thing in the world? And why were they there? And where were they?

“Why are you…?” he gulped, his throat suddenly dry. “Did we…? I mean, did we do what…? What happened here?”

The captain looked at him, the previous expression vanishing from his face as he studied him.

“Are you asking me if we slept together, Nick?” and his voice was suddenly serious.

“Yes,” he answered, though from the situation, he’d thought it was more than obvious.

“That we did, Nick,” and now his face was more than serious. “Is there a reason you’re asking this?”

The detective didn’t have to ask if he was serious. The dull soreness he hadn’t felt in certain parts of his body since his college days was confirmation enough.

“How did that happen? Where are we? Did Adalind have anything to do with this?” but if anyone asked, the thing that flared in his chest was not panic.

“We’re… home. That was the whole point of this little adventure. And if by _this_ you mean last night, the answer is I don’t think so and I certainly hope she didn’t have anything to do with it. Now, if you’re talking about this little situation we have right here, then the answer is she’s not supposed to… but I wouldn’t put it past her.”

“And you’re so calm. Is this remotely normal for you?”

“Again, depending on what you mean by _this_ , the answer could be yes or no. Are you feeling alright, Nick?” and he started to go around the bed towards Nick. The detective’s phone chose that exact moment to start ringing, and the shorter man stopped him with a raised hand, tossing his gun on the bed while he answered his phone with the other hand.

“Hank? What’s up?”

“Sorry to bother you so early, hope I didn’t interrupt, and all that jazz, but you’ve gotta come down here. The ship we were expecting arrived an hour ago.”

“The ship?”

“Yeah. Got the call about twenty minutes ago, I already ripped these guys a new one for taking so damn long to report it. Anyway, the techs already opened the cargo bay and guess what we found under the fish?”

“A body?”

“As good as. The jewelry. Looks like Simons was telling the truth after all.”

“Huh. Good,” he blurted out, because he had absolutely no idea what Hank was talking about. “The docks, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“See ya, then.”

He hung up and stared at his phone, because it was a much better alternative than staring at Renard, who was still standing naked a few steps away from him.

“It was Hank,” he said after what felt like too long a pause.

“And I’m guessing they have the ship under custody.”

This time, his eyes shot quickly towards Renard, a little shocked that he seemed to know exactly what was going on. Had he blacked out and lost a chunk of his life?

“What day is today?”

“Tuesday.” He said. Then, when Nick just kept staring at him, he specified: “February the third?”

So he hadn’t lost even a day, since he was pretty sure it’d been Monday the second when he’d been chasing his main suspect in a double homicide case. Things weren’t making any sense, but he was pretty sure they weren’t going to just sort themselves out if he stayed there, staring wide-eyed like a total moron. Moving seemed like the best idea at the moment. Maybe Hank would offer him a new perspective.

“I have to go check it out.”

“As a matter of fact, we should go.” He paused, still looking way too serious. “After a shower.”

“Right.” Nick looked around him, again looking for his clothes. “Where are my clothes?”

“In the closet. Or the drawers,” the captain nodded towards the piece of furniture, “depending on which type.”

“Right.” He walked towards the closet, feeling his stomach twist in knots as he took in his own and very familiar clothes neatly organized inside the mahogany closet, right beside what must have been Renard’s clothes. He took a long time choosing a pair of pants from the closet, only half his brain on the task while the rest of him battled between panic and trying to push panic down out of sheer force of will. It was one thing to think that he’d somehow ended up in bed with his boss and, for better or worse, forgotten the whole thing. His clothes in what he was beginning to realize had to be Renard’s house hinted at much more than that. Feeling the other man’s heavy gaze on him, he managed to walk towards the drawers and find the rest of his clothes. “I’ll… take a shower.” And he did his best not to run into the half open door that obviously opened into a bathroom.

Once there, he dumped his clean clothes on the immaculate floor and leaned over the toilet, dry-retching for what felt like forever. What the hell was going on? Where was Juliette? Had something happened to her? Or was this affecting only him? Was anything he was seeing real at all? Nothing felt like a dream, so the explanation could only be of the bizarre and unnatural kind. Whatever was happening, he could only try to keep his composure and find out what it was and how to fix it.

That decided, he showered as fast as he could with cold water, then got dressed, only then realizing he’d brought the bed sheet into the bathroom with him. Feeling strangely awkward, he picked it up as he steeled himself to step back out into the bedroom…

Where Renard was already showered and neatly dressed, finishing the knot on his wine-colored necktie.

His steps were tentative as he approached to toss the sheet onto the bed, feeling strangely more awkward now than he’d felt when they’d been both naked.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” he lied, automatically, tensing badly when Renard covered the distance between them in a few long strides, leaning into his personal space and inhaling deeply. He didn’t catch even a glimpse of the zauberbiest, since he was leaning in so close, but the way Renard moved suggested he’d woged as he sniffed at him.

“You don’t smell sick or anything of the sort. And you look fine, if a little disoriented. But something is definitely not right. Do you need to take the day off?” He also didn’t perceive any traces of magic on him, but he didn’t feel the need to elaborate.

“I’m… I’m fine,” he insisted, taking a step back as he tried not to let his mind run and cause him to panic again. He regretted it a bit when the distance made it impossible for him to keep avoiding the captain’s eyes.

“Tell me what is wrong.”

“Nothing I can…” Renard’s green eyes hardened instantly, making him interrupt himself.

Their gazes seemed to be locked for full minutes.

“What did we have for dinner last night?”

Nick couldn’t answer. Not if his life had depended on it.

“So you don’t remember,” Renard said, not asking at all.

“I don’t, but that doesn’t mean something else is wrong. I just…”

This time, it was Renard’s phone. His tone was professional as he talked to some officer or another, but his gaze never stopped pinning Nick into place.

“We have to get moving,” he said after he hung up, grabbing his coat on his way to the door. “We can get coffee on the way.”

Nick followed, not having great problems to find his own things in the unfamiliar space, and grateful for the temporary reprieve. They made it to the parking space and into Renard’s car before his captain decided he’d given him enough quiet time. His car had been there, too, but since the captain made it obvious that he expected him to go with him, he just followed. The way his mind was reeling, he might cause an accident if he got behind the wheel, anyway.

“Nick, you have to tell me what is going on. You know I don’t like to push you, but I have to know if I’m ever be going to be able to help.” He paused, his eyes never leaving the road. “You don’t remember last night,” and it wasn’t a question. “So I have to ask what the last thing you remember is.”

“I remember last night. You know, Monday, February the second of two thousand fifteen. But what I remember doesn’t make any sense right now. Not with the things that are obviously happening.”

Sean shot him a quick glance, intense with worry.

“What do you remember doing last night?”

“I was following a suspect. Andrea Cafaro, our main suspect in the double homicide of the twins back in Hillsdale. He was wesen, though of a kind I’ve never seen before. There was this light on his hands, and he was about to attack me, so I shot him. I was about to make sure he was dead, and then I woke up…” he interrupted himself, not wanting to describe the exact situation he’d found himself in that morning. “And you know that part, you were there.”

The silence sat heavy between them despite the noises of traffic and city life.

“I’m guessing that’s not exactly what you remember.”

“It is not, as a matter of fact.”

The service at their usual drive-thru café was as efficient as ever, but it felt different for Nick this time. Not just because as far as he remembered it was usually Hank beside him, but because it felt too slow when he had to wait to ask more questions until they got their coffee, and too fast when Renard didn’t ask what he wanted but knew his choice by heart.

“Andrea Cafaro, you said.”

“Right.”

“I’ve never heard that name before. And there’s no open case involving any twins.”

“It happened last Thursday evening, Sarah and Monica Philips. They were found and reported by their older cousin, who was supposed to pick them up for a party.”

“I’m not saying I don’t believe you, Nick. But I’m telling you, this is the first thing I hear about it.”

“Just as I don’t have the slightest idea about any recent cases involving any ships.”

“And that’s a case that’s been ongoing for almost two weeks. You and Hank have been investigating it,” he paused, seemed to ponder something for a few seconds and steel himself as he made a decision. “Which is the reason you hadn’t been able to finish properly moving in until yesterday.”

“Moving into your house. With you.”

“ _Our_ house, as of now, but yes.” He frowned. “I’m guessing you don’t remember that, either.”

Nick felt his heart beat faster and harder.

“No offense or anything, but… I don’t remember why I’d be doing that, either.” There was no answer to that, but Nick could see Renard’s knuckles turn white where they grasped the wheel. “Last thing I remember, I was with Juliette.”

Even as the captain’s eyes remained fixed on the road, Nick could see something thunderous flash through them.

“Nick, you haven’t been with Juliette for two years.”

“What?” And this time, he didn’t have enough presence of mind to berate himself for the dumb question.

Renard didn’t say anything, but in his usually serene green eyes, Nick could read how critical it was that he didn’t remember that either. Had he lost two entire years of his life, then?

The cold, logical part of Nick’s mind, the one that kept his eyes sharp and his breakfast in place at the most gruesome murder scenes, suggested he should be grateful for that, since it meant he hadn’t been unfaithful to Juliette. The rest of him was a bit sick at the thought, and that was not considering the fact that he was apparently in a relationship with his boss. Did anyone know about it? Renard was a wild card, with way too many sides for Nick to really trust him. One thing he did know for certain was that Renard wanted him on his side, whatever that was… so he wasn’t going to just rule out the possibility that this whole thing was his doing. He needed confirmation on that, too.

That thought served to gain some control over the chaos that was his head at the moment. He refused to acknowledge the whirlwind of emotions, because that might prove impossible to handle.

“We must take care of this. And continue this talk later,” he said as he unbuckled his seatbelt, green eyes scanning the busy scene. It was then that Nick realized they’d arrived at the docks while he was lost in thought. “Even if you’re unfamiliar with the current investigation, I trust you’re smart enough to get by. We don’t know how this happened or who’s responsible, and until we can figure it out, it’d be better not to give anything away.”

It made sense to pretend that nothing was amiss until they had any information, and it also served as an excuse to watch Renard as well.

He nodded and, taking a last gulp from his coffee, got out of the car and approached the scene.

 

 


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2.**

 

“There you are!” greeted Hank, standing by as a crew unloaded a few containers from the ship.

“Hey. What have we got here?”

“Not much, aside from what I told you over the phone. Simons was apparently telling the truth. The stolen goods were in there, hidden in the cargo area.”

“Uh huh.” He nervously watched as the men worked. It shouldn’t be that hard to pretend he knew exactly what Hank was talking about, but he found he couldn’t force his mind to stay focused. Had he fallen victim to a new spell or potion? Was absolutely everything he remembered from the last two years a fantasy concocted by someone else? Until now, it seemed that Captain Renard was the one with the right memories, but he still wanted confirmation. The first thing he had to do, though, was remain calm in order to conduct his own investigation. He had a lot of resources, so figuring things out shouldn’t be that hard, right?

“Hey, are you alright, man?” Hank’s voice brought him out of his trance.

“What?” and his mind distantly mocked him, since that seemed to be becoming the word of the day. “Sorry, I was a little distracted. Come again?”

Hank gave him a look.

“I don’t wanna know the details, but I have to guess it was _that_ good?”

Nick had to bite his tongue for a moment to prevent another _what_ from coming out. Hank knew about this thing he apparently had with their captain? He grasped at whatever he could to just get through the situation.

“You sure you don’t want to know?”

“Damn sure.”

“You asked.”

“Whatever it is you and the captain do behind closed doors is nothing I ever wanna hear about,” he said, but then he grinned at Nick. “But it has to be quite something to make you look that dazed even after coffee.”

He shook his head. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know about it, either.

“Say anything again and I’ll tell you.”

“Alright, alright,” he said with a chuckle, hands raised in surrender.

“You’re in a good mood, today.”

“Well, yeah. Not for the same reason as you, mind you,” and he just grinned at him when Nick shot him a look. “But I actually miss good old crime, with humans murdering humans over stolen jewelry,” he nodded towards the container they were unloading, boxes and boxes of expensive jewelry half buried beneath pounds of frozen fish. “That doesn’t sound good, does it?”

“Not at all. But I can’t say I disagree,” and a friendly slap to Hank’s shoulder before he took off after the techs, approaching the stolen cargo. With that, he felt the tension melt away from his bones, and the day rolled on easily.

Dealing with the scene was much faster than any of them could have anticipated, since the evidence was blatant and the case was as good as closed. Except, of course, for the paperwork, which was an inescapable part of their jobs. Some days, it made him wonder if all the adrenaline they got in the field could ever balance the terrible boredom of endless form-filling so that their jobs could actually be classified as exciting.

At some point during the day, Renard had casually walked by his desk and said, calm as ever and not making a single ripple in the every-day atmosphere:

“We need to talk.”

Just like that, all the ease Nick had slowly slipped into vanished. His report finished, he pretended along with Hank to keep working, until he saw the captain get absorbed in an obviously important phone call. And then, he made his escape.

“Can you hand in my report?”

Hank gave him a questioning look. It wasn’t an uncommon request at all, so Nick guessed from his partner’s reaction that something must have given him away.

“There’s… something I need to do,” he elaborated.

“Uh huh,” Hank nodded, but glanced at Renard’s office.

“I’ll see you later.”

Nick exited the precinct trying his damnedest not to look like he was fleeing, and it was only when he was in the parking lot that he remembered he hadn’t brought his car. Annoyed beyond belief, he took a taxi back to Renard’s – _their_ , Renard had insisted– house and, feeling like a thief in what was supposed to now be his home, retrieved his keys.

His phone started ringing.

He looked at the screen, saw it was Renard, and proceeded to ignore the call. The phone didn’t stop ringing, but he decided that, if it was something important and work-related, Hank would call him.

Feeling paranoid, he took an alternative route to the spice shop.

 “Nick!” Rosalee greeted from behind the counter where she was putting away a freshly refilled jar. Boxes, bags and packages of various sizes littered almost all surfaces. The fuchsbau made a face. “Sorry about the mess. We got this shipping last night and it was already late, so we didn’t get to organize it until today.”

“No problem.”

“Monroe is in the back, getting a few boxes sorted out,” she opened a can full of what looked like dried flowers, sniffed at them and smiled, letting out a small pleased sound. “Was there anything we could help you with?”

“Actually, yes.”

Monroe came into the front room carrying two very similar jars.

“Rosalee, is there really a difference between sliced grul root and chopped grul root?”

“Strange as it is, yes, there’s a difference. Not so much in the ingredient itself as on its uses, but you know.”

“I see,” the blutbad finally lifted his eyes off the jars. “Oh, Nick, hey!”

“Hi. You’re busy, I see.”

“No, it’s alright. What’s going on?”

“That’s actually what I’m trying to find out.”

“Who died?”

Rosalee smiled, clearing her throat to interrupt her husband’s perhaps too eager interest in Nick’s murder cases. Monroe turned towards her, and she arched her brows at him.

“Oh. Right! Uh… So, how’s life? You know, life… being not-quite-married-to-a-half-royal-half-zauberbiest?"

“So you know about that,” Nick said, his hopes quickly dissolving into nothing.

Both wesens shot him identical confused looks.

“Of course we know. Is there a reason we should not-know?”

“Ok. Uh… I think there’s a lot to explain, because I really need your help, guys.”

“Why? What happened?” said Rosalee with a worried expression as she went to turn the sign on the door to closed.

“Like I said, that’s exactly what I’m trying to figure out.”

“Well, what’s wrong?”

“Could be everything, could be me. I’m not sure. Hey, do you remember when I broke up with Juliette?”

Both Monroe and Rosalee looked surprised at the question.

“Yeah. Things got really strange, I don’t think anyone can ever forget about it.”

“When did that happen? How did that happen?”

“Well, Adalind put her into a comma and then she woke up but she couldn’t remember you, so you moved out, and then things happened. But you know all that, right?” Rosalee was looking at him with true concern in her eyes.

“I’m not sure of what I know. I… Juliette and I, we got together again, afterwards? Did she ever remember me?”

 “Oh, she remembers you alright,” the blutbad commented. “But by the time her memories came back and things went back to normal, you were both… you know… doing something and someone else.”

“So we never got back together…”

“Dude, are you having a relapse? Because, believe me, if you are, we all need to be prepared. It was bad enough having a moping Grimm around the first time.”

“Does this have anything to do with Sean?” Rosalee asked. “You sounded just fine yesterday. Did you guys get into a fight or something?”

It took Nick’s brain a few moments to realize that by _Sean_ , Rosalee meant _captain_ _Renard_. Of course, if they were a couple, they wouldn’t be on formal-names terms, so it was obvious his friends knew him by his first name too.

“You know, that’s the thing. I woke up this morning in bed with him…”

Monroe scrunched his nose.

“Thanks for the lovely mental image.”

Nick decided to ignore him because, if he had to live with the vivid memory of his naked boss burned in his mind’s eye, then the blutbad could handle the mental picture.

“But I can’t remember being with him. I have perfect memories of what happened yesterday, except apparently nothing of what I remember happened, because what I remember certainly didn’t include sleeping with him.”

“Well, I’m not sure what happened or what you were doing that you don’t remember certain things, but you do smell like you did sleep with him. If _sleep_ is what you wanna call it.”

Nick gaped at him.

“Can’t fool the nose, bro.”

“For all I remember, I was still with Juliette.”

“Are you suffering amnesia?” inquired the fuchsbau.

“Not unless you tell me today isn’t February the third of two thousand fifteen.”

“That’s today.”

“Then no, I don’t think I’m suffering amnesia. I just have all these memories of something completely different happening since back when Juliette couldn’t remember me.”

“You just don’t remember Sean,” Rosalee suggested.

“No, I do remember him.” And how strange was it that his friends referred to his captain by his first name? “I remember fighting him, working with him… but nothing that even resembles… dating him.”

An exasperated knock sounded at the door. After just a couple of seconds, the knock came again, insistent and obviously out of patience. This time, Monroe went to open it.

“Hey, what do you know? Pronouns seem to work as well for that say-my-name-thrice-to-summon-me thing,” he said as he stepped aside to let in none other than Sean Renard himself, who entered the shop with long strides.

“You weren’t answering your phone,” he accused Nick.

“I was busy.”

“Doing that after what happened this morning, do you have any idea…?” he interrupted himself, obviously bothered by the fact that he was losing his cool. “I was worried,” he said, once again in control.

“Hi, Sean,” Rosalee said in an effort to disperse the tension in the room. And wasn’t it awkward to feel like an intruder in your own shop?

“Hey,” Monroe followed.

“Good afternoon,” came Sean’s polite reply before his eyes came back to Nick. “I am guessing you still don’t remember.”

The detective opened his mouth to answer, but was interrupted by his wesen friends.

“Do you know what’s wrong with him?”

“When did this happen?”

“I don’t know, and it started this morning,” Sean answered. “He woke up and his memory was not gone, but definitely changed. Have you had any hexenbiester making any suspicious purchases lately?”

“Just the one hexenbiest, but no weird purchases. She was actually buying tea and hibiscus oil. Completely harmless. Why? Do you suspect another zaubertranke?”

“Nothing is completely harmless in the hands of a hexenbiest.”

“Well, you would know,” commented Monroe.

Sean just spared him a glance, then continued.

“I’m not sure what caused this. It doesn’t sound like anything I know, but… there’s a lot of hexenbiest magic I’m not familiar with. And all too many different kinds of magic.”

“He doesn’t smell any different,” said Monroe as he stepped closer to the detective and sniffed a bit.

“Nor like any herbs,” added Rosalee doing the same. “Though any scent would have faded by now if it isn’t recent.”

Sean shook his head.

“There’s been nothing different that I could detect. Save for his memories this morning.”

“If it’s a spell it might not have left any traces, except for the effect.”

“We were together since Sunday evening, so whatever it was, it had to be before that.”

Rosalee nodded, a frown on her face. She didn’t want to say anything too soon, but if it wasn’t something that had had an immediate effect, then it could have been placed any time before that day. Including the day from where Nick’s memories seemed to have been twisted… over two years ago.

Seeing nothing could be done there, Sean left, taking a reluctant Nick with him back to their place.

“Are you thinking zaubertranke?” Monroe asked.

“We can’t be sure, but I don’t think so. I fear it might be something that was given or placed on Nick a long time ago,” the fuchsbau said, worried she might be right. “That could explain why Nick’s memory is changed from so long ago.”

“So the effect would have been dormant for a long time.”

“If we can’t figure that out, there might be nothing we can do to help.”

“Unless he was given something yesterday and the effect was immediate,” Monroe said, because that was also a possibility, and one that gave them more hope than what his wife had suggested.

“Maybe because he moved in with Sean?”

“The local Grimm and the local royal moving in together is the kind of news that would spread fast.”

“Whatever this is, we can’t just let it sit.”

“Time to hit the books.”

“Yup.”


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3.**

 

“You didn’t need to tail me,” Nick protested as they both got out of their cars.

“After the kind of day we’ve had, I think I did.”

“I’m not a child and you don’t own me.”

“And nobody is saying the opposite. But the fact is that something has definitely happened to you, and we have no idea of what it is. So I think I’m entitled to be worried about you.”

“I’m sure you understand how strange this is for me. And that I need some time alone to clear my head,” he said, though the way Renard’s eyes darkened told him he understood perfectly that he really meant some time away from him. He didn’t remember the captain’s face ever being so expressive before.

“We have a lot of things to talk about, and I think we should do it inside.”

Nick complied, but only because doing otherwise would’ve been childish; and if the world was actually right and he was the one affected, which logic dictated was most likely, then being unreasonable was the worst he could do. Plus, being objective, it made sense to sort things out with Renard sooner rather than earlier, seeing how they were supposed to be living together. He had to wonder if Monroe would still be willing to lend him his spare room for a while, in case it was necessary.

He was grateful when Renard went to take a seat in the living room after leaving his coat on the hanger by the door, and showed no signs of wanting to go anywhere near the bedroom. Which was a subject that needed to be breached, and soon, but Nick was more than happy to play the coward for now and just postpone it for a little bit. He sat on the armchair, since it wasn’t far enough to make him appear wary or nervous, but at the same time wasn’t too close and it certainly didn’t allow for Renard to even try to go and sit beside him.

“I stopped signing things today when I realized I couldn’t remember a single thing I’d read. I couldn’t think of any other thing all day, except about you and what is happening.”

Nick didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t used to that kind of open worry and care from another man, much less the man he was used to seeing as his boss and somewhat uncertain ally. So he just nodded, keeping his eyes on the beautiful coffee table.

“You spend a lot of time saying I shouldn’t worry about you so much, that you can take care of yourself… and you’re right. At least most of the time. And you know that your being a Grimm makes you a target. But being with me doesn’t exactly make you safer, all the opposite. And after thinking about this all day long, I think it’s very likely that this is because of me. So you’ll have to allow me to feel responsible for you, at least to some degree.”

“Listen…” and then he wasn’t really sure how to continue. Everyone else seemed to know that he was involved with Renard, so he didn’t think he had anything to do with what was happening to him. Seeing concern clearly show on the captain’s face didn’t exactly make things easier.  “I know it’s… not what you want to hear, but I can’t remember… this,” he said, a gesture of his hand encompassing the house and both of them. “Like I said earlier, as far as I remember, I was still with Juliette. I remember being with her, working out the problems we had after Adalind’s spell, you helping us with that, me moving in with Monroe and later back with Juliette when she finally learned the truth about the whole Grimm thing. Hell, not so long ago, Trubel was staying with us. With me and Juliette, I mean.”

Renard regarded him with a strange expression on his face, but didn’t say anything.

“I feel like I should call Juliette and make sure she’s alright.”

“She was just fine yesterday.”

“Yesterday?”

“Yes, she… dropped by to bring us a bottle of wine, after she called and you told her we were finally unpacking your things.”

“So she knows that we’re… about this.”

“Of course she knows. She was too directly involved in things, and then you were pretty much her teacher in all wesen-related things. You’re pretty close friends. You’ve said your relationship is actually better now that she knows everything and…” he hesitated just a bit, choosing his words carefully. “And now that you’re not so… close, anymore, and she’s not in such a direct danger, she’s repeatedly said that she’s very happy that you allow her to help whenever she can.”

“I don’t remember that. Can you… tell me what happened? The things I don’t remember?”

“Well… that’s over two years of events. But for brevity’s sake, I’ll just tell you the most relevant things: after we dissolved Adalind’s spell, which, believe me, was a great inconvenience for all of us, you helped Juliette with her missing memories. She remembered the night you told her about your heritage and your abilities as a Grimm… so you and your friends told her everything. At that time, you were living with Monroe; but after it was evident that you weren’t going to get back together with Juliette, and Monroe needed his privacy, you moved to your own apartment. There’s where Theresa was staying for a while, with you.”

“So I’ve been living on an apartment of my own.”

“Yes. Until a week and a half ago, when we moved your things here.”

“I thought you’d said I moved in yesterday.”

“We finished yesterday. Work and the matter with the two Verrat hundjagern got in the way, so we hadn’t had time to get you unpacked. You’ve been taking your clothes directly from the boxes until yesterday.”

Nick nodded again. He needed to know exactly how he’d ended up in a relationship with Renard, especially since it was apparently serious enough that they’d decided to live together; but he was afraid to ask.

“Maybe we should go over everything concerning the Verrat agents again. Maybe we should look for any suspicious wounds on you. Even a scratch or anything that could’ve been used to dose you with something,” he leaned forward, getting closer to Nick as much as was possible while they were sitting on different pieces of furniture. “I already contacted a few people in Europe. If anyone ordered this hit on you, we’ll find out. And we’ll make them pay.”

“I assume the two hundjagers are dead.”

“Hundjagern,” Renard corrected so naturally that it had to be a common thing. “And yes. Maybe we shouldn’t be so quick to dispose of threats from now on.”

“You’re talking about keeping prisoners. And torturing them.”

“I know you don’t like it. But for something like this, I can live with your disapproval.”

Nick shuddered, almost imperceptibly. He had the feeling this wasn’t exactly a new topic of discussion between them.

“Our alliance has always made some people very nervous. The progress in our relationship wouldn’t exactly have put their worries to rest. I can think of a few people that would think our living together a very valid reason to spring into bolder action.”

And there it was, the matter of their supposed relationship. The Grimm took a deep breath, steeling himself for what was coming.

“About that…”

Renard looked at him, the perfect image of politely restrained curiosity that almost bordered in anxiety. Once again Nick thought the Sean Renard he knew didn’t have such an expressive face.

He cleared his throat.

“Like I said, I don’t remember it. Any of it. Of our… the relationship, that is,” and his eyes kept finding the expensive coffee table extremely fascinating, even as he felt Renard’s eyes burning a hole through his face.

“That, too, we will figure out,” and his voice made it crystal clear that he’d make sure the offense was washed with blood. And plenty of it.

“And it might be unfair, but… I don’t think I wanna be sharing living space right now,” he paused, just an instant, and then hurried to explain. “That might change, of course. Maybe quite soon, if we can figure this out fast.” He couldn’t help but to think back to when Juliette had forgotten all about him, how he’d felt about the woman he loved seeing him as a total stranger. He could easily sympathize with Renard… but that didn’t make dealing with the situation any easier.

“Nick,” and the hand that came to rest on the Grimm’s arm didn’t make him flinch. It didn’t feel unwelcome as it stayed where it was, either. Renard didn’t break that tenuous contact as Nick finally looked at him. “You know we didn’t decided to move in together just to save on living expenses.”

The detective nodded, trying to keep his expression neutral, thankful for the light-hearted turn of phrase.

“Regardless of the more… personal details you don’t remember right now, the fact is we both live dangerous lives. We’ve agreed that we can watch each other’s backs, and the likelihood of any of us dying should be lower when we’re together.”

Nick nodded again, grateful that the captain’s argument so far wasn’t exactly of a romantic nature.

“In addition, if this was done as an attempt to break us apart, it would work to our advantage to pretend the attempt failed. Whoever is responsible is likely to try again, and when that happens, we will be ready.”

“I mean no offense at all, but…” Nick’s eyes fled the captain’s once again as the detective felt his face heat up just a little. “There’s no easy way to say it, so I’ll just say it. I don’t… I can’t sleep in the same bed as you.”

The silence that followed had an almost physical weight.

Finally, Renard cleared his throat and said, in that perfectly controlled way that meant he was making a conscious effort to keep his cool:

“That is… reasonable,” he paused. “We don’t have to share a bed for you to stay here.”

“I don’t…” he managed through the lump in his throat.

“Maybe you don’t remember that, either, but we have a fully furnished spare room that I can take. You don’t have to worry about anyone having to sleep in the couch.”

“Oh,” he said, thinking to himself that it might not be too different from the time he was living at Monroe’s. “Maybe I should take the spare room. I mean, this is your house, isn’t it?”

“It’s not supposed to be just mine anymore.”

“But it was your place first. And I don’t remember it from before, so there’s no need for you to change things.” He felt himself be studied by intelligent green eyes for a good while.

“I’ll agree to it on one condition.”

Nick tensed. He didn’t think it likely, but he feared Renard might ask something of him that he didn’t feel capable of giving or doing in the present circumstances.

“Call me Sean.”

The detective looked at him, feeling so relieved he actually had a hard time not asking if that was it. If they were going to be playing roommates, it was a more than reasonable request.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you’ve been avoiding calling me anything after this morning. Calling me _you_ will get unpractical after a while, and I don’t want you calling me anything formal in… this house,” the hesitation had been barely perceptible, but it had been there, just enough to let Nick know that he’d been about to say _our house._

“Alright. I can do that. Sean.”

A long silence followed, filled with the questions neither wanted to ask, but not as tense as the brief pauses from before. Finally, Renard stood up, stretching in a way that made Nick wonder how a man that big managed to move so gracefully.

“We should get you settled, then. It’s been a long day, and we won’t get any answers here, anyway.”

Nick made a noise of assent, then followed him to the master bedroom.

He’d feared that stepping into that space with Renard ­– _Sean_ , he reminded himself– would be awkward, especially after what had happened that morning, but it was easier than he’d expected. They fell into an almost professional demeanor as they agreed that Nick could just take some clothes to the spare room, and get other things as he needed them, so they weren’t relocating things until dawn.

“Sean,” he forced the name out of his lips as they both stood at the door of the spare room. “What exactly happened yesterday? I mean, this all looks like whatever it was, had to be yesterday, right?”

“It does look like it. But I can’t see how it could have been.”

“Why?”

“I’ve been thinking the same thing all day. We got up early, started unpacking, then had breakfast, then continued the unpacking. Juliette came by and didn’t stay longer than a few minutes. Then we finished unpacking, showered, ordered Thai take out from the usual place, ate in the kitchen…” he paused, making Nick wonder why his expression looked almost pained. “Then we went to bed early… and made love for hours.”

“Oh,” he said, unable to keep looking at his face while his green eyes were full of something too close to grief for comfort.

“An elbow to the face and your memory gone wasn’t exactly what I had in mind after last night,” and if he was trying for levity, it was a complete failure.

“I’m sorry,” Nick said, because he was, and not only because of the decidedly awkward morning. He missed Juliette and was confused and, he could admit, a little afraid, with what felt like a completely strange life. But he also knew too well how Renard felt, so he couldn’t help but to feel for him.

“Me too. But not as much as whoever did this will be when we find them,” he said with finality before giving Nick a light pat to the arm. Maybe it was what contact he felt he could get away with without making things awkward. “Good night, Nick.”

“Good night,” and then he remembered, “Sean.”


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4.**

 

Unlike the day before, Nick woke up fully aware of where he was and why there was no one by his side in bed. He took a deep breath and just stared at the ceiling for a while, trying to keep a clear mind as he thought things over and over.

He needed to see Juliette, to make sure she was alright and see if she knew anything about what was happening. But that part also scared him. A lot, if he was honest with himself. So far, everyone he’d talked to had confirmed that he was the one with the wrong memories, but getting that confirmation from Juliette… well, it was different. It was one thing to hear it from Renard, Monroe, Rosalee and even Hank; but hearing it from Juliette, the woman he loved, would be… different. Final, perhaps. That fear was the main reason he’d gone to the spice shop the day before instead of running directly towards her. He hadn’t wanted to learn that she was seeing someone else. Maybe even living with someone else.

The thing with Renard baffled him, too. Despite his tastes generally leaning more heavily towards women, he’d played around some during his younger days, and was very much capable of appreciating men that way; it wasn’t impossible to think that he might go after another man again, but… Objectively, he knew Sean Renard was smart, classy, powerful and certainly not unhandsome. From what he remembered, they were allies, and perhaps starting an uneasy friendship, born of bizarre battles fought together, but he couldn’t even begin to think how they could’ve gotten closer like that, he didn’t trust him enough. Not after the captain had played him like a bishop in his intricate real-world chess game.

Then, an idea occurred to him, and it didn’t exactly put him at ease. What if, for some odd balancing reason, now it was him who had been playing Renard? He shuddered. He couldn’t see himself getting close to someone, seducing someone, gaining their trust, with ulterior motives. Then again, he couldn’t see himself falling in love with the captain to the point where he’d agree to move in with him, either.

A look at his cell said he should get moving if he wanted to accomplish anything at all that day, and since he was determined to talk to Juliette and at least start investigating what the hell was happening to him, he forced himself to peel the blankets off and get into the shower.

When he emerged from the room –he was still having trouble thinking of it as his room, just like he didn’t yet manage to feel like that house was home–, the mouthwatering scent of coffee and breakfast led him directly to the kitchen, where Renard was generously spreading cream cheese onto toasted bagel slices.

“Good morning, Nick.”

“Good morning,” he replied automatically, not sure if he was supposed to go and help or something.

“Breakfast is ready. I was about to go and call you,” he said as he started moving plates and mugs to the kitchen island.

The picture was a little strange for Nick. Of course, it was only logical that Renard did things that everyone else did in their daily life, but it was still a bit shocking to see him do mundane things like serve scrambled eggs on a plate or wipe the counter with a rag. The Grimm forced himself to stop staring and perched himself on a stool by the island, in front of a plate of scrambled eggs with mushrooms and thick slices of ham covered in some kind of glistening sauce.

Renard took another stool, and reached for the coffee mug closer to Nick, switching it for the one next to his own plate. Nick didn’t need him to say anything to understand that he knew nothing had changed from the day before.

“Did you sleep well?” the captain asked.

“Yeah, I think so. I mean, considering.”

Renard nodded.

“You?” inquired Nick.

“Not at all, but I expected that.”

“Sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize, Nick. I know this isn’t something you’d do to yourself, and it’s hardly your fault if anyone decided to do something to you.”

Nick didn’t know what to say to that, so he just stuffed his mouth with food. And then, he stopped, chewing slowly as he decided that enjoying those flavors wasn’t so much a whim as a true need.

“I didn’t know you cooked,” he said when he swallowed the first forkful. The coffee was hot, but not too much, with the exact amount of sugar and cream he liked. He felt slightly guilty that he had no idea how Renard liked his coffee.

The expression on Renard’s face could have been called a smile, just barely, but it held no happiness at all.

“You said that. A long time ago,” he let his green eyes focus on his plate as he cut a piece of ham and took it to his mouth, followed by a bite of bagel. “I think even the tone was the same.”

“Look,” he said after a few more bites of the delicious food, “I’m really sorry this is happening, but I can’t remember what I don’t remember.”

“I know. And I’m not blaming you, Nick. I’m sorry if it made you feel like I was. I’m just… worried. And tired.”

“Alright. Just… try to keep in mind that if I do or say something, it’s not because I want to… you know, make you feel bad or anything.”

Renard nodded again, and Nick caught a quick glimpse of the tired and stressed man beneath the polished surface. Then, it was gone, and the captain looked as fresh and collected as ever.

They finished breakfast in a silence that wasn’t unbearably awkward, and Nick found they somehow moved easily together as they cleared the kitchen.

“I have a meeting with the DA and the mayor, concerning the jewelry case, so I’ll probably be at the precinct around noon,” Renard said as he put on his coat and straightened his jacket.

“See you there, then,” and he managed not to flinch when Renard stepped a bit closer and touched his arm. It wasn’t a pat, even, just a touch and pressure from his fingers too light to be considered a squeeze. And then, the captain was gone, leaving Nick wondering if, in this twisted version of reality, they usually kissed at that moment.

Nick could admit that knowing Renard would be busy and away for the rest of the morning was a relief. He headed down to the precinct and thanked the heavens for the boring paperwork that was all they had to do at the moment.

“Trouble in paradise?” Hank asked teasingly.

“Excuse me?”

“You’ve been frowning all morning, and yesterday you literally fled from him,” the look he gave him was knowing. “I told you, man, marriage, or anything close to it, brings nothing but trouble. Maybe you should be grateful that you’re not wearing rings, at least.”

Nick shot him a look that, by his own estimation, could have curdled milk. Hank just smirked.

“I don’t have anything but good wishes for you. I’m just talking from experience here.”

“I know. And it’s nothing like… you know…” he made a vague gesture with his hand.

“A lovers spat?”

The phrase didn’t exactly feel comfortable when used in context to him and Renard, but Nick managed not to roll his eyes.

“Or anything of the sort,” Nick confirmed.

“But something is definitely happening. So, what is it?”

The Grimm reached a decision at that exact moment.

“Ok. So, something is actually happening. I just don’t know what exactly it is, yet.”

“Oh. Grimm stuff?” Hank asked, leaning closer and lowering his voice. The word was unlikely to mean anything to anyone else in the precinct, but he’d learned the hard way that it always paid to be careful.

“Most likely, yes. But I need to go and do some research.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“It would be more help if you could cover for me. There’s a few things I need to check before jumping to any conclusions. I might be able to tell you more afterwards.”

“Sure. It’s just formats today, anyway.”

“Thanks, man. See you later,” and he didn’t waste a second grabbing his coat and leaving the precinct.

 

***

 

Sean’s phone vibrated in his pocket.

Usually, he’d just ignore it, since he was in the middle of a meeting with two of the most important unimportant people in his life. They were quite capable of giving him a hard time when it came to work, and certainly absorbed his time when he wanted nothing but to be somewhere else, doing something else. Like right then, with most of his mind busy trying to think of any possible explanation for what was happening with Nick.

Nick’s memories being replaced by different ones was a setback in the whole scheme of things, especially if he’d forgotten some of the very important things he’d trusted the Grimm with; but he had to admit to himself that he was more worried on a personal level than on a political one. And not only because this thing was a distraction of possibly lethal consequences, but because… of his feelings. Of all things.

The phone vibrated again, and he pulled it out of his pocket, because as rude as it might seem, it was his personal phone and not the one he used for work. Anything that came on that phone was sure to be related to his identity as a bastard prince, as a wesen, and as a member of the resistance.

He quickly checked the two text messages from one of his underworld contacts, and he felt his heart beat faster.

_Reaper in your city._

_Be careful._

If he’d had problems focusing on the damned meeting before, from that point on it was simply impossible. He let skill and practice get him through the talks, and didn’t give a damn if he had agreed to something that might cause any inconveniences later. Right then, that wasn’t a priority. Nick’s scrambled memory didn’t seem like anything a reaper might do, but at that point he wasn’t willing to let any possibilities escape him.

He dialed Nick’s number as soon as he was out of the meeting room, and tried not to panic as the call went to voice mail, over and over again. He tried to rationalize it, reminded himself that Nick had avoided his calls the day before, and dialed Hank’s number instead.

“Captain?”

“Is Nick at the precinct?” he asked without preamble.

“Uh… no. He was here earlier, but he left almost an hour ago. Said he needed to look into some not-normal things,” his tone making it clear that he meant wesen-related things.

Sean gripped the cell so hard, the small device barely held. A reaper was nothing, he told himself. Nick had taken on two of the bastards at the same time before, and even sent their heads back to their master. Even if he happened to come across the reaper, Nick would most likely come out on top, since there was no evidence that the changes in his memory might have affected his abilities as a Grimm.

“Captain? Is everything alright?”

“Probably,” he said. “Could you try to get a hold on Nick for me, please?”

“Sure,” the detective said, with enough hesitation that Sean could almost see him frown.

“Thanks. Call me back as soon as you contact him,” he cut the call and leaned back against the seat of his car, fingers curling around the wheel until his knuckles became white. He tried Monroe next, but the blutbad hadn’t heard from Nick since the day before.

Swallowing his pride, he called Juliette, just to hear that she hadn’t seen Nick either.

If the Grimm hadn’t gone to any of his friends, there was one place he was likely to be. Sean might have broken a few transit laws on his way to the trailer, but at the moment, a speeding ticket was the last of his cares.

Just getting close enough to have the trailer in sight told him Nick wasn’t there. His car wasn’t anywhere to be seen, and the remote location in the middle of nowhere wasn’t easily reached by foot. Still, he went and tried the door, then opened it and entered the trailer just to find it empty. He’d always found the collection fascinating and, after Nick had gotten over his initial reticence to let him go through the ancient books, he’d spent long hours studying them. This time, however, the place and its volumes held no appeal at all.

He went back to his car and tried Nick’s cell phone again, not giving a second thought to whether he’d locked the trailer back up or not. The call went directly to voice mail this time, and he cursed like he seldom did. He was about to try again when his work phone started ringing. He answered it, but not without annoyance.

“Yes?” he closed his eyes for a moment, barely able to control himself. “I’m on my way.”

He wasn’t usually called to crime scenes, instead being given a report or just kept informed of what was going on with cases. Unless there were special circumstances surrounding a death. And of course, a decapitated body qualified as special circumstances, so he was summoned to the scene. The fact that decapitation was reapers’ signature made his heart race, and the fact that the victim, whose head was missing, was a young Caucasian male, was what made him rush over. This time, he couldn’t even remember how he’d gotten there.

“We won’t know for sure until we get a report from forensics, but the CSU guys think he’s been dead for no more than four hours. The no-head thing makes it difficult to get an ID, and he doesn’t have a wallet or anything on him,” Wu was saying as they approached the body. “Which would normally make us think robbery, but the missing head might mean whoever did this didn’t want us being able to identify the vic.”

Sean made a great effort to keep himself in check as he looked at the body and felt his guts twist. Young, fit, white male. His mind screamed that it couldn’t be Nick, but the more rational part firmly stated that, yes, it could very well be.

“The fact that someone decided to have some kind of piñata party with him makes it look like a hit. Perhaps drug-related.”

 The severe bruising and the cuts all over his naked torso made it hard to know much more about him, but the thing that made the police captain close his hands into tight fists was the carved symbol in the middle of the dead man’s chest: a scythe.

Hank approached him, looking just slightly worried.

“Have you heard from Nick?”

“No, sir. I tried to reach him when they called me in, but it went directly to voice mail.”

He nodded sharply, his face as neutral as always but for his tight jaw.

“That’s… Grimm reapers’ work, isn’t it?” Hank said, remembering all the things he’d read in the trailer and heard from his partner.

“It is.”

“But that’s not… him,” the detective said in a tight voice that didn’t sound anywhere as sure as it wanted to.

Sean didn’t answer, because he didn’t feel capable of saying anything remotely intelligent at the moment.

“They’re running the fingerprints. If he’s in the system, we should get an ID soon.” Even sooner if it was Nick, since all officers’ files were readily available, but Hank didn’t want to say that.

The captain nodded, then inhaled deeply as he took his phone out.

“This is Captain Renard. We need a twenty on Detective Burkhardt, trace his phone,” he ordered as soon as base picked up.


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5.**

 

The relief that Nick felt at seeing Juliette’s car in the driveway was huge. It hadn’t occurred to him until he was a few blocks away that her not being home at that hour of the day wasn’t the only possibility, but also that, with all that had changed, she might not live there anymore. Or maybe they hadn’t lived there at all.

But no, at least in this his luck had held. And that the trailer had been in the same place he remembered moving it to, too, now that he thought about it.

Leaving the few books he’d retrieved from the trailer in the car, he went up to the door and knocked.

Juliette answered the door, radiant as ever, despite the slight dark rings under her eyes. She’d always looked beautiful to him, even when she was tired or not wearing any makeup or had just gotten out of bed. He couldn’t help the smile that stretched his lips at seeing her, and he barely resisted the urge to wrap his arms around her and kissing her.

“What? What is it?” was her greeting.

“What?” he blurted back at her, because, seriously.

“Well, you’re here in the middle of the day, and you look like somebody died. No one died, right?”

A homicide detective could have a lot of different witty answers for that question, but that wasn’t the moment, the place or the circumstances he would have used one of them, so he just said:

“No. At least not that I know of.”

“That’s good, I guess,” and she stepped out of the way to let him in. “Also… Sean just called me a few minutes ago, asking if I had seen you. Is everything alright?”

Nick was grateful for the proximity to the couch, because he really needed to sit down after that. It was the exact confirmation he had expected, but dreaded.

“Ok, that face is definitely not good,” Juliette said, sitting on the same couch, but not too close to him. Her voice was gentle when she continued. “What happened? Did you have a fight with him?”

It was like a stab right to the chest, and for a moment, Nick felt his eyes water.

“He sounded just fine on the phone, so I have to ask, are _you_ alright?” her hand went to rest on his, a gesture of support that at the moment just hurt. “Nick?”

“I’m not sure,” he was finally able to say, and then he couldn’t manage anymore. He just shook his head. How was he supposed to even being to tell her what was happening to him? Was it even a good idea to tell her?

“I’ll get you a glass of water.”

He just nodded, and he was still debating on what to tell her when she put the tall glass of cool water in his hand. He took a long gulp and only then realized how thirsty he’d been. This time, she sat closer to him.

“Earlier, when he called, he asked me to call him back if I heard from you. I’m assuming you don’t want me to, right?”

“Yeah,” and then his brows furrowed as a thought came to his mind, and he pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket and started taking it apart, removing the battery. “I don’t want him using base to track me down,” he answered her questioning look.

“Ok. So… I’m guessing _big_ fight, then.”

And suddenly, he had a good way to stall for a few more moments.

“Everyone seems to jump to the same conclusion. And, you know, I’m having trouble remembering a few things right now, so I have to ask: do we have that kind of problems often? Do we fight a lot?” and if he could stall just a little longer before going into full explanation mode with Juliette, he could deal with the awkwardness of referring to himself and Renard as _us._

“Are you kidding? No. In fact, that might be why everyone’s kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop. You guys rarely disagree with anything, much less have a proper fight. That’s unfair, don’t you think? You make the rest of us mortals look bad,” and she leaned in, resting her shoulder against his.

So that was the kind of relationship he had with Juliette. It felt strangely comfortable, even though he still longed to touch her, to wake up and find the whole thing had been nothing but a weird dream.

“Will you tell me what happened?”

“I think I should,” he said, because, really, he had nothing to lose. He just had to ready himself for it.

“Did the whole living-together thing not go as smoothly as you expected?”

“No, it’s… it’s got nothing to do with Renard—Sean,” he quickly corrected himself. “But something very weird is happening.”

“Weird? Wasn’t that like, normal for the two of you?”

“I guess I should start from the beginning,” he said. And then he told her everything, from the suspect he’d been following and the moment he’d woken up in what felt like a completely different world, to all the things he remembered and that hadn’t apparently happened except for inside his head.

“There must be something that can fix it, right? Maybe an antidote Rosalee can make so you can get your memories back?”

“It’s very possible. I mean, most poisons and potions have their antidotes… but the main problem is that so far, nobody knows what might have caused it. Rosalee and Monroe said they’d do some research, and I’ll do my best, too. Perhaps if I find information about this wesen I was chasing, I might find a cure or something,” he paused. “Right now, this seems like… a dream or something, even though it doesn’t feel like one. It’s just that I see… well, everything, and I don’t know where I’m standing. With things, with people…”

“I’m sure you’ll get your memories back. Just like I did,” she squeezed his hand.

“But even after you did… things never were the same as before.”

“No, not really,” she admitted. “But I think that was more of who we are and what we were doing than anything else.”

“What do you mean?”

“Since your memories are all weird right now, I know you might not remember this. But we even discussed it once. It wasn’t the weirdness or the supernatural stuff or being put under a spell or even being attacked in my own house that kept us apart. It was the secrets. Feeling like I didn’t know you was hard, but I could have gotten to know you all over again. Feeling that I couldn’t trust you was harder. That was what did it.”

“So you’re saying… that you don’t trust me?”

“No, I trust you. Maybe at the bottom of my heart I always did. But I couldn’t handle that you didn’t trust me enough to tell me the whole truth from the start.”

“And that… destroyed your feelings for me.”

“Not so much destroyed as…” she paused, biting her lower lip as she thought how to say what she meant, her eyes lowering to his chest for just a moment. “I loved you, Nick. I still do, in fact; I’m just… not in love with you anymore. That’s not destroying anything.”

“No. I guess it’s not the same,” he said, though it felt like it was, especially when he looked at the framed photo on a side table, of Juliette and some blond guy who he guessed was her current boyfriend.

“Maybe we should…” she was interrupted by her phone. She took it from the table where she’d put it, but didn’t pick up the call. Instead, she looked directly into Nick’s eyes. “It’s Sean.”

Nick took a deep breath.

“He’s gonna ask me again if I’ve seen you. And… well, after what you’ve told me, I think he must be really worried about you. What should I tell him?”

“Just… tell him I’ll call him in a while?”

Juliette picked up.

“Hey, Se—um… Yes, he’s with me right now, actually. What? Yes, he’s alright. Well, I was busy, and… No. Look, I think that’s something you have to ask him. Want me to pass him the phone?” she looked startled for a moment. “Ok. Alright. I’ll let him know,” and then she was hanging up, with a strange expression on her face. “He… said to tell you that he’s glad you’re alive and not to call him, that you should talk in person instead.”

“Did he say anything else?”

“Yeah. That he’ll meet you at home. Soon,” she paused. “And he kind of got mad at me because I didn’t call him when you got here.”

“Well, it’s not like it’s your job to keep track of me or anything.”

“Nick, I know you love him and everything, and I even like him. But, honestly? He sometimes scares the crap out of me. And not just because he’s a hexenbiest.”

“Zauberbiest. You know, male.”

“Right. Anyway, he’s kind of creepy sometimes, with that way he can let you feel how hard he disapproves without his voice actually changing or anything?”

“Yeah, I… guess…” he said, because though he didn’t feel like he knew the captain as well as he was supposed to, that certainly checked with what he did know. “Was he mad?”

“Yup. Like, royally pissed off.”

Nick exhaled deeply and leaned back on the couch.

“What am I supposed to do?” he asked.

“Go back home and talk to him?”

“About what? I don’t remember anything to do with him except for work and the wesen part of things.”

“Then maybe you should talk about that. You once told me you weren’t keeping any secrets anymore, and I think the two of you weren’t keeping anything from each other. So don’t start now.”

There was something close to a plea in her beautiful brown eyes, and he understood what she wasn’t saying, that he shouldn’t let the same thing that had separated them keep him and Sean apart. He understood that she was a friend, and she meant it from the bottom of her heart.

“You’re right.”

He put his phone back together, then, she walked him to the door and, before he left, she hugged him tight and kissed his cheek.

“Let me know when you find out what it is. And call me if I can do anything to help, alright?”

“I will. See you around,” and that friendly farewell was a goodbye in more ways than one.

He kept expecting his cell to ring, after all the missed calls he had, but it stayed silent during the whole drive to the house. He wasn’t sure what was going to happen. Maybe Renard would yell at him, or he’d give him the silent treatment after he’d ignored his calls for the second day while strange things were happening. Maybe he’d explode and remind the captain that he was an adult and owner of his own life, that he wasn’t his boss outside of the precinct. Maybe they wouldn’t say anything at all and just go directly to blows; he knew he was very capable of that in his current emotional state.

He steeled himself as he stood at the door, then entered.

Renard pinned him in place with thunderous green eyes as soon as he stepped in. For a moment, Nick was surprised the glass of wine didn’t shatter between his fingers; instead, the royal bastard leaned forward to gently place it on the coffee table.

 _So, cold fury, is it?_ Nick thought, then, as Renard stood from the armchair and started towards him: _Or maybe we’ll just fight it out._ He fisted his hands and slightly adjusted his stance, readying himself to land the first punch or block the ones thrown his way.

He didn’t expect the collected, sometimes cold captain to step into his personal space and just crumble down on him, arms wrapping tightly around his body and head bowing down to rest on his shoulder.

Nick felt him tremble like a leaf against him, the shuddery breath against his neck too close to a sob. Slowly, he put his arms around the taller man’s torso, and Renard just hugged him more tightly.

“You’re alright,” Renard said after a long time, his voice sounding hoarse against his shoulder, then again, as if he was trying to convince himself. “You’re alright.”

“I’m alright,” Nick confirmed. Then, he felt Renard shift against him, never letting go of him as he pressed a kiss to his jaw, then to his cheek, then to his closed lips. It felt intense against his skin, against his lips, even as he didn’t respond, as he just let himself be held and kissed. Renard never tried to deepen the kiss and, after a while, stepped back, just a little.

“I received a message this morning,” the captain started, pulling Nick towards the living room, “letting me know that a reaper had come to Portland. He got the Grimm he was hunting, and we were called in to a scene with a decapitated body with signs of torture and a scythe carved on his chest. As usual, the reaper took the Grimm’s head, so it wasn’t easy to identify the victim.”

“Oh,” Nick said, and he realized for the first time how tired the captain looked. Renard often had long nights and dealt with a lot of stress, fruit of both sides of his double life, but the detective couldn’t remember ever seeing him that affected.

“I couldn’t order the techs to run the body’s fingerprints against yours first thing. I couldn’t just leave the precinct to go looking for you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“This time you do have reason to apologize.”

“I know. But I needed to do a few things. Like start looking into this… thing that is happening. And talking to Juliette.”

“Well, I hope you accomplished at least the second one,” there was a very slight tension to his shoulders at the mention of Juliette’s name, and Nick wondered for the first time if Renard was jealous of her.

“I did.”

“What about the other thing? Have you made any progress?”

“No, I’m afraid not. I didn’t even get the chance to start on the books… but I did bring some with me.”

“I was worried about you,” Renard said, finally.

“I know. And I’m sorry,” and he remembered Juliette’s words. “I’ll let you know what I’m doing, next time.”

Renard nodded.

“I’ll go get the books. See if we can find out how to get my right memories back,” he said, and went to retrieve the old volumes from the car. When he returned to the living room, he took a seat on the couch instead of the armchair, leaving some space between himself and the captain.

He couldn’t help but to notice that the ancient books looked right in Renard’s long-fingered hands.

It was after a good while that Nick heard the thud of the book falling from the captain’s hands. Renard had leaned down on the couch, not using Nick’s lap as a pillow, but close enough that he could feel the heat from the top of his head radiating onto his thigh, and now, the other man was asleep. Nick picked up the fallen book and put it on the table along with the one he’d been reading.

“Hey,” he called, trying not to startle Renard too badly. “You should go to bed.”

Sleepy green eyes took a look around, as if scanning for any threats, then visibly relaxed as he found none, leaning back down.

“It’s alright.”

“You can’t sleep on the couch,” because, as big as the expensive piece of furniture was, it still wasn’t enough for Renard’s large frame.

“Won’t kill me,” Renard mumbled, closing his eyes and looking more than ready to go back to sleep.

“Come on, Sean,” Nick said, and the name didn’t sound as strange from his lips this time. “Your back’s gonna be killing you tomorrow if you sleep here.”

“Can’t sleep in that bed without you,” he said without opening his eyes.

Nick froze for a moment.

“I can’t,” Nick said. “Not yet,” he added, because though he felt unsure as hell, it sounded better than a definite no.

“Not blaming you.”

And then, Nick went to retrieve a pillow and a couple of blankets for him, because even if Sean wasn’t blaming him for anything, he still felt guilty.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6.**

 

“And, that’s it,” said Hank with a satisfied grin as he pressed the enter key and sent the last reports on what Wu had nicknamed the fish jewelry case.

“Thank god,” Nick agreed. “I don’t think I can stand hearing about fish for a month.”

“At least it’s finally done. Our part, at least. Though the DA should be grateful, we gave her everything on a silver platter with this one. Not even a magician would get those guys off the hook.”

“Let’s hope there are no magicians in the area, then.”

“Feel like grabbing a burger down by 25th?”

“Sure.”

“Talking about magic and other freaky stuff,” Hank said conversationally as he shrugged on his jacket and headed out with Nick. “What did Rosalee say? Has she found anything?”

Nick shook his head. In the aftermath of his temporary disappearing act, he’d told his friend everything, and Hank’s reaction had been to say that as long as it had to do with Nick, nothing really surprised him anymore.

“You’re caught up with work, but… how are things back home?” which was the most polite way Hank could think about to ask how things were with Renard.

“I couldn’t tell you. We’re getting along, I think. Like roommates.”

Hank made a face.

“I don’t know what goes through the Captain’s mind, but if it was me, I wouldn’t be exactly happy with that arrangement.”

“Can’t say I would, either. But right now I’m just happy he’s willing to be patient.”

Lunch was burgers, fries and milkshakes, accompanied by non-stop talk that went from Nick’s current problems to Hank’s ex-wife number three calling him like she maybe wanted to start things with him again, to how the new blend they’d started using at the office was making everyone buy their own coffee before going in. Then, they got a call to a crime scene, and the afternoon got busy.

Spending hours at an old warehouse full of mostly-rusted furniture frames wasn’t Nick’s idea of fun, so he’d been more than happy to leave when sunset made it impossible to continue to search for any leads. The house was empty when he got there, so he went directly to the shower. When he got out, Renard was sitting in the living room, tablet in one hand and a tumbler of whisky in the other.

“Hey.”

“Nick,” he greeted, lowering the tablet to rest it against his knee. “How was the day?”

“Dusty. There’s not much to go on in the case that was reported this afternoon. Honestly, it looks like a simple robbery that went too far. Probably another homeless guy.”

Renard answered with a sound of assent that told Nick that maybe he hadn’t wanted to know about the case, maybe he’d been expecting a more personal answer. Still, it was hard to break the habit of reporting back to the man.

“Had dinner yet?” Nick asked before the silence could get too awkward.

“I was waiting for you.”

“Let’s look for something, then. I’m starving,” and he went into the kitchen.

Sean took the glass, drained it, and followed Nick, watching the other man closely. Basically, he was the same Nicholas Burkhardt that he knew, the same man he’d brought to live with him, but nothing was really the same. Maybe what was happening didn’t even rank too high on the list of strange and bad things that had happened in his life, and he’d told himself that they’d somehow work it out. That was why they were so good as a couple, because they balanced each other out and brought the very best out of each other. He’d told himself that, if the worst case scenario came to happen and Nick never recovered his memory, he could win Nick back, he could make him fall in love with him again. But the fact that they knew each other so well was actually playing against him this time. He knew Nick, but the fact that Nick didn’t know him as a person made them both into strangers. The missing memories made Nick react and act in unpredictable ways sometimes. The reactions he could anticipate didn’t help… all the opposite, they made things worse.

Nick had already taken out various ingredients to make sandwiches and, as he went to put the glass in the sink, he rested a hand on Nick’s shoulder. He’d meant only to give him a half hug when he’d leaned in, just wanting a little contact to help himself get by. Nick must have thought he was going to kiss him, because he retreated as if he’d been burned, making a poor attempt at hiding the pure repulsion he felt towards him.

Sean retreated his hand, some cruel part of his brain reminding him that it had taken Nick a long time to just tolerate the zauberbiest side of him. Of course he’d never find his wesen form attractive, he was way too human for that; but the Nick he loved wasn’t outright disgusted by it, either. Not anymore.

Changing his mind, he took the glass back up and filled it again. Then he took a beer out for Nick.

“Did you talk to Monroe today?”

“Yeah,” Nick answered, setting the plates with their sandwiches on the kitchen island. “Still nothing.”

“I haven’t been able to find anything, either,” and from Nick’s expression, he hadn’t fully managed to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

“There has to be something. I mean, if it exists, then somebody’s bound to know about it. We’ll find it, eventually.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t take too long. With magic and alchemy, the sooner you find an answer, the higher the chances to reverse their effects.”

“Yeah. It’d be nice to remember things the way they really are. I still feel like I’m living at a hotel or something. It’s nice,” he hurried to add, “but it doesn’t exactly feel like home.”

“New places always take a while getting used to.”

“By the way, this place looks pretty new,” he took another big bite off his sandwich as he looked around the kitchen. “You haven’t lived here for long, right? Last thing I knew, you had that fancy penthouse,” and he’d been wondering if the house had been Renard’s before they’d had any plans to move in together, or if the change had something to do with that.

“It is. New, I mean. The apartment you remember was trashed pretty badly, and after I was killed and everything that happened, I wanted a place with better security.”

“Killed?”

“Shot, three times, by that hundjager working for the family,” he left his sandwich on the plate. “You don’t know about that either?”

“Oh, no, that I remember. He was an FBI agent, Trubel cut his head off.”

“Yes.”

“Some details might be different, but I remember that happening,” he took another gulp of his beer. He wondered why good things hadn’t remained the same, and he snorted at how ironic his life was, shaking his head. “I gotta say, though, you look very healthy for a dead guy.”

 Nick knew they had been the wrong words to say as soon as they were out of his mouth. Sean’s face closed off, expression as blank as a mask.

“I guess I really did lose you, didn’t I?” he said and, without waiting for an answer, he stood from the stool and stormed out of the house, barely pausing to grab his keys from the silver bowl near the door, and foregoing a coat.

Sean knew that his finely polished skill to keep his composure had saved his life in numerous occasions, and was grateful for it. At the moment, however, he envied those who could simply let go of themselves, wondering how it’d feel to let out the primal half-scream half-growl he felt stuck in his chest, wondering if there would be satisfaction in grabbing Nick by the shoulders and shaking him until he either remembered things the right way, decided to really put effort in rebuilding his life as it was or snapped and simply punched him in the face.

The way he was, though, he could do no more than get into his car and drive to that bar downtown whose high prices kept on the exclusive side. The scotch felt hot sliding down his throat despite the ice in it, and he welcomed the burn that deliciously mixed with his half-repressed emotions in a dark whirlwind.

He was in his fourth tumbler when he pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed a number he knew by heart.

“Sean?” said the female voice at the other side of the line, as collected as his own, despite the late hour of the night.

“Someone played with Nick’s head,” he said into the phone, in a voice that didn’t sound familiar to his own ears. “I need your help. Please.”

“Of course.”

“Thank you,” and the call ended. Just like that. It was more than enough. He drained the tumbler and gestured to the bartender for a refill.

***

Nick debated on what to do for a long time. He could call Renard, but with the way he’d left, it was unlikely that he’d pick up. It was late, and although he could be shameless about waking people up in the middle of the night when he really needed their help, calling to ask for advice on his personal relationships just didn’t sound right.

He decided to wait and see if Sean would return. Then, when minutes turned into hours, he decided to go and look for him.

It took him a couple of hours, but he finally found the car in a fancy bar’s parking lot. Perhaps one advantage of the late hour was that there weren’t that many places that were still open and where Renard would go by himself.

The captain was sitting at the bar, apparently watching the condensation make patterns on the polished stone surface. He looked as good as always, and he didn’t appear to be drunk, but the almost alarmed look the bartender shot his way when he approached Renard made him wonder how much exactly he’d had to drink.

“Hey.”

Green eyes regarded him for about half a second, slightly dilated pupils the only sign of well-masked intoxication. Then a soft snort, and his attention was again focused on the bar.

“Come on, let’s go home,” Nick said, only to be answered by a discrete but bitter laugh.

“Not that it’s home to you.”

“You know what I mean. Come on,” he put an arm under Sean’s and around his back, but he didn’t try to get him to stand yet. He knew that if he tried to force him to do anything, things would likely degenerate into stumbling blows, probably in some property damage and for sure into a front page story, the captain of the police and a detective having a physical lovers’ spat in some expensive bar on a Friday night.

“What difference does it make? To you?”

Nick studied him for a moment, and for the first time realized that the darkness in the other man’s eyes, muddled by alcohol, wasn’t anger or frustration, but pure heartbreak. And maybe he didn’t have feelings for Renard, not like he did for him, but that didn’t change the fact that he was responsible for it. Maybe he should have been more careful with the way he handled things. But Renard had always been so stoic, so calm… it was hard to know what he was feeling, or how something was affecting him.

“Please, Sean,” he said, and he felt the resistance melt from the taller man’s body. This time, he helped him stand. The captain seemed to have a little difficulty finding his vertical, but afterwards, he didn’t really need the help. Nick kept his arm around him anyway, and returned the bartender’s relieved look with a subtle nod. “You can’t drive like this. We’ll take my car, and we can pick yours up tomorrow.”

Sean just nodded, letting Nick guide him into the passenger’s seat. Then, he just rested his forehead on his fingers and didn’t say a word during the whole drive back to the house, though Nick knew he wasn’t asleep. He wondered if Renard did that often, getting wasted and then driving back home. Save for the scent of alcohol, he looked good enough that he could have fooled him.

He still didn’t say anything when Nick guided him to the master bedroom and half helped him out of his clothes, obviously not knowing if he needed the help at all. He didn’t, actually. It wasn’t the first time he’d drunk until he lost count of the glasses, until the pain and the worry didn’t disappear but felt at least slightly faded, anesthetized by the alcohol. It wasn’t very healthy, or very safe for someone like him, but it was one of the few selfish risks he allowed himself every now and then. Maybe he wouldn’t still be alive if not for those rare nights of catharsis. That he hadn’t needed them since his relationship with Nick had gotten serious was something he didn’t let himself think about.

In silence, he let Nick put him to bed, but he grabbed him by the shirt when he tried to leave.

“Don’t go,” and if his voice was tinted with desperate emotion, it was alright, because he had alcohol to blame for it.

“I… I don’t…”

“Please, Nick. Stay. I miss you. I… need you. So much. You have no idea,” he pleaded, one hand fisted in the cloth, the other mindlessly touching firm abdomen, hipbone, thigh.

The Grimm hesitated, then took Sean’s hands with his own to pull them away from his clothes.

“Ok,” he conceded. “Alright. I won’t go anywhere. Just let me get out of these,” he gestured at himself. He stepped to the other side of the huge bed, undressing down to boxers and t-shirt before lying down on the bed. He had to admit, this bed was much more comfortable, and not only because of its size. The mattress was just the right point between firm and soft, the comforter like a caress against his skin. He wondered if they had chosen those together, or if they were just a result of Sean’s refined tastes.

“Thank you,” and he reached out to grab Nick’s hand and take it to his lips, to press a kiss against his fingers.

“Don’t thank me for this,” Nick said, because offering a little comfort when Sean was obviously suffering shouldn’t be a big event. He let his eyes stare blankly at the ceiling, wondering if he was going to be able to sleep at all in that bed, with Sean so close by.

Less than twenty minutes later, he was out like a light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You all have no idea how much all your comments and kudos mean to me. It's been a while since I wrote fanfiction this excitedly, and honestly, all the comments are making a great difference.  
> Thanks so much!  
> I have another couple of ideas for Grimm fics, but I'm commited to finish this one before starting any of the others. All suggestions are appreciated :)


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7.**

 

Nick woke up feeling warm, and was only half aware that he’d woken up because Renard was shifting against him as he carefully disentangled their limbs to get out of bed. The analytic part of his mind supplied that it meant that not only he had been fully able to fall asleep beside the captain, but he’d apparently been comfortable enough to cuddle tightly with him, but at that hour of the morning, his mind’s voice was barely a murmur, easy to dismiss.

He barely registered the kiss pressed against his forehead or the softly spoken: “Go back to sleep,” before his eyes closed again.

The next time he woke up, sunlight flooded the room and he could hear faint noises from the kitchen.

Before his mind could decide to linger on the fact that he was still in Renard’s bed, he went to what was increasingly feeling like his room and showered to wash the last traces of sleep off. He dressed quickly and went to the kitchen, knowing he’d find the captain there, and that talking was necessary, even if he really didn’t want to.

“Good morning,” greeted Renard, already sitting at the island where two bowls of oatmeal and plates of fruit were served. The strong smell of coffee suggested the cup halfway to Sean’s lips would be black and thick as ink.

“Morning,” he responded, taking the other place. He couldn’t help but stare, because the captain didn’t look different than any other morning, his white shirt crisp and the tie hanging from his neck, still unknotted. “So… how do you feel?”

“Not bad. Another cup of coffee and I’ll be perfectly fine.”

The detective didn’t miss the way Renard’s green eyes avoided his.

“Shouldn’t you have a massive headache or something? I mean, it’s good that you don’t, but…”

“I have good resistance to liquor.”

Nick wondered if it was a zauberbiest trait, but decided not to make things more awkward by voicing the question.

“Listen, Nick,” he said, finally meeting the Grimm’s eyes, “I’m sorry. About last night. I shouldn’t have taken your words like that, but it is… kind of a delicate subject.”

“It would be,” he nodded. “I… I didn’t mean to make light of something like that. It’s just that, as far as I knew, you’d been shot and you were in critical condition for a bit, but I never heard anything about you dying.”

“Yeah, well, I had help with that. I was dead for just a moment, but I was still dead. Just two people knew the truth about it, and you were one of them.”

The detective frowned as an idea came to his mind.

“Was the other person your mother?”

Sean gave him a quizzical look.

“Yes.”

“I remember meeting her,” and he had to wonder if, in the memories he did have, Renard had died as well. It was entirely possible that he had but, since he hadn’t been as close as in the real world, he wouldn’t necessarily have told him anything about it. “I thought she’d just been visiting because she was worried.”

“Well she was worried, and not without cause,” he paused, evidently making up his mind about something. “She was the one who brought me back.”

“Then we have to thank her,” he gave him a small smile, which Sean returned before lowering his eyes to his fruit salad for a moment.

The captain ate a few forkfuls before speaking again, radically changing the topic.

“I have to head to the city hall for a meeting. What about you?”

“Hank and I need to check the reports from the techs and from forensics to see if they have any leads for us to follow on the homeless guy.”

“Have an ID on him yet?”

“No. That’s another thing. We might have to go ask around, see if anybody knew him.”

“Be sure to let me know if you make any progress,” he said as he finished his breakfast.

“We will.”

Just a few minutes later, Sean left, giving Nick a pat on the shoulder that was beginning to become the norm, and looking as polished as always. It made Nick wonder if he’d later suffer a caffeine crash, or if he had taking something stronger than coffee and aspirin... perhaps the kind of thing that people couldn’t just buy at a drug store. He hadn’t seen any abnormal ingredients lying around, but that didn’t mean there was no stash of herbs hidden somewhere in the house.

Telling himself that it was childish to search his own home for potion ingredients, especially when some of those could belong to himself, he finished his breakfast, cleared the kitchen and headed out for the precinct.

***

To their total astonishment, the case seemed to solve itself up in just a couple of hours.

It turned out not only was the dead homeless guy known by other homeless people, but a couple of his friends had come up to report his disappearance, as well as the fact that some other guy was suddenly wearing the dead guy’s coat. The thief was so high it hadn’t taken them even thirty minutes to get a confession out of him which, paired with the screwdriver he’d used to stab the victim, still stained with blood and among his belongings, was more than enough to wrap things up.

Nick went to have a couple of beers with Hank, debating all the time whether to tell him about Sean’s death or not, and finally deciding not to. If it was as big a secret as Renard had made it sound, then it was most likely not something he’d share even with his partner.

“You’re brooding,” Hank finally said.

“I’m not.”

“If it’s something else you’re doing, I don’t know what it is, but it sure looks a lot like brooding.”

Nick laughed.

“It’s just… this is crazy, you know? I mean, I thought I had gotten used to this, to life as a Grimm. Even when it was something that touched close to home, like the zaubertranke you were given…”

“Oh, god, don’t even remind me of that,” Hank said before taking a swig off his beer.

“Or Juliette being put into a comma, or Rosalee getting infected with that strange virus. Hell, even me being put under the Baron’s spell. It sure was weird, but this? This has to be the one thing to top them all.”

“I was supposedly conscious and aware when I decided to marry my first ex-wife, and even like that I wonder how the hell that happened. I can only imagine what it would be like if I didn’t remember what brought me to that point.”

“Believe me,” Nick drained his bottle, “you’re good just imagining it.”

“I’ll bet,” Hank uncapped another beer and handed it to his friend. “Are you having difficulties with that?”

“With what?” he accepted the beer, and swore to himself it would be the last one for the evening.

“Figuring out what landed you where you are?”

“With Renard, you mean?”

Hank chuckled.

“If you’re still calling him Renard, then I’m guessing things aren’t exactly going smoothly.”

“It’s not too bad,” he said, deciding not to mention that he’d apparently managed to reduce their refined boss to a drunken mess the night before with just the power of his thoughtlessness. “I’m still making the transition into calling him by his first name. It’s been just a few days, you know?”

“So I’m guessing no action, either.”

Nick just glared at him.

“That’s a loud no, man,” Hank laughed. “Shouldn’t you be doing something to patch things up, then? Maybe having drinks with him instead of me.”

“I’ll call him and tell him to join us.”

“Oh, no, you’re not. Having him around for drinks was weird enough when you knew you were sleeping with him. Right now, it gives me the creeps just thinking about it.”

“Thanks for your unconditional support.”

“Anytime. But, look, man, here’s good advice,” he leaned in, pulling Nick closer in a conspiratorial manner. “Finish that beer, go home, shower or spray on more cologne, whatever, and find out why you ever thought sleeping with the guy was a good idea.”

Nick just shook his head. He had been wondering the same thing himself, and not just from one angle.

“Not that I’m following your plan, but maybe I should head home,” because they hadn’t talked all day, and since it was a Saturday night, perhaps having dinner together would be a good idea.

“Whatever, man. I’ll talk to you tomorrow and you can tell me how it went.”

“You know, if anything does happen, I’ll tell you every single detail about it.”

“I’ll pass.”

“See you,” he said, slapping a twenty on the bar to cover his part and gathering his jacket before walking out of the bar. It had a relaxed and casual atmosphere, nothing like the fancy place he’d found Renard the day before. He loved it precisely for that, and wondered, again, how he had ever gotten together with the captain. Their tastes were abysmally different, and the only thing they had in common was, as far as he could tell, that they sometimes fought the same battles. And maybe they were great together in bed, but that was not something he wanted to think about while heading back to meet with the man in question.

He was still wondering the same thing as he walked into the house, and was wondering how he’d make intelligent conversation while his mind was in the gutter when he stopped in his tracks, saved from having to figure anything out by finding Sean standing next to a blonde woman, still with his jacket on, with the tie off and the first few buttons of his shirt undone the only sign that he was home and not at the office.

“Good evening,” he greeted, barely managing to finish taking his jacket off as both turned to look at him.

“Are you sure?” the woman asked Renard.

“I am,” was the captain’s answer.

She leaned forward to caress his cheek, looking into his eyes.

“Leave it to me, then,” and she smiled at him. Sean nodded and returned the smile, but even from afar, Nick could tell it was rather sad.

“I’ll see you later,” and he turned to leave, stopping a step away from Nick. “You have met her, you said.”

“I have,” Nick answered.

“She needs to talk to you,” he took a deep breath. “I’ll be back later.”

“Ok,” the detective said, because the clouds in Sean’s eyes spoke of something serious, but at the same time didn’t welcome questions. He didn’t move when the captain leaned down and pressed a kiss to his cheekbone before leaving the house. Then, he was left there to wonder what he was supposed to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you might guess, big revelations will follow!  
> Here's hoping you'll like what comes in the next few chapters. And, of course, I want to thank you for all the comments and kudos and readings. It does mean a lot to me and is a great motivation to keep writing. Thanks so much!


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8.**

 

 

Elizabeth smiled and went to take a seat in the living room, obviously expecting him to follow. Nick noticed she moved with a grace that didn’t hide her strength, and realized it was the same kind of elegance that Sean moved with.

“Sean has told me of what happened to you.”

That got his attention immediately.

“Do you know what it was? Can you fix it?”

“I think I know what happened. And I fear there might be no way that I can help.”

Nick felt his guts twist. Not only did he feel the uneasiness of being left alone with this woman whom he didn’t trust, not only because she was very powerful regardless of her being a hexenbiest, but her words had a tinge of finality that didn’t sit well with him at all.

“Come on, Nicholas, sit down,” she indicated the sofa closest to the armchair she had taken. “You don’t have a reason to be afraid of me.”

The Grimm wasn’t convinced of that, still, he went to sit down, trying not to show how nervous he felt.

Her smile wasn’t exactly comforting.

“Sean told me the last thing you remember before waking up in complete disorientation was that you were chasing a wesen.”

“Yes.”

“And that you shot him.”

Again, he assented.

“Could you tell me what he looked like?”

Nick was acutely aware of how people felt when he interrogated them for a case.

“Pretty much human. And the woge was… different. His fingertips started to glow with this silver light…”

“And when that happened, his eyes turned silver as well? Solid silver, as if they’d gone blind?”

The detective was taken aback. He hadn’t exactly been hiding that little detail, but he was sure he hadn’t mentioned it to Renard.

“Yes, actually. Told him to stop, and since he wouldn’t, I shot him.”

Elizabeth arched her brows, as if that was the last piece she needed to complete the puzzle.

“You do know what happened.”

“I do. I just wanted confirmation before I told you anything,” she paused, and suddenly Nick knew where Sean’s melodrama had come from.

He assented, trying to be patient.

“The creature you met was no wesen.”

“What was he, then?”

“Nobody knows for sure. They are rare and very secretive beings. Some call themselves jumpers, others drifters… they are always on the move, never stay too long in one place… or in one time.”

“Time?”

“They jump through time with the same ease we move from one room to another. What you saw, that silver glow in the drifter’s fingers, was the equivalent of a key for them.”

“So what happened? I was placed in another time? I’m pretty sure I remember what day it was when I was chasing after him, and when I woke up, everything was different, but it was the day after my encounter with him.”

“No. You were exactly in the same time as you were before. But you did interfere with history, in such a way that changed a lot of things.”

“I—I don’t understand. I mean, I could understand that killing someone, or something, could change things… but wouldn’t the effects show from the point where the creature was killed onwards?”

“With you or me, yes. The world would go on without us and all the circumstances wouldn’t be exactly the same as if we were still alive. But this was not a normal creature you met, it was one that moves through time. Which means that in his life, after the moment you shot him, he would have gone to the past, and affected it in such a way that made it different from what it is now.”

“So that means what I remember is real. I’ve been thinking those memories were fake, but they were actually the real ones.”

“Your memories are real, you lived through the events you remember. But they are not the events that took place in the world. Not anymore.”

“So I basically killed that guy… and changed my past.”

“Not only yours,” she said. “As you might have noticed by now, the world has had a few changes that didn’t directly involve you.”

“Yes,” before his mind could go crazy thinking about possibilities, he asked: “How do I fix it? How do I make things be… what they used to be?”

“You can’t. Not easily.”

“I don’t care how difficult it is, I’m sure we can manage it if…”

“It is hard enough to be considered impossible.”

“Well, tell me what the solution is. Then I’ll know if I can do it or not.”

“I know because it happened to me,” she said with finality. “Listen with attention, Nick, because this is something I had never told anyone until this day.”

Nick nodded.

“You are well aware of what is said about hexenbiester. But whatever you have read, and whatever might be true about most of our kind, you know generalizations are never completely accurate,” she paused, for the first time looking away from Nick’s face. When she continued, she met his eyes again. “I loved Sean’s father. And having his son was as far from a strategic move as could be, regardless of what anyone might have thought. Having Sean made my life more difficult in many ways; all of a sudden, I had a much larger number of people wanting me dead, and an additional vulnerable point. However, having my son made it all worth it. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him.”

The detective didn’t doubt her for an instant. Even as her voice was calm, he could see the fierceness shining in her eyes.

“I don’t know if you’ve heard that I had to get both Sean and I out of Europe when he was just a boy. People were trying more actively to kill us, so I had no choice. Now, you see, during that time, I was ready to jump at shadows and tear them to shreds with my own hands. It was then that I met one of these creatures.”

“What happened then?”

“I attacked him. Didn’t kill him, just a scratch. But it was enough to make him flee from that time,” she visibly steeled herself to continue. “Next thing I knew, I was back in Vienna, still working for the family as if nothing had happened… and I didn’t have Sean with me anymore. I looked for him everywhere, but he was simply gone. It took me a while, but I finally learnt the truth: he wasn’t dead, he had simply never been born. I left Vienna, still looking for answers. It took me years to learn about the drifters. And then, I spent the rest of my life searching for another drifter. I did nothing else, and I just barely managed to find one of these drifters. Then I begged her to help me get my son back. She drifted back to when I started running, and told me not to interfere with the drifter I would meet later.”

“Then you have to help me find one of them!”

“Have you been listening? It took me my whole life to find one of them, and I have to remind you that hexenbiester have longer lives than kehrseite... and certainly longer than Grimms. And then, there is the fact that they like to keep to themselves. And they’re not especially altruistic, either. My case was very simple when I begged the drifter to help me; it was a plea from one mother to another. What would you say to gain their help?”

“So these beings just jump around changing the world and the rest of us just have to deal with it?”

Elizabeth gave him an unimpressed look.

“You were the one who killed one of these beings. So the change is, in fact, your responsibility. And so are your current circumstances. Because you have to be aware of this: time is fluid. You make a single tiny change, and its ripples extend to all of it like the waves of a stone thrown into a pond. Sometimes the effects are big, sometimes they are small. But once a change is made, things are never exactly the same as they were before. The world you see around you is the result of your own actions and decisions, in a world where something changed in the past. In other words, this world you are experiencing now is the real one, and the one you remember does not exist anymore; and even if you somehow managed to undo that single action, the world would never revert to be the exact one you remember. It doesn’t even depend solely on you, because every single living being in this world affects the course of history.”

“Then why am I the only one who remembers the… the other past?”

“Because you were the one to trigger it, along with the drifter.”

“So you’re saying… I’m trapped here.”

“As much as everyone is trapped in their own lives, yes.”

“Then why tell me this?”

Elizabeth regarded him, with a slightly tilted head.

“Sean thought it would be unfair to keep you in the dark about what happened to your life. And he believes you should be able to decide what to do about it.”

“So if I decided to go search for this creature…”

“I’d give you as much information as I can, and wish you good luck.”

Nick ran his fingers through his hair in impatience, aware that the hexenbiest’s blue eyes didn’t leave him for a second.

“Some people would say that Sean doesn’t trust people easily.”

“That sounds like an understatement.”

Elizabeth’s smile was one of genuine pleasure.

“It is. The truth is, Sean doesn’t trust people, period,” she looked down at her hands for a moment. “A mother wishes nothing more than seeing her children healthy and happy. And although the way I raised Sean has made him into a lonely person that often craves closeness but is too wary of it… well, under certain circumstances, I decided that seeing him alive was more important than him being perfectly happy. It was a hard decision, but it is one I have never regretted, to this day.”

The Grimm felt a little uncomfortable hearing that, like it was a confession meant for someone much closer to Sean than he really was.

“It made me very happy to learn that he’d found someone he could trust in you. A Grimm wouldn’t have been my first choice for my son, had I had any input in the matter. But his life is strange enough, even for a wesen who also happens to be a rogue member of old royalty, and from what I’ve seen so far, having you around hasn’t made it more difficult. Far from it.”

“So you’re saying I should just leave this be.”

“I’m putting all the cards on the table for you, Grimm.”

“And protecting your son’s love life?”

“And giving you another perspective. You were brought to this point of your life by your own decisions, even if you cannot remember them now. And I know that up until now, you’ve been thinking about all the things you’ve lost from the past you remember. Maybe you haven’t thought about the things you’ve gained. And those around you.”

“Were you ever in this position, when it happened to you?”

“No. When my life was changed, I was safe and had a comfortable place in the world; but it was my son I had lost, the single most important thing in my life. I never had any doubts about what I had to do.”

Nick’s eyes went to rest on the coffee table as he thought things over.

His mind immediately went to Juliette, directed by Elizabeth’s words. He missed her, especially now that he knew it had all been real. But at the same time, he couldn’t help but think of Juliette as she was now, a lot safer and perhaps even happier than she’d ever been with him.

He knew it was a decision he couldn’t make right away.

Elizabeth seemed to read his mind.

“You’ll need time to think,” she stretched in her seat before she rose, graceful as a feline. Her voice was gentle when she added something else. “And, Nick, you fell in love with him once already. It isn’t hard to think it could happen again.”


	10. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9.**

 

 

 Renard returned home only after he got the call from his mother, who refused to have him drive her to her hotel. He hadn’t known if Nick would still be there, or if he’d be gone to chase after those drifter creatures or something, and a sigh of relief escaped his lips as he parked the car and saw Nick’s car was still there. His heart hammered in his chest as he entered the house and saw the lights on.

He found Nick sitting in the living room, and he stopped where he was standing. The Grimm was drinking whisky, which meant he was really shaken, because he usually went for beer.

Without a word, he went to retrieve a tumbler from a cabinet, and then he took a seat on the couch, leaving some space between him and Nick. Perhaps it wasn’t the bravest thing to do, but he didn’t think he could have that conversation looking directly at Nick all the while, which would be harder to do if they were sitting on the same couch. He poured himself a few fingers of the amber liquor and just nursed the drink for long minutes, letting Nick decide when to break the silence.

“I guess you know what your mother had to tell me.”

“I do,” he said, and then, after a pause: “Of all the possible reasons why I could have not been born, that one isn’t even the most… original, to put it in a way. It does rank pretty high on the list, though. I have to wonder how many others I haven’t heard about.”

“You didn’t know this story either?”

“No. Not until today.”

“Then I guess it’s been a day of shocks for both of us.” He took another sip of his whisky. “You could have listened and then asked your mother not to tell me the truth. I’d be trying to recover lost memories or to fill up the gaps, otherwise.”

Sean took a long moment to answer that.

“You looked really depressed because you lost what you remember having with Juliette. You must miss her a lot. So it seems only fair that you get to make a decision knowing the full truth.”

Nick had seen enough of some different sides of Renard in the last few days to know a bit more about the man behind the police captain and the half wesen bastard prince, but that kind of consideration still clashed with the image he had of him.

“Thank you for that. I mean it.”

“You’re welcome, Nick,” he took another sip of his drink and opened his mouth to say something else, but hesitated a moment. “Nick, I need you to listen to this, alright?”

“What is it?” the detective asked, turning to look at him, though the zauberbiest’s eyes remained lost in the golden color of the expensive drink.

“I love you, Nick. And although you might not remember it now, you’ve told me you feel the same way… and I believe you meant it. So I would ask you to give me a chance… if that is what you want. If your happiness lies somewhere else, though, you should go find it,” he paused, took a gulp of the whisky in his hand and then returned to stare at it.

“I don’t mean this to hurt you. But I have to be honest with you, this isn’t a decision I can make right away.”

“And I don’t expect you to. You don’t have to worry about moving out, you are welcome to stay for as long as you want, regardless of what you decide to do. And you don’t have to worry about me, either. I won’t push you, and I promise to give you as much space and time as you need to figure this out.”

“Thanks.”

Sean smiled another of those subtle, unhappy smiles that barely touched the corner of his lips, and Nick wondered if they were common and he’d never noticed them, or if the man had just never showed them to him before.

“I’m going to bed,” Sean said after a while in complete silence, the whisky long gone from his glass and warming his blood in a way he was grateful for.

“Good night,” Nick said as the captain passed by him on his way to the master bedroom. He wasn’t surprised when he didn’t get an answer, and he stayed where he was until he entirely lost track of time. Then he took the tumblers to the kitchen to be washed the following day –or later, he couldn’t tell–, put the half empty bottle of whisky back in the cabinet, and made his way to his room.

The bed was comfortable, and the alcohol in his veins, both from the whisky and the earlier beers, should have helped him sleep, but he was wide awake. His mind wouldn’t stop considering all the possibilities. It was normal to fear the unknown, Juliette had said many times, it was a primal, instinctual reaction before something that could be life-threatening; and while the decision he took on the matter maybe wouldn’t be life-threatening, it sure would be life-altering.

His first impulse was to go and do his damnedest to track down one of the time jumpers, to try to get his old life back, to get to have another chance with Juliette. But the rational part of his mind forced him to slow down and consider what Elizabeth had told him, contrasted with what he knew.

According to the hexenbiest, everything could change radically with just a small action that was taken differently, and he couldn’t stop thinking about Renard’s death. He remembered hearing that the captain was in critical condition when he’d been taken to the hospital, and the doctors had nearly lost him. It was entirely possible that, being just reticent allies as they were, the Sean Renard he remembered had died in the hospital and been brought back by his mother, and he had just kept that secret from him, just as he kept many others. But what if he hadn’t? What if it was one of those changes Elizabeth had told him about? What if he somehow managed to get a grip of one of the creatures and get them to help him, and then things changed for the worse? What if Elizabeth didn’t get to the hospital in time to bring the captain back?

It was then that Nick realized that he was thinking about Renard because, despite the situation he found himself in with the man, he still felt somewhat… removed. As cruel as it might be, it was easier to think about him dying –something that had already happened, anyway– than it was to think of Juliette never waking up from the comma Adalind had put her in, or never regaining her memories of him, or being hurt by some other creature… or being killed. Juliette wasn’t the only one, either. If he took that path and succeeded, he had no way of knowing what would happen to Hank, or Monroe, or Rosalee. Or himself. God knew he’d been close to getting killed way too many times.

He pressed his temples with his hands, feeling a dull throb beginning there. Trying to recover what he’d lost would be like throwing a handful of dices to decide the world’s destiny. He wasn’t sure he wanted that kind of responsibility on his shoulders. He could go crazy thinking about it all, he knew. Just as he knew that he couldn’t just make himself stop thinking about it.

He had somehow fallen asleep at some point of dawn, because Nick found himself waking up later. He pulled the cellphone out of the pocket of the pants he was still wearing, and saw that it was barely eight in the morning. His head felt heavy, but considering the amounts of alcohol and the kind of news he’d gotten last night, he was fairly alright.

Morning light didn’t make things exactly easy, but at least he didn’t feel like he was in the middle of a tornado anymore. He took a few deep breaths and forced himself out of bed and into the shower. He had to somehow make up his mind, but he knew that wasn’t something he could do just lying in bed and thinking things over. He needed to talk to some of the people he trusted, in person.

Unless there was some emergency, he didn’t expect to be called in on a Sunday, so he had some time and the faster he could get his life sorted out, the better.

He hadn’t expected to find Sean in the kitchen, finishing his breakfast, and he kicked himself for that thought. Maybe it was simply that he hadn’t given any thought to what Renard did in his days off, but he shouldn’t have been surprised to see him there, eating breakfast in casual clothes. The detective in him couldn’t help but notice that, although he looked as sharp as always even in jeans and a sweater, his eyes were a bit red.

“Morning,” he greeted, trying for casual.

“Good morning.”

Nick didn’t feel like cooking, so he just grabbed a bowl of cereal and sat at what had quickly become his place at the kitchen island.

“Got any plans for today?” he asked after a few spoonfuls.

“The usual. Picking up the dry-cleaning, getting groceries…” he finished his coffee. “Other than that, I’m having lunch with my mother. I don’t know if you know, but we don’t see each other very often.”

“She doesn’t live in Portland, right?”

“No.”

“Then you should definitely spend some time with her.”

Renard nodded, and Nick could see his hesitation.

“Are you alright?” the captain asked.

“I think… Yeah, I think I am. There’s still a lot I have to think about and that I need to figure out, but I think I’m ok,” which meant he at least wasn’t freaking out as badly as he’d been the day before. The zauberbiest seemed to get what he meant, though, if his half smile was any indication. “There’s a few… things I need to do today. A few people I need to talk to.”

“Juliette,” and that wasn’t a question.

This time, Nick had no doubt about Sean’s half-masked jealousy, and wondered if Juliette had always been a sore subject in their relationship. Maybe his feelings for Juliette had never faded? He had no way of knowing for sure, but being with someone else while he was still hung up on Juliette didn’t sound like something he’d do; much less if things were serious enough that he was living with said someone else.

Nick caught himself avoiding to think specifically of Sean when his thoughts went in that direction, and winced. Perhaps it was easier to consider if he could disassociate the matter of breaking up with Juliette from the guy he was now involved with, but if he was going to ever be in control of his life again, he needed to face all the complications directly.

He felt Sean staring at him, and he lifted his eyes from his cereal bowl to meet green ones.

“You’re thinking too hard.”

“Maybe,” he conceded, because that was an understatement if there ever was one.

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Sean said as he gathered his dishes and put them in the washer, somehow managing to sound both serious and mocking at the same time.

The Grimm felt a smile stretch his lips.

“I’ll try,” he said at Sean’s back as the other man left.

Left alone, he finished his breakfast trying to map out a plan for himself, and finally settled for talking to Monroe first. It was only when he was clearing out the remains of his breakfast that he realized what had felt off that morning, pending life-defining decisions aside: it was the first time since he’d found himself in this new life, that Sean had had breakfast on his own, not waiting for him. Not that he had any right to be surprised, seeing how things were between them at the moment. Could that even be considered a break up? And what the hell were they? Roommates was technically correct at the moment, but despite Sean’s earlier words, Nick wasn’t sure they could be just that without things getting awkward pretty fast.

***

Later, he was sitting at a café with Monroe, his coffee untouched while he told his friend what he’d heard from Elizabeth.

“Dude, I gotta tell you, even for a Grimm, you sure attract the weirdest stuff to yourself!” he laughed.

“Tell me about it.”

“I think something like that happened to an older cousin of my great great great grandfather on my mother’s side. It’s one of those mostly forgotten embarrassing family stories that nobody knows all the details to anymore. No one ever tried to make sure what had happened, because of course nobody believed him. Which wasn’t that strange, considering he was the kind of blutbad to go out naked on full moon nights to run, hunt and terrorize the townspeople. Just for fun, you know. But with the way he acted, when that happened, everyone must have thought he just hit his head or something.”

“Huh. Well, I’d say nothing that weird happened in my family, but…”

“But there’s a whole trailer full of such things, isn’t there?”

“Yeah.”

“And you’ve checked everything? Are you sure there’s nothing in there about these… drifter guys?”

“I think so. I mean, unless there was something that was written in something not English and also had no illustrations with it.”

“If these creatures or whatever they are, are as rare as that hexenbiest told you, then it’s entirely possible that none of your ancestors has ever met one. For all we know, you may be the first Grimm to encounter one of them and actually know it. Even if one of your ancestors did meet a time jumper, maybe they just didn’t notice they were in front of a non-human… or they lopped the jumper’s head off and didn’t bother to find out what they were.”

Nick grimaced. It was painfully likely, since records were enough to prove that his ancestors cut heads first and never asked questions later way too often.

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m not sure, yet.”

“What does the boyfriend say about it?”

It took Nick a couple of seconds to know who Monroe meant.

“Oh. Um… well, he said that…” he interrupted himself, “boyfriend?” he asked with a laugh that he hoped didn’t sound as nervous to Monroe as it did to himself. “Is that… what we’re supposed to be?”

“I’d say it sounds about right, right?”

Nick shook his head.

“It’s hard to think about him that way when I don’t remember us being even friends.”

“So what? He was just your boss, then?”

“And an… ally. Sometimes. Most of the time we could only speculate on what the hell he was doing.”

“Huh,” Monroe let out and just stared at him.

“What?” the Grimm asked.

“Nothing, it’s just… you know, it sounds so strange coming from you when we’re all used to you knowing everything about him. And I mean everything. Like, we could be busy a whole day and you’d still know where he was or what he was doing or why he’d done something that didn’t make sense to anyone else. It actually got a bit creepy at times, you know?”

“It does sound a bit creepy.”

“Tell me about it! And that’s after we all got used to it, because trust me, it did take us a while to get used to the two of you being together.”

“When did that happen?”

“I’m not sure. A good while ago. You were still kind of getting over Juliette, I think. And then you were with him and we all thought you might be under the influence of a zaubertranke or the dual-life-thing had finally made you tip over with stress or something, but you were pretty sure of what you were doing,” he paused, looking guilty as he obviously considered telling him something more. “And, ok, maybe Rosalee and I did slip you a thing or two to test you for any strange influences. Once or twice. Or maybe five or six times, but man, you gotta understand, we were worried about you. Falling in love with a hexenbiest, or a zauberbiest, in this case, well, that’s not exactly normal, you know?”

“Hey, I’m not complaining. Right now I’m having some trouble seeing how it happened, myself.”

“Well, you sure didn’t, back then. You were always ready to defend him whenever we asked you if you knew what you were getting into.”

“I did?”

“Yeah. And, man, you should’ve heard yourself. You were so bad at times, you sounded like a teenager with a crush. And a bad one.”

Nick let out a short laugh himself. It was sort of funny, despite the very serious implications.

“So, what? I ended up convincing you all that he was… so great?”

“Not… exactly. No,” the blutbad said, making a face.

“So?”

“It was kind of a progressive thing. You went out for drinks or something, and then, he was regularly helping you out with the Grimm stuff and you were regularly helping him out with whatever secretive underground rogue-royal-ish things he’s always up to, and then you were like, finally officially dating, and then he kind of took a bullet for you so when you said you were moving in together we all were ok with it because we figured it might actually be the real thing, you know?”

“A bullet?”

“Well, not so much a bullet as a claw-slash to the back, but that’s sort of the Grimm equivalent for it, right? And, yeah, you’re like… hunting partners, or something. Which is hella weird, because let me tell you, if a blutbad teaming up with a Grimm is unheard of, a zauberbiest and a Grimm team is way beyond that. I’d say that stranger things happen, but I’m not so sure it is actually true in this case. ”

Nick considered that for a moment.

“Wait. You said that humans don’t fall in love with hexenbiester. At all.”

“Yeah, which is why Rosalee and I wanted to test you,” Monroe said in a tone that told it was obvious. “People tend not to fall for them on their own, since they’re not exactly the warm and cuddly kind. But then, neither are Grimms, so I guess that kind of balances it out.”

“As much as any of us can have a balanced life, I guess,” Nick added. Despite all the things he’d seen, it was still a bit strange to think of himself as something other than human.

Monroe nodded, laughing. Then, the blutbad looked at his watch.

“Hey, I need to go. I promised Rosalee to help her out with a few things at the shop, so…”

“Oh. Sure, no problem.”

“Sorry, but…”

“No, no, it’s alright. Seriously. You’ve been a lot of help.”

“Well, if there’s anything else me or Rosalee can do for you, you just have to call us. Or if things go, you know, not as smoothly as you hope and suddenly you need a place to crash, you’re always welcome in our house.”

“Thanks, Monroe. For real,” and then, he just sat there for a couple more minutes in front of his still intact cup of cold coffee. He needed to talk to Juliette.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost didn't update today!  
> Work's been crazy these past few days, and after I got home, I was totally exahusted. But I figured I could force myself to be awake a bit longer, just enough to post a new chapter.  
> I hope you all enjoy what's coming, and please, let me know if you have any comments, ideas, suggestions, want to point out any mistakes, and all that. Comments are what a writer's souls feeds on! :3


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10.**

 

 

“Is this going to become a habit?” Juliette asked teasingly as she opened the door, a big smile on her face.

“Should I go, then?” Nick answered with a smile.

“Of course not! I wasn’t complaining, you know?” then, she grabbed his arm and pulled him into the house. “I might or might not have been looking for an excuse to procrastinate folding and putting away the laundry.”

“Oh, in that case, I’m happy to help.”

“With laundry or with procrastination?”

“Hm…” he pretended to think about it for a moment. “The latter.”

“Figured as much,” she said, her nose wrinkling for an instant that made Nick miss her all over again.

He followed her to the living room, where he made himself at home on the familiar couch.

“Would you like something to drink? Tea, lemonade, a beer?”

“Tea’s fine,” he said, because it was still too early to get drunk, and with all the things in his head, he might do just that instead of having just one.

“I’ll be back in a minute,” and she disappeared into the kitchen. She’d apparently been making tea, because it took her no time at all to return with two cups of rich-smelling tea. When Nick inhaled the aromatic steam, Juliette smiled and commented: “It’s a mix from Rosalee.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t smell like the cheap ones in small bags,” he took a sip, and found it didn’t taste like boxed tea from a supermarket, either.

“Are you still having problems with your memories?” Juliette asked with genuine interest.

Nick leaned back against the backrest of the couch.

“That’s mostly why I’m here. I’m still having the same problem, but I found out a few things.”

“Good or bad?”

“It depends, I guess.”

“The mysterious thing is rubbing off on you.”

The detective could only chuckle at that.

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No, I don’t think so. Makes you more interesting and everything,” she toed her shoes off and pulled her legs onto the couch, like Nick had seen her to a thousand times.

“Do you remember Elizabeth Lascelles?”

“That’s Sean’s mother, right?”

“She is. Well, she was at the house when I got back yesterday…” he started, and then, telling her all of it was suddenly a lot easier than he’d expected.

Half an hour later, Juliette was staring at him with a slight frown on her face.

“So, that means…” she said carefully, “that in this other world you remember we were actually still together?”

“Yes. And it’s not another world, it’s just… a different set of circumstances. And not too different, from what I can tell.”

“Well if you remember us still living together then they _were_ kind of very different, don’t you think?”

“Yes, there is that. But there’s so many other things that haven’t changed at all. Or, if they’ve changed, they’re the result of a single little event that went different from the first time around.”

“Maybe, but,” Juliette said, “I think that whatever little change caused all of this? Whatever event or decision or whatever it was? I think it was for the better,” she paused, and didn’t need him to ask her to elaborate. “I think we were headed down that road, anyway. I think it would have happened sooner or later, and I think it was better that it happened sooner. And maybe it’s hard for you to see it right now, but… you’re much better with Sean. You’ve said so yourself. Maybe not in so many words, but you don’t have to worry about what can happen to the person you love because of what you’re doing and what you are, because we all know he can take care of himself just fine. Now you have someone who can fight and hunt and all those things with you. He keeps the same weird hours as you when you’re working on a case. Nobody’s holding you back anymore. And you’re loved and cared for. Wouldn’t you say that’s a change for the better?”

Nick smiled a crooked smile. It was getting a bit easier to hear about his relationship with the man he’d known as his boss for a long time, but it was still a little strange.

“You’re saying a lot of things about me. But what about you?”

Her smile held no uneasiness, even as it was obvious that she was choosing her words carefully.

“I think the change’s been for the better for me, too.”

The Grimm let out a short laugh.

“I mean, I finally know what’s going on in the world, more or less,” Juliette continued. “I don’t have wesen criminals coming after me to get at their primary predator, I can sleep at normal hours, I still get to see exciting things and to help you out whenever it’s possible, and I’m dating Dan, who’s a veterinarian, which means he keeps a human schedule and I don’t have to worry all the time that he’s going to end up hurt in duty or in a Grimm hunt.”

“Ok, way to crush a guy’s self-confidence.”

She shrugged, grinning at him.

“Oh, it’s been wonderful for mine.”

“I’ll bet.”

“No, really. I mean, you had to cross genders to get together with someone else. And, it wasn’t just any guy, either. It took a wesen prince for you to finally get over me. Of course it was good for my ego.”

“If you put it that way…”

“I am choosing to put it that way,” she said with a barely contained laugh. “It did surprise me a little bit when you first got together with him. Not just because I never even suspected you liked men, but…”

“I do. Like men. And women. I usually prefer women, though,” he interrupted, and felt his face flush as he half-stumbled through the explanation at Juliette’s grin.

“I know. You told me, a long time ago,” she gave his arm a squeeze. “I was more surprised by whom it turned out to be. I mean, I’ve known him for a while, even if just in passing, and he always seemed kind of… distant. Almost cold, at times. Diana’s birth proves he’s not that… impersonal, I guess, but it was still a bit odd. That, and his being your boss.”

Nick had had the chance to see how they handled their professional lives already, and he’d been relieved to find that apparently, they’d chosen to just act the same while they were at work. Diana, the little girl Adalind had given birth to, however, hadn’t so much as crossed his mind since he’d wondered if his mother was still alive and on the run in this version of the world, too. That was something to look into.

“We manage. I think.”

Juliette gave him a happy smile.

“You do. Wonderfully, I might add.”

“So you’re telling me that I should just move on, and continue this thing with Sean?” he asked, because it was better than asking her directly if she was completely sure she’d never give him another chance. A direct question would invite a direct answer, and he didn’t think he needed that right then.

“I’m telling you we did move on, a while ago. And I’m also telling you that he’s good for you… despite all his mystery and complications and occasional creepiness,” she looked directly into his eyes. “You do love him, you know? You’ve told me so, more than once. I think you’ll eventually catch up with that.”

“What if I can’t do that?”

“I know you will. I know you well enough. And, worst case scenario, you might break up with him, move out on your own, and eventually be friends with him again.”

He was going to say he didn’t know if such a thing was possible, but then he realized, Juliette was talking from experience. They had managed to remain friends after their own break-up, so of course Juliette would think it was possible between him and Renard as well.

 _This Juliette,_ he reminded himself, because if one thing was crystal clear to him now, was that this was not the Juliette he’d loved. The woman he remembered was gone, as were the circumstances under which they could’ve had a good happy life together. She had her own good happy life now, and he had no right to take that away from her.

“What is it?” Juliette asked, gently. “You’re looking sad, what are you thinking about?”

“Too many things at once. That I miss what I had, and I don’t know how to start getting used to all this. That maybe after a while I’ll think I finally got it and then some little detail will throw me off because it went differently this time around.”

“It’s the unknown. All living beings are scared of what they’re unfamiliar with. It’s instinct, you know? A self-preservation impulse to stick to what you know is safe. A great thing we have in common with the rest of the animals,” she grinned. “It makes plunging into the unknown so much more exciting, though.”

***

By the time he got back to the house, he was feeling strangely relaxed, a couple of takeout burgers and fries in a paper bag in his hand.

He found Sean sitting in the dining room, forehead resting on one hand as he poured over one of the books he’d brought from the trailer, a glass of red wine next to the old volume.

“Hey,” he greeted.

“Nick,” and green eyes lifted from the book to look at the Grimm. “I was wondering if there could be anything on these time drifters in your books. Even if the beings are not wesen, their non-human status would be enough to attract your ancestors’ interest. They wouldn’t be the first non-wesen creature they documented.”

“True,” he took the chair on the head of the table closest to Renard. “Not sure there would be any more information than what your mother told us, even if there was something on them, though.”

“There’s still plenty of interesting things here,” he tapped the page he’d been reading. “Gives you a whole new perspective on Genghis Khan’s conquests.”

“The things in those books have been giving me a new perspective on everything I knew,” he set the paper bag on the table. “Had dinner yet?”

“No. I dropped my mother off at the airport and then came here.”

“She left already?”

Sean somehow managed to make a half-shrug look elegant.

“She has things she needs to take care of on her own,” the captain said, but Nick could have sworn he looked a little sad.

What was he supposed to say? Was he supposed to say anything at all? Renard didn’t look like he’d welcome any questions about his mother, at least not at the moment, and he had to wonder if he knew more about this woman, if Renard had told him more about her.

“I brought burgers. If you eat that sort of thing,” he said, finally.

“I eat burgers,” Sean said, a glint of amusement in his eyes.

“I’ll go grab a beer.”

When he returned to the dining room, Sean had already unwrapped their food.

“Did you find the answers you wanted?” he asked casually, dipping a fry in ketchup.

The detective thought about it for a moment, grateful for the seconds it took him to finish with the bite of burger he had in his mouth.

“I think I got the answers I needed,” he said, and realized it was the truth. He had, without noticing, already made a decision. He just needed to wrap his head around it.


	12. Chapter 11: Games

**Chapter 11.**

 

 

If he’d thought that making a decision on what he wanted to do with his life was hard, Nick found that acknowledging that decision was harder. Even worse was letting the people in his life know, especially where it regarded Sean Renard, who was perhaps the first person he should’ve told of his plans.

Cowardice was also hard to admit to, but after four full days of searching for the right words and waiting for the right moment to say them, he was willing to surrender and call himself a coward.

It didn’t surprise him at all when his phone ringed just as he was about to lie down in bed.

“Juliette?”

“Hi, Nick,” she sounded cheerful, and it brought a smile to his lips. “How’s life been?”

“Tiring. We were working on three cases at the same time. We managed to close one today, and we’re waiting for some lab tests for the other two.”

“Uh huh,” she said in a way that made it evident she wasn’t that interested in his work. She waited for a moment, and decided to press when he didn’t volunteer anything else. “What about other, more personal things?”

“It’s…” and how was he supposed to say that he was still at the exact same point as last time they’d talked on Monday?

“You’re still playing college dorm roommates, aren’t you?”

Nick winced. He’d actually been doing a lot more with his college roommate than he was with Sean, but he wasn’t about to tell Juliette that.

“Sort of,” the detective said, because it was an answer that didn’t make things worse.

“Chicken,” she accused teasingly.

“It’s harder than it sounds. How am I supposed to tell him anything after how awkward these days have been?”

“What are you saying? You live with the guy! He knows how you are, I’m pretty sure he’ll hear you out, whatever it is you have to tell him.”

“About that… I was thinking moving out might be a good idea.”

“What? You said you had decided to give it a try. Did you change your mind so fast?”

“No, I haven’t. But it might actually be easier to try something if we’re not living in the same house. Or not?” he rubbed his eyes with his fingers. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Well… you know what day the day after tomorrow is, right?”

“February the fourteenth,” he answered automatically.

“Yes.” As only silence followed, she continued. “Also known as Valentine’s?”

Nick huffed out a humorless laugh.

“Nick, I’m serious. If you can’t think of how to have that conversation, then you can take the chance the date offers. It should be easier to talk about it over dinner. Or even lunch, if you want something less formal.”

“I don’t know…”

“It’s a special date, you should try doing something special. Dan and I have reservations for dinner at a very nice place. I heard you have to book it months prior if you want to get a table, but Dan has a friend who knows someone, and he got us a table for Valentine’s,” she said with obvious delight. “So maybe not dinner, but if you can’t find how to even start that conversation, then you should do something that lets him know you’re still interested. Otherwise, he’ll never know what’s going through your mind, you know?”

“Yeah… I’ll think about it. Figure something out.”

“You do that. Now I’m going to bed. I need to catch up on my beauty sleep or I’ll look like a raccoon on my special dinner date.”

“Good night, Juliette.”

“Good night, Nick.”

He looked at his cellphone for a little while after the call ended. He already knew he didn’t want to do anything specifically for Valentine’s… that was just too corny. But that didn’t mean Juliette wasn’t right.

Making a quick plan, he changed the alarm’s time and left his phone on the night stand.

***

Nick woke up with the sound of his alarm and for a moment, regretted his plan. He took a moment to stretch his back and rub the sleep off his eyes, and then he pulled himself out of bed and into the shower.

In the days that had followed the sudden change in his life, Sean had made breakfast for both of them; later, after Elizabeth explained the situation to them, Sean had promised to give him space, and he had done so, which apparently entailed not including him in his plans for breakfast. Nick thought it was a bit excessive, since Monroe and him had often eaten together when he was living at his friend’s place, but he also was in no place to complain about things.

In any case, if Sean had made a point of not cooking breakfast for him as a way to give him space, Nick thought it might be a good idea to do the opposite to invite him to get closer.

Toast, scrambled eggs with ham, fruit and coffee. Nothing fancy, but he hoped it was enough to get the message across.

He finished serving the food and, repeating to himself that he was not nervous, sat to wait for a few minutes. Then he waited some more, until he started worrying that everything would be cold enough to be inedible by the time Sean decided to show up at the kitchen.

Finally, he decided he’d waited long enough and went to the master bedroom, feeling a bit silly as he knocked on the door.

“Yes?” and Nick frowned when the immediate answer seemed to come from right next to the door.

“Sean? I was just wondering if you’ll take much longer.” No answer came. “I made breakfast.”

That they were still on time but risked being late if they took much longer went without saying. The pause was enough to let Nick know that something was off.

“I’ll be there in a minute,” the captain said at last.

“Ok,” and Nick returned to the kitchen, putting the eggs in the microwave to reheat them.

Just a couple of minutes later, Sean entered the kitchen, looking as he did on those days he arrived at the precinct with thunders in his eyes and many important things in his mind.

“Good morning.”

Renard took his usual place at the kitchen island and just fixed Nick with a stare.

“Is something wrong?”

“I’m not sure,” the captain said, and Nick thought he looked particularly tense despite the stoic mask he wore as usual. “I have something I need your help with. And since I know you may not remember anything about it, it might turn out to be some unofficial detective work.”

“I’ll be happy to help, of course,” he tried a smile, but the tension in the air didn’t exactly help.

The zauberbiest took something from his pocket and put it on the island, never taking his eyes off the Grimm.

Nick felt the half-assed smile vanish and a shudder crawl down his back.

It was a small box, its black, rounded shape very familiar.

“You once told me you had bought it, a long time ago. You never told me you still had it.”

He didn’t know what to say, so he just shook his head.

“I know you don’t remember this, but you’re still yourself, so tell me _why_. Why would you keep it after all this time? Why would this be in _our_ house?”

 _Why, indeed?_ He couldn’t come up with any good explanations, even as his mind suggested a lot of possibilities. Had he simply forgotten about it? Had he kept it for some reason? Had he been unable to get over Juliette, despite what everyone had said? Had he been playing with Sean? He felt almost sick at that last thought. He was ready to freely admit that he had a long list of defects, but he wanted to believe he was a better person than that.

“I don’t know,” he said, finally. “I really don’t know, and I’m sorry for that.”

Pain flashed like lightning in green eyes, and Sean lowered his gaze to the velvet box.

Nick knew it was the moment, and he had to grasp it before it was gone forever.

“I don’t know why it would still be here,” he said, unable to refer to himself as _he_ , even if it had been technically another person. And he took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he had to say. “What I do know is that I’ve been trying to tell you something these days. Since Monday. Hell, since Sunday night, I think. I want to try to make this right. With you, I mean. I don’t remember how we got to the point you remember us being at. But I’d like to know why I woke up and found us living together.”

Sean’s lips parted, and Nick braced himself for anything. For enthusiasm, for hesitance, for outright rejection… but no words came out. It was oddly comforting to know he wasn’t the only one having a hard time finding what to say.

“If you’ll agree to it, that is.”

“Why?” Sean asked again, and his voice sounded hollow. “Why right now? Why…?”

“Like I said, I don’t know about the ring. I could come up with a few theories if I tried, but they’d be just that, theories. Just like the ones you could come up with by yourself. I can only tell you what I think right now and what decision I’ve reached after these few but very complicated days. Now, you said that you’d be happy if we could try to work things out together…”

“Before I found this,” he interrupted him, stabbing the velvet box with a finger. “It is one thing to see you hung up on Juliette when you remember being with her and don’t remember a thing that went on between us. But to know that the Nick I knew” _and loved_ , he left unsaid, though both could hear it as clearly as if it had been spoken aloud, “might have still been thinking of her…”

Nick found his eyes locked with Sean’s, and unable to leave them despite the turmoil in their green depth.

“I don’t enjoy being toyed with. I don’t tolerate being betrayed. If it was you who did something like it…” he stopped, visibly swallowing around a growing lump in his throat. “The first time we got together, you were still trying to get over your feelings for her. My own life was very complicated at the moment, so it worked for the both of us. But I can’t go back to nothing being certain. Not now that so many things are moving. Right now, I need to know where I am standing, Nick.”

“I can’t know for sure what was happening before. But I know that I wouldn’t move in with someone who wasn’t important, or while I was thinking of someone else. And while I don’t remember what I was doing, I do know what I want to do, what I want to try,” he paused, taking the small black box from under Sean’s finger and pushing it to the side. “That’s what breakfast was about. A friend suggested that maybe I should try asking you out for tomorrow night… I feared it might be a bit much, so I decided to start with something simpler. But I want to start. Like you said, we’re obviously not living together to save on rent; so I want to find out how we make things work together.”

“So you want to start over?”

“You’ll have to cut me some slack. It is a fresh start for me,” Nick shrugged self-deprecatingly.

“Perhaps it is for the best that it’s a fresh start for both of us,” he said, reaching for the hand the detective was still resting on the stone surface.

“That works,” he answered, allowing his fingers to thread with Sean’s.

“Your friend,” and he pointedly not asked whom. He didn’t think he could tolerate to hear Juliette’s name come up at the moment, “might have been on to something, though. You don’t remember that either, but we do have reservations for dinner tomorrow. I’ve been meaning to ask you if I should cancel it.”

Nick shook his head.

“Don’t worry. It’s nothing too fancy, I know you don’t like extremely elegant places,” he smiled, and the Grimm was happy to see that while it was still melancholic, it held a healthy amount of hope. “It’s a dinner. Maybe it will help us to see more clearly if we have anything we can build something on.”

“Dinner sounds great.”

“Whatever happens, Nick, just promise me one thing.”

“What is it?”

“That we won’t play any games. Not this time.”

Nick squeezed the hand in his, looking directly into green eyes.

“No games.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was very interesting to write because of a lot of reasons. Mostly because it forced Nick to think about things and to question himself, and to acknowledge his conclusions.  
> I know the answer, but I'd like to know what you think the reason for the ring still being with Nick was :D
> 
> Also, so excited because finally the series hiatus is over and we get a new episode tomorrow! Yay!


	13. Chapter 12: The Underwater Rose

**Chapter 12: The underwater Rose.**

 

 

If anyone asked Nick, Saturday evening was way too fast to arrive.

Standing with his hair still damp, clad in jeans and a t-shirt in the huge closet he shared with Renard, he had to repeat to himself that he was not feeling like a teen on prom day.

The day before had gone quite well, after they’d managed to stumble through the loaded conversation and eating half of their breakfast. Work had kept them both busy, Nick had given Hank vague answers when he asked about his relationship with their boss, and night had found him and Renard having takeout chicken and talking about trivialities until they’d both admitted they were too tired and headed straight to bed.

Sean himself had said that it was just dinner, and a good chance for them to start things over. The worst that could happen was that dinner would end up turning into a not-date dinner, they’d have to act like adults and professional cops, Nick would move out and they’d go on with their lives. Now, if things went well, they could start a real relationship and take things slowly.

“It’s nothing too formal, they don’t have a strict dressing code or anything. You don’t even have to wear a tie.”

Nick almost jumped out of his skin when he heard Sean’s voice behind him, just a few steps away. He looked over his shoulder and had to remind himself that he didn’t have to avert his eyes from Sean’s body anymore. He could, in fact, let them roam over the captain’s broad shoulders, the muscles of his powerful neck, the chiseled torso, the hard abs and the sharp hips that were covered by just a towel.

“Glad to see you approve,” Sean commented with a smug half smile as he stepped into the walk-in closet and went for his own clothes.

“Yeah,” he replied smartly, because it was one thing to appreciate his… boyfriend, and entirely another to shamelessly eat him up with his eyes. “So… no tie?” he asked, trying to will his skin to cool down and his blood to stop pooling into his lower belly.

“I wear one to work every day, a change would be good.”

“Uh huh,” and then he just grabbed a black suit and a formal shirt, because it was neutral but also most likely a safe choice for whatever kind of place they were going. “I’ll go change,” he said and most decidedly not ran out of there.

At the end, it took him longer to calm down than to get dressed, and it was somewhat relaxing to see that Sean wasn’t waiting for him downstairs yet. In fact, it took him a while longer than Nick would have expected, and he ended up taking a seat on an armchair.

A few minutes later, he heard the sound of footsteps on the stairs, and he turned to look at a pristinely dressed Sean Renard. Black tailored suit and crisp white shirt. It was technically the same thing he was wearing, but Nick got the impression that it looked nowhere near as good on him as it did on the captain, and not just because Sean’s suit was obviously of a superior quality.

“Wow,” he finally managed. “You look great.”

“So do you,” he smiled, and Nick had no difficulty returning it when he realized it might be the first time he saw the man smile in genuine pleasure, the gesture making his eyes spark.

“Where are we going, anyway?” he asked as they both exited the house and climbed into the car.

“The Underwater Rose.”

“Never been there.”

“It’s good enough.”

Just the area where the restaurant was located was enough to let Nick know it wasn’t as casual as Sean had led him to think. He was in the process of giving him a raised eyebrow after the valet had taken the car when he spotted a familiar face coming their way.

“Nick!” and Juliette looked great in a simple but elegant red dress, happily hanging from a blond guy’s arm.

“Juliette, hi,” and he didn’t need to be a detective to notice the way Sean tensed by his side, or how Juliette’s boyfriend visibly bristled when she let go of his arm to go and greet him with a kiss to the cheek. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Well, it’s a nice place to be out on a dinner date, isn’t it?” she turned towards her companion, smiling. “Dan, meet Nick Burkhardt and Sean Renard. They’re… friends of mine. Nick, Sean, this is Dan.”

“Hi,” the man gave them a tight smile as he evidently forced himself to come forward and shake Nick’s hand first.

Then he met Nick’s eyes with obvious unease. And he woged.

“Oh, God, a Grimm!” he choked, taking a few steps back and pulling Juliette behind him.

“What?!” Juliette demanded, trying to get the other veterinarian to meet her eyes.

“No, no, hey! I’m not… I mean, I am a Grimm. But it’s alright.”

“You’re a Grimm and you’re…” he turned to look at Juliette. “You know that he’s a Grimm?”

“Yes! And… wait, that means you… that you’re wesen?”

“I am,” he said, still shocked enough that he was keeping an eye on Nick. “And he’s…”

“Wait. No, hold on. Yes, Nick is a Grimm, but he’s not the kind of Grimm that just goes around killing every wesen he meets, alright? What’s more important now is why didn’t I know that you’re wesen? Why didn’t you tell me? How could I not know? What kind of wesen are you?”

“What? You’re… Well, I was going to tell you. Soon, actually. That’s why I wanted to watch all those silly werewolf movies lately. I was watching your reactions and waiting for the right time and…”

“Are you a blutbad?” she asked.

“Blutbad?!” and Dan sounded downright offended at the idea.

“He’s a fuchsbau,” Nick interrupted.

Then Sean decided the moment had gotten awkward enough for a pre-dinner chat and intervened.

“We’ll go ahead before they maître decides we won’t show up. It was a pleasure meeting you,” his smile was pure diplomacy. “Have a nice evening, Dan, Juliette,” and then, he was dragging Nick into the restaurant with a discrete hold onto his arm.

Nick was still a bit shocked as they were guided to their table and took their seats.

“I can’t believe Juliette is dating a fuchsbau.”

“And you’re dating a zauberbiest,” Sean commented dryly as he scanned the wine chart.

Nick turned to look at him, and his grey eyes softened immediately.

“Hey,” he said, resting a hand on Sean’s wrist, “I know that. I haven’t forgotten why I’m here. Or with whom. It was just a bit of a surprise.”

“Indeed. Who would have thought it? Of all the places in Portland…”

“Which reminds me,” he said, because talking about jealousy right then would for sure make things awkward. “I talked to Juliette the other day and she said her boyfriend had gotten reservations to a very nice place... which apparently was here. I thought you said it was somewhere casual,” he commented as he took in the expensive-looking place. The lighting was low and, along with the fine dark-wooden furniture, made for a refined and romantic atmosphere, which was complimented by the big pillar-shaped tanks, arranged with underwater rose gardens. It didn’t take a genius to know where the name of the place came from.

“It has a more relaxed atmosphere than other places I know. That doesn’t mean it can’t be good quality. I thought you might like it,” he gave his wine choice to the waiter.

“Oh, I like it,” he grinned, then he added, when the waiter was out of earshot. “I just might have to remember that royalty have different standards than the rest of us commoners.”

“It’s a good thing you didn’t see how much the wine is, then,” Sean said in a half-joking tone that had Nick debating on whether or not to ask. “Ah, it looks like your _friends_ aren’t splitting over that bit of truth after all.”

“Hm?” Nick turned around to see a smiling Juliette and her boyfriend being led to their table at another section of the restaurant. He couldn’t help but notice that the table he and Sean occupied was tactfully private without being cut off from the rest of the place. He had a feeling he really didn’t want to know how much all that would cost. “Well, I’m glad they seem to be figuring things out. But I hadn’t planned to let their problems distract me.”

“I’m happy to hear that,” he leaned towards him, and Nick found it wasn’t difficult at all to lean in as well, and to let their lips meet in a kiss that felt just right.

One and a half bottles of wine later, Nick was wondering why he’d ever thought things might go any other way that wasn’t perfectly fine. He’d wondered what they could talk about that wasn’t work-related or deadly-serious wesen business, and he’d found that talking to Sean about everything and anything was surprisingly easy. Sean told him about his fondness for art and music, and about how shocking it had been for him to start school in America after he’d had to flee Europe to avoid being murdered by his father’s wife. Nick had told him about what life was like when he was a young boy, and how many pieces seemed to fit together only after he’d learned the truth about his heritage; about how he’d had a pretty normal childhood after his parents had been presumed dead, and the kind of trouble he’d gotten into as a teenager.

By the time Sean handed his card to the waiter, Nick’s only worry was wondering how he could’ve known the man for years and managed to not know him at all. Sean had been secretive and discrete, playing the dangerous life-chess for most of his life, but still, Nick thought he should’ve noticed some other things about his captain. He was glad he was getting the chance this time around, and he looked forward to getting to know him better.

A conversation about crossbows took most of the drive back home, and Nick found himself honestly regretting that the night was about to end. He found himself looking out the French windows at the night city scape, the wine-induced warmth in his blood making him wonder how he could have been there for almost two weeks without noticing the view before.

Renard put some music on, and then walked to Nick, standing behind him close enough to be in his personal space, but far enough that they weren’t touching.

“You like it.”

“Yes,” Nick said, although it hadn’t been a question.

“This is my city,” he said as if he was showing it to a foreigner, with pride and possessiveness.

“I know,” the detective leaned back, and smiled when his body language was enough for Sean to step forward to cover the distance that separated them, allowing him to lean against him. “What made you choose Portland as your base? I like it, but it’s hardly the most glamourous city in America.”

“It’s more than a base. I meant to say, Portland is my territory. I don’t know how much you’re aware of, but there’s a lot of things that need to be controlled in a city. I do what I can without coming out and claiming it officially.”

“Like a kingdom?”

“Like my territory. It’s been my residence for a long time… but it’s been only recently that it truly feels like home,” he said right behind his ear, and then his lips were pressed against his neck, against his jaw…

Nick didn’t have to ask what he meant by that. He just turned around and wrapped his arms around Sean’s torso, looking into his eyes for a moment before leaning in for a kiss. The music changed slightly as a melody ended and a new one started.

“I like that song,” Renard declared.

“Uh huh,” Nick assented against his lips.

“Dance with me,” and his arms found their natural way around Nick’s torso, pulling him in, until Nick suddenly froze. “What’s the matter?”

The Grimm shook his head with a small laugh.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… I can’t do that.”

“Really? So you’ll have dinner in public with me, but won’t dance with me in private?”

“It sounds bad when you say it like that. But you know it’s different. I’m just not drunk enough for that,” and before Sean could protest, he pulled him into another kiss. This one started slow, and sweet, and Nick thought it was unfair that he had to pause to breathe.

Sean’s mouth moved to kiss his cheek, his jaw, his neck… then to nibble on his ear. He was vaguely aware of the hands pulling his shirt out of his waistband or his own fingers undoing the buttons; he was acutely aware of the captain’s hands on his warm skin, of his mouth kissing and sucking at his shoulder. He shifted his position slightly, just enough so he could work on removing Sean’s jacket and shirt, too. His fingers found the bastard prince’s hard muscles as fascinating as his eyes had earlier.

He kicked off his shoes, and when Sean pulled him closer, he shamelessly ground his hips against him. That earned him a growl, which reminded Nick that, even under a human guise, this man wasn’t human.

The hand that cupped him through his pants felt strangely familiar, but it still made his breath hitch, and he broke the kiss for a moment, just enough to register the couch behind his knees before they somehow managed to lie down on it without a graceless fall.

Feeling trapped between the supple couch and Sean’s strong body was a strange sensation, but not an unwelcomed one, and he arched his back, pressing up against him as his lips claimed Sean’s mouth again.

Skilled fingers unbuckled his belt and undid the button and zipper of his pants, and he had to part for breath when he felt them wrap around his hot flesh.

“Oh, god,” he moaned into Sean’s mouth. A distant part of his mind reminded him he’d meant to take things slowly, but it was nothing compared to the one that wanted to just feel closer to the prince.

Sean seemed to read his mind, and Nick wondered if that was a zauberbiest thing.

“I don’t think you want to,” the captain said against his mouth, voice low and rough, “but we can stop if you need to.”

“Are you kidding?” Nick managed with a choked laugh.

“Not at all,” he almost growled, abandoning his lips in favor of kissing his jaw and down his neck, then his collarbones and his chest.

The Grimm gasped as he felt Sean’s tongue playing with his nipples, and he wondered how long it’d been since he’d felt so turned on with just kisses and gentle nips over his body and an immobile hand around his cock. He wasn’t aware of the moment it happened, his body seeming to move on its own, spreading thighs to accommodate Sean’s legs between them. All his mind could register was the sensation of Sean nipping at his belly, then soothing the skin with his tongue, and then, without great preamble, his hot, wet mouth closing around his shaft.

Nick’s eyes shot open and he bent his neck to look at the captain, and he felt his mind break like glass at the image of Sean between his legs, eyes closed as he worked his cock with his experienced mouth. He shut his eyes tight and lied back on the couch, trying to focus on breathing and in not thinking too much that the night was proving to be a lot more enlightening than he’d expected. Dinner had been enough to prove that they could be at the very least close friends, most likely a lot more than that. This proved that his mind still had a way to go where erotic fantasies were concerned.

Sean’s tongue did something that made his hands go down to his head, trying to grab at hair that was too short for his grasp. It was pure torture, and Nick never wanted it to stop.

“Oh, god, Sean!” he choked out, thighs tense around strong, broad shoulders. “Stop! Stop or I’ll…”

Sean never stopped, he didn’t even slow down. Instead, he grabbed his hips with both hands, thumbs caressing the tense muscles as he continued to drive Nick crazy with his mouth.

Nick let out a strangled scream as he felt his release like an impact, blinding him for a moment with colored sparks and lighting all his nerve endings on fire. Sean continued to work him until the powerful waves of orgasm reduced him to a shivering mess and the contact threatened to become painful.

Sean rose over him on hands and knees to kiss him again, and the detective thought he could black out from lack of oxygen at any time. He could taste himself on Sean’s mouth, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel disgusted by it when it was a reminder of what exactly they’d been doing. His only regret was that, feeling like he did at the moment, like an old, worn rag, there was no way he could return the attention.

“You look gorgeous like this,” Sean said, and Nick grinned at him.

“Liar,” the Grimm responded without bite, and somehow managed to get a shaking hand into Sean’s pants. He couldn’t remember undoing the buckle or the zipper, but he wasn’t about to complain that he didn’t have to fumble with them at the moment. His fingers wrapped around Sean’s diamond-hard cock, relishing the velvety touch of his hot skin, and the way the taller man shivered above him when he started moving his hand.

Sean rested his forehead on Nick’s, locking his eyes with the Grimm’s grey ones, fisting his hands on the couch as they breathed in each other’s breath.

Nick drank in the beautiful sight of Sean’s eyes, with the green almost swallowed up by the black of his pupils, the sound of his broken breathing and the delicious way his strong body seemed to come apart at the firm stroking of his fingers. Sean was shaking, and Nick wrapped an arm around the taller man’s waist to keep him close to himself. He felt the tension build up in the prince’s back, and the darkness in his eyes told him when he was about to go over the edge. He showed him no mercy.

“Nick…” Sean gasped out, and then he was coming undone as the Grimm kept on touching him with the same strong, maddening rhythm; he was shooting his seed all over Nick’s hand and between their bodies.

Nick watched in fascination as emotions and sensations swirled in his green eyes like a kaleidoscope. _I love you_ , he thought, and he crushed his lips against the prince’s mouth to prevent the words from taking form. It felt like a very real possibility, but it was too soon, and he didn’t want to cheapen the words.

For what felt like forever, they just lied there, tangled limbs in what was decidedly too small a space, enjoying the simple contact of bare skin on bare skin. Nick was aware that they couldn’t stay there for the rest of the night, and that the mess between them needed to be cleaned up, but at the moment, he was simply fascinated by the way the lights that came in from the French windows played with the curly texture of Sean’s short hair. He allowed himself to enjoy the sensation of his breathing against his neck, the lips that every now and then pressed a kiss against his shoulder and the long fingers tracing nonsensical patterns on whatever skin he could reach.

“Next time you start questioning my moral gradient,” Sean said after a long time, “I’ll gladly remind you of what you will and won’t do when only slightly drunk.”

“Really?” he chuckled.

“Just you wait. See if I don’t,” he shifted, just enough to kiss his lips again, and Nick felt himself return the small smile he was given. “We should move to the bed.”

“Do we have to?”

“I think so. Unless you want to be sore all over tomorrow.”

“I don’t feel like moving, though.”

“I can carry you.”

“I bet you can.”

Sean sighed and, evidently forcing himself to move, got up from the couch, leaving Nick’s skin exposed to the cool air.

“Move, or I will carry you to bed,” the tone was strangely similar to the one Nick was used to hearing at the precinct, and he shifted just enough to look at him. The raised eyebrow was serious as well, but something in his eyes gave up his amusement.

“Like hell you will,” the detective responded, and he just reached up with a hand for Sean to pull him up.

Sean smirked, then pulled him out of the couch and into his arms in a single movement.

Nick wasn’t sure when Sean had picked up his expensive white shirt, and if he was honest with himself, he felt content to just let himself be wiped mostly clean with it.

“Won’t that ruin it?” he commented, rather lazily.

“The dry-cleaning can deal with it.”

Climbing the stairs towards the master bedroom was easier than he’d expected, and after that, falling into bed with Sean felt simply natural.

“I love you,” Sean said.

Nick smiled, and kissed his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I certainly enjoyed writing it :3  
> So, yes, huge changes for everyone involved, and we're still far from the end.
> 
> I apologize in advance, because next week I'll be on vacations and unable to post the update. However, the week after everything goes back to normal. In the next chapter, a new plot point will be introduced, and it will open what I think will be the last arc in this story. Worry not, though! I have a few ideas for other fics, and even for a few shorts that might happen in the same universe as SR.
> 
> Thanks for all the reads, kudos and, of course, comments!


	14. Chapter 13: Slow

**Chapter 13: Slow.**

 

 

Waking up slowly, without an alarm or an insistent phone ring shattering his sleep, was a rare luxury, one that Nick greatly appreciated, but hadn’t been able to enjoy after he’d woken up in what he’d come to think of as the new reality. He smiled as he mentally contrasted that morning with the one almost two weeks before, when he’d been shocked to find someone not Juliette next to him in bed. This time, he just relaxed, enjoying the warm closeness even as his mind started questioning him. Whatever had happened to taking things slowly?

Dinner had gone a lot better than he’d expected, even disregarding the decidedly teenage-like sex, and he couldn’t bring himself to regret anything from the previous evening. Maybe he’d let things get physical a lot sooner than he’d intended, but like Juliette had said, it had been a special date, so maybe they could just let that be a part of that, right? As nice as it was waking up next to Sean, that didn’t mean they had to keep sleeping together from that moment onwards. They could take a step back and not rush things. Maybe that would be the best thing to do, especially if, contraire to what his gut was telling him, the relationship with Renard failed… if they just kept on sleeping together, it would definitely make things more awkward than they needed to be.

He sighed, and apparently Sean had been awake already and keeping himself still in order to not wake him, because he seemed to take that as a sign to move and press a soft kiss against his temple.

“Good morning, Nick.”

The Grimm stretched before answering, letting the other man wrap his arms around him and pull him closer.

“Good morning.”

Sean busied himself nuzzling Nick’s hair, so the detective just applied his mouth to the collarbone that was now conveniently close to his face.

“Definitely good,” Renard moaned, burying his long fingers in Nick’s hair to tilt his head backwards, separating his lips from his skin and freeing them to be kissed.

Nick’s hands went to rest on Sean’s shoulder and neck, and he felt the captain’s free hand close between his legs, bringing his morning wood to full hardness in a matter of seconds. With the remains of any thoughts about not rushing things flying out the window, Nick let his thighs fall open, allowing the other man easier access to his body.

As he briefly broke the kiss for breath, Nick’s brain seemed to realize that he didn’t have to hold back, that he had Sean right there, warm, willing, and breathtakingly beautiful. From that point on, he couldn’t keep his hands to himself, and instead let them roam the perfectly sculpted flesh of his lover’s body. He felt a rush of warmth at thinking of Sean in those terms.

Any reservations he felt evaporated in the hot touch of skin on skin, and his hand was firm and steady as it wrapped around Sean’s hardness, working the hot flesh with the same skill he handled the familiar metal of his gun. He took advantage of the maleness of his lover, knowing full well what he liked himself, and he broke the kiss to look at his face as he flicked his thumb over the swollen tip.

Sean’s eyes flew wide open for a moment in something akin to shock, his gasp for breath and the way his hand seemed to freeze for a moment, sent a shudder down Nick’s back. He took in that sight for a longer moment, then moved to kiss his mouth again. There was no way he could be sure about it, of course, but he highly doubted that Sean was the kind of man to easily get involved with someone, much less let them into his bed, and the certainty that he had total freedom to kiss and touch him, to conquer his mouth with his own and tear him apart with pleasure… it was too intense, and Nick had to close his eyes tightly to try to control himself, to make it last a little longer.

“Nick!”

The way Sean said his name, in a voice that seemed tortured with pure ecstasy, combined with the full-body shudder of the prince’s figure pressed against him, with the strong grip that turned even stronger on his manhood, and in an instant, Nick felt his own orgasm hit him like a powerful wave, and for a moment, he could only feel the pleasure coursing through his body like an electric current. Then he fell against Sean, boneless, with his hot breath against his ear.

After what seemed like an eternity listening only to his own heartbeat and Sean’s harsh breath mixing with his own, he felt the prince’s lips gently press against his brow.

 _This I could definitely get used to_ , he thought. Taking things slowly didn’t seem as appealing as it had seemed just twenty-four hours prior, and he had to laugh at his own lack of self-restraint.

“What is it?” Sean asked, sounding amused.

“I was just thinking that… we were supposed to take things slowly.”

Sean didn’t made any brusque movements, but Nick felt him tense against him.

“Do you regret it?” he asked after a long silence.

Nick knew that the answer was more complex than anything he could say immediately, but he didn’t want Sean to get worried or upset, so he hurried to say something.

“No,” and maybe it was too fast an answer, because Sean pulled away, just so he could look him in the eye. “Look, I don’t regret being with you. I want that to be perfectly clear.”

“Then what it is?”

“It’s exactly that. I… I’m not sure we should have this conversation right now. Or right here,” he gave him a half shrug.

“It’s fine,” he said, caressing the side of Nick’s face with his clean hand, gentle and comforting. “If it’s something important, we should talk about it.”

The Grimm took a deep breath.

“I don’t think you want to be hearing about her…” _in our bed_ sounded wrong, but if he just said _the bed_ , it might hit a sensitive nerve, so he fumbled for the right words, “here,” he managed, a gesture of his hand enclosing the both of them, the bed, the room and the whole situation. “But it’s… Juliette told me why we couldn’t work things out, how all the secrets ruined things between us.” He felt Sean tense against him, his eyes filling with shadows again, so he didn’t pause, needing to get it all out and make it clear before he could overthink it and ruin things with silence and brooding. “And losing her was not easy. So I guess it’s… I want this thing between us to work. For real. So maybe I’m just a little afraid that rushing it might… destroy it.”

“I’d say we can still take things slow, since I don’t think that means the same for us as it does for the rest of people. We are not teenagers deciding on whether to sleep together or not. We can make love like we enjoy doing… or we can give ourselves the physical space, if you feel that’s what we need. That won’t change the way we decide to… approach, the rest of it. I want to trust you, Nick, like I trusted you already. Implicitly. And I want you to trust me the same way. So I’m actually glad you decided to talk to me about this directly. That… that sounds like the way we should proceed, I believe.”

Nick turned his head to press his lips against Sean’s fingers.

“That sounds…” he hesitated. “Good. Very good, actually. But I can’t help feeling that’s kind of unfair. Like I’m forcing you through some…”

“You’re not forcing me to do anything.”

“Maybe you’re being more patient with me than you should be.”

“I can be very patient when it’s necessary. That’s a virtue I acquired the hard way, but it has proved to be good for my life, when the occasion’s worth it. Like right now,” he paused. “I’m doing this for the both of us, you know? I’ve had almost two weeks to watch you after the whole… incident. I do love you. And you might not remember a few things, but you’re the same man I fell in love with. I certainly think this is worth being patient for.”

“Thank you.”

Sean chuckled.

“I will tell you what you said to me, when I was unable to do anything but breathe…” his smile was amused, with a hint of something else. “Because of the bullet wounds and the drugs. And you were there every minute you weren’t forced to go follow up on a case.”

Nick just smiled at him, feeling relieved that apparently he hadn’t been a hopeless jerk with him. If what he’d seen so far was any indicator, Sean more than deserved that kind of loyalty from him.

“What did I say?”

“That there was no reason to thank you because you were being selfish. That you were just taking care of what was yours.”

The Grimm felt his face warm a bit.

“And… you were ok with that?”

Sean pretended to consider his answer for a bit, his thumb toying with the corner of Nick’s mouth.

“Only because you happen to be a handsome and powerful Grimm.”

“Just for that?”

“It does make you useful,” he smiled one of those rare, wide smiles that Nick found himself quickly getting fond of. He leaned forward to kiss his lips.

Sean let him explore his mouth for a while, but kept the kiss slow and gentle. When they parted for air, he briefly turned to retrieve a handkerchief from the side table’s drawer. Pushing the comforter off their bodies, he cleaned them both up as best as was possible without a shower. Nick took advantage of the removed cover and shamelessly devoured Sean’s body with his eyes, not moving a finger to help.

“Who the hell uses handkerchiefs anymore?” Nick wondered aloud, and then teasingly asked Sean: “Is that a royalty thing?”

“It’s a gentleman thing. You wouldn’t understand it… barbarian,” he answered with an arched brow, letting the handkerchief fall to the floor.

Nick laughed, kissed him again, considered getting up and decided against it, instead shifting his position to rest snuggly against Sean’s side.

“Do you have any plans for the day, your Highness?”

Sean laughed, too, and Nick had to grin at the way the laughter made his eyes spark.

“I didn’t expect you to call me that right now.”

“Is that something I don’t usually do?”

“Not too often. Just every now and then… usually in bed.”

“Oh, then it’s appropriate.”

“It is,” he messed Nick’s hair up some more with his fingers. “And to answer your question, I did, in fact, have plans for us. But given the circumstances… I wouldn’t be against just staying in bed all day. Maybe a quick incursion to the bathroom later… or to go get water from the kitchen…”

“We’d need food at some point.”

“We can order from that Thai place you like,” he nuzzled his ear. Nick let out a small laugh, then he froze.

“Wait,” Nick said as he sat up in bed. How could that have escaped him before? How could he have not thought about it?

“What is it?” Sean asked with badly masked alarm.

“You said we had dinner from that place the night before the change. Wasn’t that…?”

The captain visibly relaxed, even as he sat up, resting one hand on the mattress.

“We ate the same thing,” he started to explain.

“But we’re not exactly the same, are we? You’re a zauberbiest, I’m a Grimm. There’s bound to be a lot of things that affect me but you’re immune to.”

“And the other way around, too. But we already know what actually happened, as my mother explained to you.”

“Still, that’s one thing we should look into, don’t you think?”

Sean looked at him for a moment, long enough to make Nick feel uncomfortable.

“The possibility didn’t escape me. So I had a few of my people look into it. Everything was clean. If there was any influence other than the time drifter, it had nothing to do with the restaurant.”

“So you did look into it.”

“I did.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Sean’s subtle, barely-there smile was more like the ones Nick was used to seeing in him. It wasn’t exactly comforting. What had that been about trusting each other? If things weren’t so serious in his life at the moment, he would have laughed at the irony of it. Was it just him or were things moving stupidly fast for him these last few days?

“The short answer would be, because there was nothing relevant to know and you had enough in your plate already.”

“Uh huh…” Nick said, because that made sense. “And the long answer is…?”

“It was a dead end, our energies would be better used focused on finding a real answer… and there are some things that you prefer not to hear about.”

It was Nick’s turn to stare at him for a few seconds.

After the silence he’d kept trying to protect Juliette from a world that was a lot stranger and scarier than he’d thought as a simple cop, this felt a little too much like poetic justice. He had to wonder if there really was no external influence at work there.

“I don’t know if that’s changed for me from one life to another… but I’ve never considered ignorance to be a blessing.”

Sean’s next words showed that he at least knew his mental processes quite well.

“It’s not that I keep you in the dark about what goes on in the city. But protecting Portland from the shadows entails some things that you’re not exactly comfortable with.”

“So you keep your underground operations a secret,” Nick said, trying for a neutral tone.

“No,” he said, with a calm Nick was surprised he didn’t find unsettling. “We agreed not to keep secrets, and some important things happen in this city that you really need to be aware of. So I let you know what is going on, but I spare you some details.”

“And the fact that you investigated a potential answer is a little detail?”

“Perhaps not, but it became a little irrelevant as there was nothing out of order with the place or the people that own or work at the restaurant. I got confirmation that the place was clean a little before my mother came to Portland. There was no occasion to tell you about it, and then we learned what had actually happened.”

Nick settled down, feeling guilty all over again about the way he’d made Renard feel like he didn’t care that he’d actually died, even if it had been just a moment, since he could tell that was the time Sean was referring to but was avoiding to be more specific. The cop in him still pushed for another answer.

“So it wasn’t that you kept it from me because of any… gruesome details, right?”

“It didn’t come to that,” Sean said, visibly relaxing at Nick’s own tone. “If it had, I wouldn’t have suggested that we order from that place.”

Nick blinked. Was that supposed to be reassuring? The words weren’t, but the hand caressing his forearm sure was, so he just shut his mouth before Sean could make any comments about fly-catching or fish impressions.

With the lazily romantic mood of earlier broken, they finally made it out of bed and into the shower. The Grimm couldn’t help a smile as Sean moved in the kitchen, cooking for both of them without asking for his help like it was the most natural thing in the world, like he’d never stopped doing it to make a point. Nick found he liked to just perch on a stool and watch him cook. He wasn’t useless in the kitchen, and he liked to cook every now and then, or at least help, but right now, it was easy to enjoy the situation, to watch Sean go through mundane and domestic activities, to get in touch with the man that was also police captain, old world royalty, underworld prince, powerful zauberbiest, resistance leader, among many other things. In a way, he found the simpler side of him even more fascinating than the other ones.

Sean’s cell interrupted a conversation about expensive bed clothes, and Nick was surprised by the ease with which Sean went from one language to another. He knew a few French words, but nothing that gave him even a slight idea of what the phone call was about. The way his face closed up, becoming the stoic mask he usually wore, told him it was serious, though.

He didn’t need to ask what it was about when Sean hung up. He just looked at Sean, and he volunteered the answer to the silent question.

“That was Pavel, one of my contacts in Europe.”

“And I’m guessing it wasn’t exactly good news.”

“No, it wasn’t,” Sean confirmed, leaving a plate of toast on the island. “Emil Steiner was killed yesterday. They found him in his house, with obvious signs of torture.”

“I assume that’s one of your allies?”

“He was an important member of the resistance. I believe he was trustworthy, but torture can break even some of the toughest people. Aside from any secrets he might have revealed, we have other problems,” he paused, separating the cut fruit in two portions and serving them in bowls. “Steiner was a businessman, owner of a big company and stockholder in a few others. His support granted the Laufer a lot of resources we couldn’t count on otherwise.”

“And now they’re lost for good?”

“It’s uncertain. He has a brother who’s supposed to support the resistance, but I’m not sure he can be trusted. Emil has a son and a daughter, but they’re very young. The boy is barely sixteen, and the girl is even younger.”

“So that means you really can’t count on that source anymore,” the detective took the plate of eggs from Sean’s hands. “Thanks.”

“Unless they’re involved in this already,” he took his customary seat and picked up his fork. “Some people get involved at a really young age.”

“You’re dragging them in,” Nick said, more than asked.

“That might not be necessary if they’re already up to speed. God knows some of us have no option but to get involved a lot sooner than we would’ve liked.”

Nick ate his breakfast in silence for a few moments, the wheels in his head spinning.

“How young were you? When you got involved in… you know, all that?”

Sean gave him a lopsided, mirthless smile.

“You could say I got involved before I was born… from the moment I was conceived, actually. Being born in the place and position where I was guaranteed that I wouldn’t be able to escape that fate,” he ate a few more forkfuls. “Maybe the side I’d take was decided when I was thirteen.”

“You had some kind of big problem with your family then?”

“You could say that. My existence was barely tolerated during my childhood, and the few attempts to kill me were always frustrated,” he didn’t pause as Nick gave him a slightly incredulous look. “My mother’s contacts found out that my father’s wife would make a much more… aggressive, attempt to get us out of the way. I was pulled out of school in the middle of French literature class, then my mother and I were in the hands of the Laufer, fleeing the country for our lives with just the clothes on our backs. It was all pretty dramatic.”

The detective refrained from commenting how much that sounded like the argument of some action movie. He guessed in a lot of ways, Sean’s life was actually more intense than many works of fiction.

“I guess my mother’s fake death was not that bad, after all.”

Sean seemed surprised by that declaration, but like always, he seemed to know just what to say.

“Both our mothers made great sacrifices to keep us alive. It’s another thing we have in common.”

“I guess it is.” Which brought up another thing, and Nick’s brows furrowed as his mind went somewhere else. “By the way, do we know where my mother is?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience and the good wishes!
> 
> I had a good vacation, short as it was, and I thoroughly enjoyed it ^^
> 
> Also, thank you, as always, for all the reads, comments, kudos, bookmarks, etc.! They mean a lot to me!  
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter, which includes hints for the next arc :D


	15. Chapter 14.

**Chapter 14.**

 

 

It was just another proof of his life’s weirdness that hearing that his mother was still on the move, keeping Diana safe and being impossible to locate or reach, was actually comforting. At least that hadn’t really changed from what he remembered. Afterwards, Sunday went on in a surprisingly normal way that included ordering food from the Thai place, an old movie Nick had never heard about that had been also surprisingly good, popcorn and a lot of making out on the couch. A question remained on the back of the detective’s mind all day, even as made up his mind and followed Sean to the master bedroom.

The prince looked briefly at him, then smiled to himself and didn’t say a word as he undressed for bed, wearing only pajama pants that Nick decidedly didn’t stare at as he took care of his own clothes.

Sean pulled him close as soon as he was lying on the bed, wrapping his arms around him, as if to prevent him from fleeing.

“Glad you decided not to return to the guest bedroom.”

Nick grinned.

“I didn’t really see the point,” and the closeness was just making him surer that he’d made the right decision. His own arms went around Sean’s body, and he found the warmth very much welcome.

He didn’t resist the kiss that followed, and when it became long but never too heated, he was grateful for Sean’s self-restraint.

“What is it?”

“What?” Nick asked smartly, his blood a nice warmer-than-usual temperature.

“Whatever it is you’ve been wanting to ask me all day.”

“Oh,” and he had to think for a few seconds before he could remember what the hell it had been. Then he finally remembered. “I was just wondering, you know… if my mother knows about this.”

“You and me, you mean?”

“Yeah.”

Sean seemed to think about it for a short moment.

“It is something we have never openly discussed before, but we weren’t exactly hiding when we went to rescue Diana from my cousin. So I’d say it’s safe to assume she knows.”

“Oh,” he repeated. “Well, if she didn’t say anything at the time, then I guess it’s alright.”

“I’m not sure if she said anything to you. I didn’t exactly have a long conversation with her before she took off.”

“And if we did, I don’t remember it…” he added.

“We’ll be fine.”

Nick decided not to say that they might not be if his mother decided she wanted to lop Sean’s head off. The captain seemed to read his mind.

“There’s a lot of things going on right now. Killing me wouldn’t benefit anyone but the royal families, which would work against the Laufer and everything your mother’s been working so hard for. So I doubt that would be her move, even she wanted me dead for personal reasons.”

The Grimm’s head turned so fast to look at him, he almost gave himself whiplash.

“Thank you, that’s very, very reassuring.”

Sean just gave him something that somehow managed to be both a smile and a smirk at the same time.

“If there is something I’ve learned about you in all this time, it’s that you don’t need to be told sweet lies. You’re a hands-on type of guy… which might be a good side effect of your being a Grimm.”

Nick just looked at him for a moment, wheels spinning in his head.

“Is this something we do?” he asked, finally. “Have this kind of conversations?”

Long, elegant fingers caressed the Grimm’s face, and he found himself leaning onto the contact.

“Sometimes. This thing between us… it didn’t start as it is now, and the change didn’t happen overnight. We had a hard time learning to trust each other for real,” he kept caressing Nick’s cheek and jaw, even as his eyes looked away for a moment. “I had a hard time allowing myself to have feelings for you. Admitting it was even harder,” he paused, visibly considering whether to say what was really on his mind or not. “You knew that as well. And so we sometimes tell each other this kind of thing. What we like about each other, all the reasons we trust each other with our lives…”

Nick felt his mouth slightly dry, and he felt a shudder crawl down his back. It had been one thing to hear it from Juliette, but hearing from Renard himself how they had chosen ­­–and apparently succeeded– to deal with communication, was a bit more than he was entirely comfortable with at the moment.

 _Well, perhaps that’s what drove you apart from Juliette,_ he thought _, not having the balls to talk about certain things._

That that cowardice had apparently led to him being with Sean was something that threatened to be way too complex to think about while lying in bed next to Renard on a Sunday night.

He could almost see the moment when Renard decided not to interrogate him about what was obviously going on in his head.

“Good night, Nick,” he said before pressing another kiss to his mouth, and the subtle smile on his lips when he withdrew was tinted with sadness.

“Good night,” he replied, almost on reflex.

 

***

Nick woke up to a kiss being pressed against his face, and he had a moment to freak out about everything for just an instant, before he remembered that he had, somehow, miraculously, managed to work things out and his life was apparently starting to make sense again. Even if the sense it made right now was completely different to what he’d been used to.

“Good morning,” Sean said softly into his ear.

The Grimm shuddered, then he stretched his muscles as he tried to work his eyes open.

“Good morning,” he answered, and by then his brain was awake enough that he actually noticed how Sean’s voice didn’t sound sleepy at all, while his was barely understandable. Life wasn’t fair.

Sean looked amused when Nick was done rubbing his eyes and finally looked at him, giving him a subtle but real smile that the detective was fast learning Sean reserved for him. It was a humbling privilege, and Nick wondered how many others found themselves on the receiving side of such gestures.

“I have a phone conference at ten thirty and then I have to head out for a meeting with the Mayor, but there’s a few things I want to get done before that, so I need to be at the office early today.”

Nick nodded, still trying to make his brain go through the startup process.

“We’re mostly done with work, for now. Hank and I are going to go over a few leads we had on the case of the guy they found in the river… but honestly, we don’t think we’ll find anything new.”

“Sad as it is, sometimes cases just can’t be solved despite our best efforts.”

The Grimm gave his lover an amused smile that was almost a grin.

“Trying to soothe the frustration?”

“Keeping my men’s morale up is something of a habit. Especially that of my best elements,” Sean said in a tone that didn’t match the amused gleam in his eyes as he finally forced himself to let go of the detective and get out of bed and into the shower.

Nick had a good few minutes to just stare at the high ceiling while going through the weekend’s events. Things had certainly changed in just a couple of days, and he had to admit that, despite all his earlier doubts, they all felt like good changes. It scared him a little.

Sean came out of the shower in a cloud of delicious-smelling aftershave and masculine cologne, and for a moment Nick couldn’t decide which was more appealing, the scent or the nice sight of the zauberbiest wearing nothing but a towel around his hips. A small laugh escaped his lips as something occurred to him.

“What is it?” Sean said, somehow managing to make the simple process of getting dressed an elegant and enticing affair.

“I just thought that it’s good that I don’t have to choose,” he said after a pause.

“Choose? Between what?” the Captain asked.

“Nothing.”

Sean gave him a raised eyebrow, his movements still graceful as he efficiently dressed himself.

“Between seeing you and smelling you,” Nick admitted, because it was way too early to come up with a half decent explanation for anything.

“It’s good to see you this relaxed, at least,” he said, a mock serious tone in his voice. Then he knotted his tie in a way that made it obvious that practice had made it as easy as breathing for him. He shrugged on his jacket and, in a just a few minutes, had managed to look good enough for any high-end magazine. If Nick hadn’t had the benefit of having him all to himself, he would have complained –again– about the unfairness of life. Sean leaned down over the bed to kiss his lips. “I still expect you to hand in paperwork on time, regardless of how beautiful you are.” And the low tone of his voice made it hard to know how serious he really was.

“I always finish my paperwork,” Nick protested, mostly on principle.

“Yes, but barely on time.”

“Still on time.”

“Barely,” Sean insisted and, giving him one more kiss, he straightened up. “See you later.” And then, he was gone.

Nick took advantage of the solitude and quiet to go over the disgustingly domestic scene in his mind, and somehow managed to convince himself that he was totally not the girl in that relationship.

***

Later, Nick walked into the precinct working on his second cup of coffee. He tried his best to ignore the knowing look Hank had fixed him with as soon as he’d stepped into their work space.

“Shut up,” he said, finally.

“I’m not saying anything,” Hank said, hands raised in a disclaiming gesture.

“But I am,” said Wu, seemingly materializing out of nowhere to lean his hip on the edge of Nick’s desk. “The Captain’s mood was particularly bright this morning. Not that anyone’s going to complain, but it’s hard not to notice.”

“I don’t see any difference,” Nick said, trying for firmness.

“That’s because you’re blinded by love,” Wu added, sounding way too happy for the Grimm’s comfort. “It’s good that you two finally sorted things out. I was starting to worry it would affect everyone’s performance. At the office,” he helpfully clarified.

Hank tried to mask his laugh as a cough and only half-succeeded.

Nick glared at him.

“Don’t we have any work to do?”

“Sadly, we do,” the sergeant said, handing them the contents of the folder he has carrying. “As entertaining as it is to poke fun at people who have actual love lives, we have a report that just came in. Female, late teens to early twenties, no IDs on her, apparently died of an overdose.”

Nick took the file a bit too eagerly.

“That’s some signs of rough play,” Hank commented as he took in the pictures of the dead girl.

“Forced overdose, from the looks of it. I always said that nothing good could come from that Fifty shades of crap thing,” Wu commented.

“Or young people’s general lack of self-preservation instincts,” Hank said as he stood up and grabbed his coat.

“Combine the two and this is what you get,” the sergeant said with his usual detachedness. “Who thought it was a good idea to publish that crap, anyway? And then make it into a movie, for those teens that our impeccable education system failed to teach how to read.”

The Grimm shook his head, trying not to grin at Wu’s comments as he took his coat and got moving.


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15.**

 

The crime scene didn’t offer a lot more than the sergeant had told them… at least, not for the kehrseite technicians. For the expert group, it was another thing altogether.

Hank, Wu and Nick squatted down beside the body.

“That’s some mean bruises,” Hank commented on the ugly purple marks around the woman’s shoulders, neck and jaw. Even with all the desensitization fruit of years working with murder on an almost daily basis, every now and then Hank found he hadn’t gotten used to all the ugly things humans –and humanoids– were capable of. On this particular case, it looked like the photographs they’d seen before had been rather bad, since the bruising was a lot worse in person than it was in the pictures.

“And I’d bet those,” Wu said as he pointed at the claw marks in her torso, “weren’t exactly made by some wild animal. Well, not the kind that you’d find in a wildlife encyclopedia.”

“Encyclopedia? I didn’t think anyone still kept those.”

“Encyclopedia, Wikipedia, whatever. I did love those colorful animal books as a kid, though. Didn’t you all?”

Nick gave Wu a look, which of course didn’t affect the sergeant one bit.

“There’s some hair in her fingers.”

They all took a closer look. It appeared to be animal hair.

“I doubt that will match her dog’s, either,” Nick said as he collected a sample in a small bag.

“Will you take that sample to Juliette?”

The Grimm looked at Hank, almost in alarm.

“Should I?”

“That’s what we usually do,” the older detective shrugged, gently reminding Nick that things were still a bit different than what he remembered.

“Oh. Then I guess I will,” and he collected a second sample, which he discretely pocketed.

“Are we sure the cause of death isn’t the beating?” Hank grimaced.

“We can’t be sure until we get the forensics report, but there are clear signs of overdose. Plus, look at all this bruising here and here. That might be where someone…”

“Or some _thing_ ,” Wu pointed out.

“Held her to force her to take more of the drug. I’m assuming that’s what the white powder around her nose is.”

“Either that or she really loved the smell of powdered mini donuts,” Wu paused and just smiled at the dark looks they shot his way. Then, he stood up. “Pastry and a coffee on the way back to the precinct, anyone?”

***

His facial expression was nothing but pure professionalism, and his body language, the most refined diplomacy. But the truth was that, beneath all the pleasantries and efficiency, Sean Renard simply and thoroughly hated paperwork. Of course he couldn’t say that aloud, not in front of the personnel under his command, since he was always demanding everything was neatly done and filed, but it was undeniable. Nick had once gotten him to admit it, and he’d teased him with it for almost two weeks afterwards.

A subtle smile graced the corner of his mouth at the memory. Maybe he’d get to enjoy it all over again if he ever told that to his new Nick.

His hatred of paperwork and the reports he had to hand in to his superiors weren’t enough to dissolve his good mood of the day, even as the meeting extended for almost an hour over the programmed schedule. Things were finally seeming to get back on track with Nick, and not even the crude attempts at politics of these poor excuses of bureaucrats were not enough to put a damper on the sheer happiness he felt. Because that much he could admit –if only to himself–, he hadn’t felt so genuinely happy in a long time. Well, maybe the moment when Nick had agreed to move in with him was a close second, but if he was honest with himself, he hadn’t had great doubts about it. After all, they had already spent so much time at each other’s places, and Nick’s bachelor apartment didn’t come anywhere close to his fancy house.

Sheer skill allowed him to offer his input at the meeting even long after he’d tuned everyone out, and he managed to endure the rest of the meeting in unusually good spirits, which meant he didn’t have to make the huge effort to mask the exasperation he often felt at these meetings. One of the upsides of growing up in the vipers’ nest that was his father’s court, was that diplomacy came as natural as breathing to him. Even more so when the conditions were as easy as they were in the New World’s form of democracy.

The meeting was finally over, and Sean could see this group would try to get him to join them for lunch, each for different reasons. Carpenter and Hills would use that time to try and get him on their side; the Mayor would want him there to use him as a shield against the other two. But even his good mood wasn’t enough to make him volunteer to such a psychological torture, so he was getting ready to decline with a smile and a dose of charm when it all went to hell.

He caught sight of the gun before the man shot, and he was already ducking and pushing people out of the way as he got his own gun out, adrenaline and training kicking in to make him react fast enough that the first shot barely grazed his shoulder, the second one missing him completely and the third hitting some random man in a suit. The man knew he had fucked up, and he turned tail and ran, evidently hoping that the screaming and the sheer chaos in the hallway would give him a head start. It did, actually, but Sean was simply faster.

He had almost caught up to the man when the second shooter came out of his hiding place, opening fire in his general direction with a total disregard for the surrounding crowd. Even from across the street, he could see a hint of the tattoo on the man’s palm, so he didn’t hesitate, took aim and shot a single time. The man grunted an inhuman sound that could only be hundjager, and then dropped like sack of sand to the ground.

Not wasting time on the fallen man, Sean turned to keep on pursuing the first shooter. The guy, dressed in black and dark gray, wasn’t that hard to spot, running down the street like the hounds of Hell were after him. Maybe there wasn’t that much of a difference.

Sean ran after him, silently cursing the fancy long coat that slowed him down and the blood that ran down his left arm even as he decided to ignore its origin. The man turned around, shot twice, but the running was evidently taking its toll on him and both bullets went wild, not getting even close to him or anyone else, then he continued running… directly into traffic.

Sean had to hand it to the driver, he had good reflexes; but it wasn’t enough to avoid the running man, who was violently hit by the delivery truck. A few vehicles managed to avoid the chaos, but a few others were unable to stop or maneuver fast enough and impacted each other.

The Captain didn’t put his gun away until he was close enough to be sure that the man was dead, and that there was nobody else with him, at least not around. Holstering his gun, he pulled up his badge and shouted at the bystanders to back away.

It was only when he tried to pull his cellphone out with his left hand that he felt the pain for the first time. Letting out an angry hiss that maybe wasn’t entirely human, he put away his badge and pulled out his phone to ring the precinct.

“This is Captain Renard. We had a shooting at the City Hall, the two shooters are down, possibly dead; at least one officer and one civilian were injured. Officer’s wound is not mortal, I’m unsure about the civilian,” he looked down and saw a lot more blood than he had expected soaking almost the entirety of his left sleeve. “Yes, that would be me.”

He leaned down towards the man that was definitely dead, staring up at the sky with half his body still under the delivery truck that had hit him. He felt sorry for the truck driver, who was apparently on the verge of a nervous collapse at having run someone over. Not so much for the scum that had shot at him, and even less when he pushed the gun off his hand and confirmed what he already suspected.

“Verrat,” he said to himself, gritting his teeth.

The voice on the phone rose to a worried shout when he didn’t answer for a second too many.

“Yes, yes, I am here. I’m perfectly conscious, the bullet just grazed me. I was… dealing with the situation here,” he paused, looking around him and noticing with relief the sirens coming his way. The cold part of his mind, the one that had allowed him to survive time and again in the most unlikely circumstances, went ahead of the questions that would undoubtedly be asked and gave him the perfect excuse to explain what the hell had just happened. “It looks like we just had an assassination attempt against the Mayor.”

***

Nick had driven to the animal hospital following Juliette’s instructions to meet her there, since the clinic she worked at lacked the equipment for the analysis Nick needed her to conduct. He remembered she had once or twice gone to a friend of hers when she needed more advanced equipment for sample analysis, though he’d never gone with her. It maybe because of that that he was surprised to see Juliette and Daniel when he got there, both wearing lab coats and looking maybe a bit too comfortable around each other.

Dan woged briefly when Nick approached them and extended his hand in greeting. The fuchsbau managed to get himself under control again and shake his hand after gulping.

“You’re not still nervous about Nick, are you?” Juliette said, her smile bright and just a tiny bit amused.

“About your Grimm ex-boyfriend? No, why should I?” was the other vet’s answer, and Nick grudgingly accepted that he knew what it was that Juliette saw in him.

“I’m seriously not the kind of Grimm that goes around chopping off heads.”

“Ah. Good.”

“Unless you hurt my friends. And that includes Juliette, of course.”

Dan actually grinned at that, and Nick had to admit to himself that he kind of liked the guy.

“Then we really have nothing to worry about,” he exchanged a quick look and a smile with Juliette, and Nick wondered if they’d ever done that with each other, that quick and silent communication. “This way,” he said, and led the way to the lab.

Once there, Nick got out the small hair sample and handed it to Dan.

Juliette made an amused face when her boyfriend opened the resealable little bag and sniffed at it before grabbing the sample with a pair of tweezers.

“I can put it under the microscope and stuff, but I know what we’ll find.”

“What is it?”

“Klaustreich.”

“You can know that just from smelling a few hairs?” Juliette sounded mixed between impressed, incredulous and maybe just a bit disgusted.

“One with such poor personal hygiene as this one? Yeah.”

“Ew!” she let out with a laugh.

Nick found himself smiling. Even if things were radically different from what he remembered, it was still very good to see Juliette so happy.

After a few minutes, they called him over and showed him something on the computer screen that honestly made no sense to him.

“What am I seeing here?”

“Well, this is definitely feline, but there’s…” Juliette started, but was interrupted by Nick’s phone.

“Sorry,” he apologized before he picked up the call. “Wu? What’s up? Got any new leads?”

There was silence for a moment, and both Juliette and Dan worried a bit when they saw the change in Nick’s facial expression.

“What? Where?” a short pause, then he continued. “I’m on my way.”

Nick stopped as he obviously listened to whatever Wu was saying over the phone.

“Doesn’t matter. I’m on my way. Yes, I will drive safely!” he almost shouted into the phone, obviously not in the mood of Wu’s strange brand of humor.

“Nick? What is it?” Juliette asked worriedly as soon as he hung up.

“There was a shooting at the City Hall. Sean’s hurt.”

“Oh, God, is he ok?”

“Wu said it was only a minor injury. But I need to get there.”

“Of course. Let us know how he is as soon as you find out, ok?” Juliette asked, giving his arm a supportive squeeze.

“Sure,” he said, and gave her a lopsided, unhappy smile.

“I’ll prepare a report about this thing. We might be lucky enough to isolate the human DNA and then maybe you can get a match more easily.”

“Thanks, Dan. I’ll call you later,” and with that, Nick turned around and hurried out not listening to Dan’s comments about CSI as he fought with himself not to run towards his car. He dialed Hank and got his voice mail. When he could finally reach him, he had already talked to Wu and was on his way to the hospital as well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how I said there was some angst coming?  
> Well... here you have some of it :D  
> Also, new arc starting for real. I really hope you all like what's coming and... well, the way this is coming, it looks like it'll become 25 chapters long or something like that.  
> Thank you so much for reading and sticking along for the ride!


	17. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16.**

 

“Are you fucking blind?!”

Nick managed to hit the brakes before he ran the guy over as he backed into the hospital’s parking space. The jokes about how bad his driving was had long since gotten old, but every now and then, like now that he felt the seatbelt digging into his sternum, he was ready to admit that he wasn’t the best driver ever. Right now, though, his mind was occupied by something a lot more important.

“You almost killed me, you moron!” he went on whining.

The guy had enough self-preservation instincts as to not get into Nick’s personal space, though, so he just flashed him his badge and said the words without even sparing him a look:

“Police. It’s an emergency,” and he just continued on his way, not minding the abuse of authority one second as his heart hammered against his ribs so hard that it was almost painful.

He had no idea how long it had taken him to get to the hospital, or whether he had ran a red light or had been speeding. He could think of one thing only, and that was Sean’s current state. Wu had told him the captain was fine and had just been grazed by a bullet, but he was way too familiar with how they handled information for the sergeant’s words to be comforting. He couldn’t stop thinking how it was standard procedure to call someone’s next of kin and tell them they were injured when they were actually dead, in order to reduce the shock a little bit.

Not having the patience to wait for the elevator, he ran up the stairs to the fourth floor, earning a couple of nurses’ dirty looks. He didn’t care.

Hank was already there, having been much closer to the hospital than him when he got the call. His partner seemed to read his mind.

“He’s fine Nick. Just a graze, but it bled a lot, so it worried the EMTs.”

The Grimm started looking around, trying to locate the captain in one of the nearby curtained-off sections.

“Weren’t you with Juliette? How did you get here so fast?” the older detective asked in a tone that made it clear that he already knew the answer and didn’t approve.

“I ran,” Nick said distractedly, having located Sean and already moving towards him.

“Everything’s back to normal, then,” Hank commented to himself and somehow managed not to roll his eyes.

Captain Renard was sitting on a hospital bed, which was looking smaller and sadder than usual in contrast with his powerful frame. He looked more annoyed than hurt, and the only evidence of injury on his shirtless body was the bandage around his upper left arm, with a tiny blood stain marring its otherwise perfect whiteness.

Nick didn’t exactly push the nurse out of his way to Sean’s side, but she still shot him an exasperated look and exited the small partition muttering something about how much she hated dealing with cops. The detective stopped just far enough that the distance was still appropriate, even though it danced on the limits of propriety.

“Hey,” he said, and was surprised at the obvious relief in his own voice.

“I didn’t expect you to get here so fast,” was Sean’s answer, and it was impossible to read the expression on his face.

Nick just gave him a half-shrug and a sardonic smile, his eyes roaming Sean’s torso in search for greater injury. Instead, he saw the scars of the previous gunshots. The ones that had almost… that had actually killed him once.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Sean said, making Nick snap back to reality, his right hand reaching towards him.

Nick grabbed his wrist, compromising like that as he stepped close enough to hug him, but refraining from doing so.

“You look ok. Mostly.”

“I am mostly ok,” and apparently he wasn’t as happy with the compromise as Nick would’ve thought before, because his fingers started stroking random patterns on Nick’s forearm under his sleeve. “There’s enough muscle tearing to make things a bit inconvenient, but nothing dangerous,” he paused, and when he continued, he did so in a lower voice. “Besides, I heal faster than kehrseite do.”

 “We can work with that. It’s just… you were shot… and the last time you were shot…”

Sean nodded, a shadow passing through his green eyes for a moment. It was only then that Nick realized that was a big part of what had been bothering him, even if only at a subconscious level. Before, he hadn’t known it was possible to bring someone back from death, but knowing it could be done only once and that that card had already been played with Sean somehow made it worse.

“Wu said something about an attempted hit on the Mayor?” Nick half-changed the subject before the silence could get too heavy to deal with in a public place.

“That’s going on the official records. The two men that shot at me were hundjager.”

“Verrat?”

“Yes. I checked before they forced me to come here.”

Nick processed that information for a moment.

“It wasn’t the Mayor they were after,” the Grimm said.

“Most likely it wasn’t. The timing is strange, though… unless something’s happened that we’re unaware of.”

Nick nodded, a frown appearing on his forehead as he thought that over. Things were complicated enough in their everyday lives to add even more unknown variables to them.

“Sounds like we have a bit of investigation ahead of us.”

“Yeah. But we can do that after you’ve recovered,” Nick warned. Apparently he didn’t do stern very well, because all that got him was a smile.

“It’s not bad enough to slow me down.”

“I heard something about lots of blood.”

“Enough to ruin my clothes even if they didn’t have a bullet hole in them, and to make the paramedics overreact.”

“Still, I’m glad they brought you here. Better to make sure you’re really ok.”

“Well, if it makes you feel better…” Sean started teasingly, just to be interrupted by the Grimm’s lips pressed gently against his. It was a soft and brief contact, but it meant a lot between them, especially given recent events.

“It does,”

“Now that your worries are put to rest, let’s see if the lady nurse will hurry up and release me,” letting go of Nick’s arm, he gestured at the nurse to call her over before turning towards his lover once more. “Please tell me you brought me a shirt or something.”

***

 

The fancy coat’s left sleeve had been cut open by the EMTs before Sean could assure them the wound wasn’t serious despite the copious amount of blood, but it would have been ruined anyway, with the way blood had soaked the expensive wool. Jacket, shirt, undershirt… even the tie had been ruined.

Sean hadn’t said anything about it, but his discomfort when he had to put the ruined clothes back on had been more than obvious.

“In my defense, nobody told me I needed to bring you a change of clothes” Nick said half-jokingly as he hurried to open the passenger’s door and grabbed the small bag with the meds and the bigger one containing the ruined coat and tie from the back seat.

Sean gave him a look that was surely meant to remind him that he was lightly injured, not an invalid, but the fondness in it took the edge off the silent complaint.

“Dry blood doesn’t exactly make for the most comfortable, but I’ll live. Besides, nobody’s recriminating you anything.”

“No. But I can’t imagine European princes are used to wearing ruined rags,” he grinned, and Sean returned the gesture with one of those subtle smiles where the amusement was most evident in his eyes.

“Do you know much about old world royalty?”

“I’m getting there,” he walked towards the house, and found that opening the door didn’t feel so unfamiliar anymore. “I’ve even been putting up with a sample specimen on a daily basis for research’s sake.”

“Sounds like quite a sacrifice you’re making.”

“That’s what we Grimms do. We go to great lengths in order to study and document.”

“And chop heads off.”

“That part is optional,” Nick scrunched his nose at the thought. He couldn’t exactly deny it, since he had decapitated his own share of creatures, but he wanted to believe he had never been unfair in doing so. Not like his ancestors had been.

He stepped aside to let Sean head directly to the bedroom upstairs, and then followed closely. If not for the reminder that someone had actively tried to assassinate him just a few hours before, Nick would have grinned at the way Sean took his clothes off, with obvious disgust, and then headed for the bathroom in all his naked glory, gorgeous tanned skin marred by a few scars here and there. There was a big one that ran down his left shoulder and off the shoulder blade, and Nick remembered Monroe mentioning something about a claw slash that Sean had taken for him. He would have to find the way to ask about it. Not a minute later, he heard the shower run.

Left alone in the room, Nick shrugged and collected the discarded clothes, stuffing the blood stained items in the same bag as the coat and tossing the rest where they belonged before wondering if Sean just leaving a mess of things was something he did every now and then, or if this was uncharacteristic. In the short time he was able to remember living with the man, Sean had always been perfectly neat, even if he had a cleaning lady and sent most of his clothes to dry-cleaning.

His mind was wandering to other things, avoiding any thoughts of assassination attempts, when Sean exited the shower, toweled dry and with only the slightly wet towel around his hips. Nick made a conscious effort to keep his jaw from going slack.

“You look better,” Nick commented, referring more to Sean’s mood than anything else.

“I feel better,” was the answer, and he sat on the edge of the bed with the obvious intention of letting Nick redress the stitched wound.

The Grimm grabbed the supplies and perched next to him.

“Not sure it was a great idea to shower so soon after getting stitches, though.”

“The meds are still taking their effect, it barely stung. Besides, I couldn’t stand the antiseptic smell for another minute,” Sean handed the detective a small bottle that contained a grayish purple paste.

“This,” said Nick, lifting the bottle to study it closer, “looks like something from Rosalee’s shop.”

“It is. It is also better than anything you can find at a kehrseite drug store.”

“Huh,” he uncapped the little bottle, nicely surprised when the thing smelled of sweet herbs and not like a latrine. “Do I just smear the thing over the wound?”

Sean gave him a strange look, which told him he had used the thing before.

“Yes,” the prince said, at last.

Nick proceeded to apply the mixture and bandage the wound, and after a few minutes, he was checking the bandage with a smug expression. The bandage looked pretty good, almost like a professional had dressed the wound, so he thought he deserved to feel proud of the end result.

“Thank you,” Sean said after Nick had finished putting things away.

“You don’t need to thank me for this.” The detective hesitated a moment, then his fingers brushed the faded scar on Sean’s shoulder blade. “This…”

“It’s old,” and he half-shrugged. The gesture only made Nick more decided to know more about it.

“How did that happen?”

This time, it was Sean who seemed to take his time to choose his words.

“We, you and me, were fighting a gang of yaguarete drug dealers.”

“Looks like we didn’t do that great,” Nick observed.

“It wasn’t one of our best moments, but we came up on top,” Sean’s arms found their way around Nick’s waist, pulling him closer. “And you’re alive after that, so I count it as a victory.”

“Was that my fault?”

“I’d gladly do it again,” Sean said, pressing a kiss to Nick’s clothed chest.

“It sounds like it should be me thanking you and not the other way around, then.”

“I wasn’t thanking you for picking me up from the hospital. Or for bandaging me up.”

“Then what for?”

“For being here, even if it means a few scars,” and he tightened his embrace just a little. “And for being yourself. Even if it means that the idea of spare clothes doesn’t cross your mind when you’re picking someone up at the hospital.”

They both chuckled, and Nick found himself leaning in closer, pressing up against Sean’s towel-clad body.

“I’m just happy you’re alright.”

“You do mean it,” Sean said, and he mentally kicked himself for sounding as pleasantly surprised as he felt.

Thankfully, Nick didn’t take it the wrong way.

“Of course I mean it,” the Grimm said with conviction, but no bite. He didn’t resist when Renard pulled him closer, straddling his lap where he sat on the bed. Their lips met in a slow kiss that soon became deeper, but not faster, and he found that he liked the sensation of burying his fingers in Sean’s wet, short, curly hair.

The injured arm went to wrap around Nick’s waist, and Sean somehow managed to work Nick’s shoes off without dislodging him from his lap. The first one was surprisingly easy; the second one took some awkward fumbling, but Sean refused to break the kiss or loosen up the arm he kept around the Grimm to make things easier, and Nick just grinned a bit into the kiss.

Nick’s sweater and undershirt were quickly discarded, and soon the bastard prince gave his lover a display of true skill as he unbuckled his belt in a pretty impressive single-handed maneuver. The landing on the soft, supple mattress was perhaps not the most graceful one in Sean’s life, but since they were both too busy devouring each other’s mouths, it didn’t matter.

With a little effort, they managed to rearrange their position on the huge bed and get rid of the rest of Nick’s clothes, kicking off underwear, pants –with the belt still threaded through the loops– and socks. Nick’s task was much easier, since he only had the soft towel to get rid of.

If the slow but decidedly hot kiss hadn’t had his blood boiling already, it would have reached scorching temperatures as he pressed the whole length of his naked body against Sean’s. He would, maybe, have felt a little self-conscious about his body… he thought he kept really fit, especially since he’d started his Grimm life, but next to Sean’s perfect physique, it was hard not to feel inadequate. Unless, of course, said man was letting his hands roam his body, from his shoulders to his hips, from his chest to… Nick broke the kiss, gasping for air as Sean’s fingers caught his manhood in a hard grip. He welcomed the touch, shamelessly grinding his hips against Sean’s hot body and somehow managing to remember to keep his weight on his hands on both sides of his lover’s body and not hurt his wounded shoulder.

“Is this… is this how we… what we usually did?” Nick got out between gulps for breath.

“Not exactly,” came Sean’s silky reply before he pulled the Grimm down for a deep kiss, securing his grip on his body and rolling them over in one single motion. “More like this.”

Nick found that caught between the mattress and his lover, with Sean’s superior weight making it harder to breathe, was not a bad place to be in, at all. The captain’s hands guided his thighs to wrap around his hips, and Nick felt his heart beat ever faster as he came to a definite decision.

“Do we have lube?” he asked, because that was easier to voice.

Sean froze, for just a fraction of a second, but enough for Nick to know he hadn’t expected that.

“Yes,” his voice was low and husky, almost a growl. He pressed a kiss to Nick’s reddened lips, and then he forced himself to disentangle himself from his body and roll over to his side of the bed to reach for the small bottle of lube.

Nick didn’t bother to ask if Sean would top. He just followed his lover’s body language and moved to let him settle between his legs, adjusting his position to allow his lube-coated fingers to reach between his thighs. He tensed a bit when Sean touched him, but he soon relaxed. The invasion in his body felt different from what he remembered from his early adulthood, the lube wasn’t a gross cold gel, but a warm and silky substance; Sean’s fingers were obviously experienced and gentle, completely unlike the awkward handling of his old roommate. Sean’s hand moved in a subtle way that suddenly made his nerves sing with a wave of unexpected pleasure, and from that moment, he didn’t have any difficulties relaxing anymore.

“Are you ok?”

“Very much so,” and he didn’t care if his voice was more moan than anything else when Sean removed his fingers. He arched his back, following Sean’s grip on his hips, and welcomed his closeness, the way he moved to bring their bodies together in a single motion, strong but gentle. “Oh, god,” he let out in a broken voice, relishing the sensation of their bodies melted into one.

Nick would have thought that someone like Sean would invariably be rough in bed, perhaps a little emotionally distant despite the physical closeness. Now, as he found himself easily falling into Sean’s rhythm with an odd sense of familiarity, he had to wonder how he could have ever thought that. Sean’s body was strong and hard, setting a firm pace for both of them; his kisses were deep and demanding, making him feel lightheaded and definitely sure that breathing was not a priority; but his caresses were gentle, his hands loving as they roamed his body; his love-making was the perfect balance between hard and sweet, and Nick was sure he could get used to it, but it would never get old.

He wrapped his legs around Sean’s body as they moved together, his hands clawing at his lover’s broad back as if he was trying to melt him into his own skin.

“I love you, Nick. So much,” and his kisses descended, hot as a branding iron, down his jaw and his neck, to degenerate in desperate bites at his collarbone.

“Sean… Sean…” he moaned, and just barely refrained from returning the words. He could let the words out, but he wanted them to be undoubtedly true when he said them, unmistaken for passionate lies fruit of pure heat.

The prince arched his back, changing the angle they both moved in, and Nick felt his hips lift off the mattress. In a corner of his mind, he knew that if this had happened before his Grimm abilities had awoken, he couldn’t have possibly managed the acrobatics. Not without injuring himself, at least.

Feeling the pressure pool in his lower belly and his nerves tighten up, he opened his eyes to beg Sean to slow down if he didn’t want to finish right then, but he hadn’t expected to meet his lover’s eyes, fixed on his face with such intensity that it took his words away.

“Sean,” he choked out, and he saw in the prince’s eyes that he understood, that he was right there with him, and he let go, allowing the sensations to overwhelm him, to blind him in the hot white sensation of orgasm as he felt Sean finish with him, his movements stilled for an instant before his powerful body broke in uncontrolled shudders.

The accumulated tension seemed to leave both their bodies at the same time, and they crumbled together onto the mattress beneath them. Nick hid his face against Sean’s shoulder, relishing the sensation of his hot and damp skin against his own, of his ragged breath against his ear…

After what felt like forever, Sean moved, pulling out of Nick’s body and readjusting his position so he wasn’t crushing the Grimm beneath him and they were lying mostly side by side. The detective grunted, but moved to accommodate his lover, giving him a long sideways look that had no little part of smugness in it.

Sean was studying him closely, as if he was trying to unveil an ancient mystery that he’d thought he had long ago figured out, just to find out he knew nothing at all.

“What is it?” he asked, at last.

The prince smiled.

“I’ve missed this.”

“Oh, thank you,” Nick said in mocking offense.

“Of course I’ve missed making love to you; you’re _very_ good in bed,” the captain explained lightheartedly. “Good enough to make up for your terrible driving skills.”

“I’m going to punch you,” Nick threatened, fighting back a laugh.

Sean had no such qualms, laughing openly at his own joke. It was a rare and beautiful sound, and the Grimm found himself smiling with the knowledge that he was one of the few people in the world who had the privilege of having Sean share it with them.

“Making love with you is something I’ve sorely missed,” Sean said, “but I missed more the simple fact of having you here, like this, willing to be this close.”

“I’ve missed feeling like this. Things haven’t been easy for a long time,” he could see how Sean debated with himself, and then decided not to ask if the life he used to have with Juliette in that other version of the world hadn’t been all sweet honey after all. Something unreadable passed through his green eyes like a shadow, and was gone the next instant. When his hand went up to caress his jaw, Nick leaned into the contact.

“I love you,” Sean stated.

Nick knew he was saying it like that because he wanted it to be clear that he meant it, that those weren’t words he spoke carelessly in the throes of passion. His lips half parted to try to explain why he hadn’t returned them, but he was silenced by a short, soft kiss.

“There haven’t been many people in my life to whom I’ve told that.”

The detective nodded, acknowledging that as the simple fact it was. Something told him those people could be counted on the fingers of one hand, with fingers to spare. That convinced him that his next words would not only be understood, but appreciated.

“I like you a lot, Sean… but it still feels like too soon,” he paused, for a moment just feeling the soft caress of Sean’s fingers against his cheek and looking into gorgeous gold-green eyes. “I think I’m getting there, but…”

“We agreed to take things slowly.”

“I’m sorry, I…”

“No. There’s nothing to feel sorry about. I trust what we had, and I know we can have that again and then more… especially if you keep being honest like this.”

“Can I have the same from you?”

“Always, Nick. I once told you that, together, we would make history.”

“That I remember,” the Grimm smiled at the memory.

“And I know we will forge the future. In more ways than one.”

The next kiss was slow, and softer, but no less intense than the previous ones, although in a different way.

At some point, Sean cleaned them up a little with one discarded item of clothing or another, and then returned to tangle his gorgeously sculpted limbs with his. Nick couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so at peace in his life, and that was not even taking into account that it was a Monday, with a gruesome open case, the Verrat trying to assassinate Sean, and some unknown event in the obscure world of wesen politics.

Cuddled close to one of the most dangerous creatures in the world, Nick closed his eyes and slept peacefully through the night.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is, I think, a turning point in this story.  
> I really liked how it turned out, so I hope you enjoy it! :D


	18. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17.**

 

 

The alarm rang out and woke Nick from a deep and comfortable sleep. It didn’t jolt him awake, but he still wished he could just ignore it, snuggle closer to Sean, and go back to sleep.

Except for Sunday morning, he hadn’t woken up with Sean still asleep by his side, and that fact made him frown for a moment as he remembered the reason Sean wasn’t up and moving already. Of course, with the alarm still going, Sean didn’t stay asleep much longer, and soon he was stretching, disentangling from Nick’s arms with the grace of a huge, wild feline.

“Good morning,” Sean said, wincing just a little as he stretched and was reminded of his injured arm.

“Good morning,” Nick answered automatically, letting out a grunt as he forced himself to get up and search for his cell phone, which was still in the pocket of his discarded pants… somewhere around the bed. He fished it out, stopped the alarm, and let himself fall back in bed, unwilling to start his day.

Sean lazily reached out and rested a hand on Nick’s side, not moving to hug him or caress him.

“I think I will skip going to the precinct today.”

Nick shot him a worried look.

“Are you feeling alright?”

“It stings a little, if you’re referring to the wound; but I’m ok,” Sean said.

“Oh. That’s good,” the detective hesitated a moment. “It’s just… it’s weird that you’re taking a day off.”

“I’ll have to make a few calls to explain what happened yesterday. But everyone will expect this wound to take longer to heal than it actually will, so I’ll take advantage of that and use the time to find out what’s going on, either in Europe or here. The Verrat doesn’t make random moves, and something has to have changed for the royal families to order a direct hit like that. We need to know what that is.”

“We should be ready for them to try again.”

“I don’t think they will. Not so soon after failing like that. They know we’ll be on our guard, so their chances at killing me with any measure of discretion are infinitesimal. Getting any bolder might mean an all-out war. I doubt they’ll risk it at this time.”

Nick didn’t know he was frowning until Sean’s hand moved to caress his forehead, making him smoothen his expression.

“Do you need me to…?”

“I’d like to have you around for more than one reason… but I think you do have work to do.”

“We do have an open case. One that apparently involves a klaustreich.”

“That’s not surprising. Stereotypes don’t do anyone any favors, but klaustreich are often involved in trouble.”

Nick nodded.

“I should get moving…”

“Probably,” Sean agreed, in a tone that left the Grimm wondering if he meant to sound playful or not.

The detective sighed deeply and forced himself to get up and go take a shower.

Sean lied in bed, staring at the high ceiling and ignoring the sting from his stitched arm while he heard the water run in the bathroom.

Their normal lives weren’t exactly the most normal, calm or safe ever; but he was used to playing this real-life chess game, he’d been doing it for so long that it had become second nature to him. He was used to speculation, to watch over his shoulder and keep an eye on shadows, to gamble with his life and the fate of the world… and it had been way too long since the last time he’d had no solid grounds to start guessing the motives behind a move from his enemies.

“Don’t hurt yourself,” said Nick’s playful voice as he exited the shower, and Sean couldn’t help the way the corner of his lips curled in a smile at the ongoing game between the two of them.

“It won’t make the arm wound any worse.”

Nick looked at the mentioned injury and frowned at the sight of the bandage, stained with dried blood.

“I thought it was better.”

Sean looked at his arm almost lazily, ignoring the sting so Nick wouldn’t worry more than he should.

“It must have bled a little last night,” Sean commented, and then hurried to add something as he saw Nick’s mouth open to say something else, most likely an objection. “What about you? How do you feel today?”

“I didn’t get shot at yesterday.”

“I wasn’t referring to that.”

“Oh,” the Grimm didn’t blush, but he hesitated for a moment. “I… thought I’d feel more… you know, sore. It’s been a long time, and all that.”

Sean grinned, and Nick enjoyed seeing the gesture on his face, even if it came at his own expense.

“You don’t remember it, but it hasn’t been that long.”

This time, Nick did feel his face get a bit warm, so he turned around to get his clothes and get ready for work.

“Are you staying in bed until late?”

“Not really. I do have to make a few calls. Some to the Mayor and other authorities, others more important and less official.”

“You should stay in bed until late,” Nick said, threading his belt through the loops in his pants.

“I might. I do need this to heal faster… I could certainly do without its inconvenience.”

The detective stood there, next to the bed, all dressed and ready, for a moment obviously not knowing exactly what to do. Then he seemed to make a decision and walked around the bed, leaning down over Sean to kiss his lips.

“Take care. I mean it. If there is anything strange going on, you call me immediately. Even if you don’t have confirmation of anything.”

Sean nodded, a hand cupping Nick’s jaw in a subtle caress.

“I will,” the prince promised, and then just waited until Nick had left the house before getting out of bed. With a grunt, he remembered he had left his car at the city hall, and with the way things had gone with Nick, he hadn’t bothered to ask if someone had taken his car back to the precinct or something.

The stitched arm looked surprisingly good, and Sean made a mental note to thank Rosalee for the salve the next time he saw her. He was damn strong, and his zauberbiest part didn’t hurt that, either… but the way he’d lived his whole life had made him eager to be always ready and at the top of his game, and even a minor injury like this usually made him hyper alert. There was no way he’d just lie down and see the time pass, even for an extra hour.

The kehrseite would expect him to be slow, high on meds and late to wake up, so when he finished his shower and got dressed, he didn’t reach for his work phone, but for the one he used for his more personal calls.

He dialed the number from his memory, wondering if the number would still be active or if it would’ve already been changed. He heard the call be picked up, but no one answered. It was exactly what he was expecting.

“C’est moi,” he said.

“Good to hear you survived. We need your assistance,” Tavitian said, skipping all the niceties and going straight to the point. It was a quality that allowed him to be a good leader for the resistance, and one Sean appreciated in the man. “Steiner was killed…”

“Yes. I’m up to speed on that.”

“Not so much. We have to move fast…”

***

Nick arrived to the precinct to find Hank and Wu already going over a few new pieces of information at Hank’s desk.

“Do we have good news? You look like we have good news,” he said as a greeting of sorts.

Hank studied him for a moment.

“You look like you’re in a good mood, despite what happened. The Captain is ok, then, right?”

“Yeah, the wound bled a lot, but it wasn’t too deep. He’ll be fine in no time.”

“Of course he’s in a good mood,” Wu said, “this is a relationship that progresses only when there’s blood involved. I’d bet some of the best stepping stones have involved guts, too.”

“What?” Nick demanded, because, seriously, it was way too early for that kind of thing.

“I’m just saying that normal people send each other flowers and that kind of stuff; but you and you-know-who, and I don’t mean Voldemort, make progress in that weird thing that passes for a relationship while bathed in blood. That might be the secret for a healthy relationship that doesn’t end in a messy divorce, though.”

Both detectives shot him equally dark looks, and Wu just smiled, but he had the decency to go back to work.

“Anyway, we have here something that might brighten your bloody honeymoon: we were right. Cause of death was confirmed to be overdose,” he said as he passed Nick the forensics report. “And everything seems to indicate she was indeed forced to inhale the drugs. Toxicology report shows that she had quite a pharmacy inside of her, some were obvious residues from earlier uses, but others were a lot more recent.”

Nick frowned. He felt sorry for the girl, and this was the kind of case that made him remember why he had become a cop in the first place, trying to help people and prevent others from suffering at the hands of criminals.

“Also, we found fingerprints that don’t belong to the victim, and it looks like we hit the jackpot because we have matches already,” he announced proudly as he pulled out the files of the suspects. “One is law-abiding citizen Chase Miller, thirty two, originally from Westbrook, Maine, with an awesome record that includes but is not limited to assault, robbery, B&E, driving under the influence, possession of illegal substances and so on, in all of eleven different states. Looks like he moved to Portland recently, because he doesn’t have even a speeding ticket yet.”

“His fingerprints match the ones on the victim,” Hank chipped in.

“Sounds like our guy, then. What about the others?”

“Their fingerprints are on the scene, but not on the victim. One is Paul Turner, a twenty year old local junkie. The other is Samuel Brown, recently out after serving two years for assaulting and attempting to rape a high school girl.”

“Do we have a last known?”

“Not unless you count streets of Portland as an address, but I’d say we have enough to go on, right?”

“Indeed,” Hank said, already up and shrugging on his coat.

***

Despite being busy searching for their suspect, Nick had considered whether he should call Sean or not at least five times during the day. At the end, he managed to convince himself that he shouldn’t call him, in case the captain had decided to actually rest to help his recovery.

A long day and two arrests later, Hank agreed with him that they would do better waiting until next day, since both guys, a klaustreich and a skalengeck, were too stoned to be properly interrogated. Besides, any confession they could get out of them while so heavily under the influence of narcotics could be considered invalid, anyway.

The sun was going down when he got into his car and pulled out his phone, speed dialing Sean.

“Nick,” was Sean’s greeting.

“Hey. We’ve made great progress on the case,” he said, and he knew he sounded proud and cheerful, because he would never be a poker player like Sean was. “We have to wait until tomorrow to try to get a valid confession, though. How was your day?”

“Eventful.”

“Huh,” was all he could manage.

“Could you get us dinner, Nick?”

“Sure, I was about to go home,” and he was surprised at how easy it was to refer to the fancy house as home after just a few days. “Had anything in mind?”

“Actually, yes. Maybe you could stop by Red Robin for bacon burgers?”

“Sounds good,” Nick said, because it did, even if he was a bit surprised by Sean’s choice.

“Four of them, big fries. And a case of Dr. Pepper, if you can stop by the grocery store.”

“Yeah, I can manage that.”

“Good. I’ll see you soon, then.”

And just like that, the call was over. Nick stared at his phone for a few seconds, with a fast food order and a lot of questions in his head. If the thought wasn’t so disturbing, he would have joked to himself that Sean might be pregnant and not injured… but since the wesen world and hexenbiester in particular had so many peculiarities he still didn’t understand and… A shudder crawled down his back and he shook his head, firmly deciding that he didn’t even want such horrifying things in his mind. Instead, he chose to go over the case’s details again as he put the car in drive and made his way to the burger restaurant.

Sooner than he’d expected at that hour of the day because of the traffic, he was finally at home, balancing the six pack of Dr. Pepper and the paper bag from RR as he fumbled with the house keys. He thanked whatever deity for electronic car locks, because otherwise, he didn’t think he could have managed it.

The door was an easier task, since he could cheat and use the wall to hold the things he was carrying as he unlocked it.

“Sean!” he started to call, and immediately lowered his voice as he entered the house to find his lover sitting in the living room. And not alone. “Oh. I… didn’t know we had visitors.”

Sean stood up and went to help, taking the soda case from him. The detective in Nick noticed how Sean favored his left arm, even though he was trying to hide it with an admirable amount of success.

“Nick, this is Andreas Steiner,” Sean introduced, gesturing towards the… boy. Because there was no better way to describe their visitor, even if at first glance Nick had thought he was much older. The first impression was mostly due to the boy’s height, which made him taller than Nick, though not as tall as Sean. At a second glance, though, his face and the proportions of his body were still those of a boy in his mid-teens. “Andreas, this is detective Nicholas Burkhardt.”

The boy approached and shook the hand Nick offered him.

“It is a pleasure,” the boy said in a heavily accented English.

“Likewise,” Nick answered, and just smiled when Sean’s look told him he’d explain things later. “Let’s have dinner, then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaand, new arc starts officially!  
> There's quite a few new things coming with this little change. That might not be so little for our guys :3  
> Hope you enjoy!


	19. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18.**

 

“You need to be more careful,” Sean said calmly into the phone, even if he wanted to yell at Tavitian that it was not a little inconvenience if he’d come close to being assassinated by the Verrat.

“The operation is still safe.”

“How can you guarantee that if the Verrat moved so fast after your meeting was over?”

“We caught the traitor. And he didn’t know what we really intended to do. All he knew was that we’d send the Steiner boy to you by the first days of March, and that the American authorities would put him under your protection under the guise of being a political refugee.”

“That’s less than two weeks from now.”

“It is,” Tavitian paused. “Which is why they moved so fast to try to take you out and stop our plans. But we knew we had a mole, and we anticipated that move.”

Sean didn’t say anything about their failure to warn him, and was glad when Tavitian continued.

“I apologize, personally, for not being able to contact you sooner. They moved faster than we thought, and our priority was getting Steiner safely out of Austria.”

“You managed to do that, I assume?” because he would be royally pissed if the Laufer had failed there, too.

“We did. Most of our contacts think he will arrive to America ten days from now. Only a select few know he’s in America already… and even fewer know he’s in Portland already. It makes five of us, with you.”

“When did you get here?”

“Not twenty minutes ago. I suggest we move fast.”

“Agreed,” Sean said, and then proceeded to make a quick plan to meet with the Laufer leader, including two back up plans in case things didn’t go their way.

As it happened, the fact that his SUV was still at the city hall played to his advantage, and he had a good excuse to swallow his meds, call a cab and pretend he was in no hurry to go anywhere once he’d finished his phone call with the mayor. The fact that the whole thing was being treated as an attempt on the mayor’s life had the advantage of explaining it a lot more easily than a random shooting or, even worse, an attempt on Sean’s life; on top of making him look like a hero, which on one hand brought some unwanted attention his way but at the same time gave him more influence he could possibly use later.

The meeting with Tavitian was lightning fast, just barely enough to let him know that the boy hadn’t slept in over two days, hand him a tote bag and make it clear that the next step would be decided over the course of the next few days. It felt like he hadn’t been there for even two minutes when he was on his way again, with the stunned boy occupying the passenger’s seat staring at him whenever he thought he wouldn’t notice.

“I’m sorry for the lack of a proper introduction, but the faster we’re out of sight, the better,” he said in German. “I am Sean Renard.”

The boy seemed to snap back into life, and he actually blinked a few times, obviously trying to clear his head a bit.

“I’m Andreas Steiner. Emil Steiner’s son… but I think you knew that already. And I know who you are. I mean, we have never met before, but I’ve heard a lot about you,” he answered in the same language. “All of it’s been good.”

Sean smiled, in that subtle gesture that barely touched the corner of his mouth, his eyes scanning the mirrors in search for any possible tails.

“Then you’ve either heard some lies, or haven’t heard enough.”

The boy tensed, his hands gripping the seatbelt that crossed over his torso.

“Don’t worry. You can trust me. And if you feel like you don’t want to trust me, you can at least trust that I will keep you alive and safe.”

“Where are we going?”

“My house.”

“Your house…” Andreas said, with a slight quiver in his voice.

“It should be safe enough.”

“You’re Prince Sean Renard. I doubt there’s any place safer in America than your house.” This time, Sean could tell the thing in Andreas’ voice was admiration, and he allowed himself a more real smile, wondering what exactly Tavitian had told the boy. Maybe he’d been fed a lot of sweet lies in order to get him to agree to be shipped out of Austria and away from all familiarity. Whatever it had been, it looked like the boy was barely starting to relax, and Sean decided he preferred him to be as calm as possible, given the circumstances.

“I wouldn’t go as far as saying that. But I think it’s good enough.”

Andreas nodded, and Sean again noticed how the teenager kept staring at him.

“I take it this is your first time in America?” the captain asked.

“Yes. I always wanted to come… but I never imagined it being like this.”

“Are you disappointed by what you’ve seen so far?”

“No! No, no, not at all,” and there was perhaps too much enthusiasm on his words. “I like what I’ve seen so far, even if it’s not much. I always figured I’d come on vacations, though. Not… you know, running for my life. Fleeing from my own family…”

Sean’s eyebrow arched slightly. He was starting to see why the Laufer had decided to leave the boy in his hands, instead of keeping him hidden in a less active location or leaving him with someone who wasn’t in the spotlight so much as he was.

“That is something I’m familiar with,” Sean said.

“So I’ve heard,” he turned to look out the window, fidgeting with the seatbelt as the silence went on for long minutes. “Does it ever get better?” he asked at last.

“It does,” Sean said after a pause. “Either the other lose interest, or you get stronger, smarter, wiser… and generally better at dealing with things.”

Andreas nodded.

“I’m guessing it was the latter for you, wasn’t it?”

“It was. It has been,” he corrected himself. “Not that I regret it, even if it hasn’t been easy. All the things I’ve learned while trying to stay one step ahead of them have saved my life in many other unrelated occasions.”

The boy looked at him, and there was the unmasked admiration again. This time, however, he didn’t say anything.

Sean pulled into the driveway and stopped the car.

“This is where you live?” the boy asked as he got out of the car, eyebrows raised as he studied the house.

“It is,” he didn’t offer to help with the small bag Andreas carried, and instead walked to the door with sure steps, discretely scanning the surroundings once more before gesturing the boy inside. Cautiousness could be mistaken for paranoia some times, and paranoia wasn’t exactly reassuring for a sheltered young man on the run for his life, so he minded his body language even more than usual.

“Thank you,” he murmured as he stepped into the house. Sean thought it was strange that he was looking around like that, all wide-eyed and surprised, like he was in a museum or a palace. Surely a young man like him was used to seeing grander, much more luxurious and extravagant places than his house which, while still nice and comfortable, was no huge manor.

“We have a guest room you can use,” and he stopped his next words as he saw the un-voiced question in the teenager’s face. “Nick Burkhardt lives with me. He’s out at work right now, but he’ll be back later.”

“Oh,” a small pause as he evidently thought on something. “The Grimm.”

“So you’ve heard about him,” Sean said, the smile on his lips genuine as pride swelled inside him. He was well aware of Nick’s abilities, and although it would be to their advantage if their enemies underestimated him, he couldn’t help but to feel proud that his lover was acknowledged as the powerful and dangerous Grimm that he was.

“Of course,” he said, as if it was obvious.

“Well, you’ll get to meet him later. Are you hungry?”

The boy shook his head.

“In that case, it might be better for you to get some rest, for now. Tavitian said you haven’t slept in two days.”

“I think it was more,” he shrugged. “It does feel like it’s been longer.”

“As if jet-lag wasn’t bad enough on its own,” Sean commented lightheartedly, as if the whole thing was a pleasure trip instead of a deadly political conspiracy. “Come on, let me show you your room.”

Andreas nodded tiredly and followed him upstairs. The captain showed him into the room, silently thanking his very efficient cleaning lady for making the room look as pristine as ever after Nick had returned to the master bedroom. He also appreciated the discretion, since there had been no comment at all on what must have looked like a bad couple fight.

“Make yourself comfortable. That,” he pointed towards the door off to the side of the room, “is the bathroom. It’s usually well stocked with all the basics, but if there’s anything else you need, just let me know. I’ll either be downstairs or in my room, if you need me.”

Andreas nodded again, looking suddenly exhausted. Most likely, all the excitement and lack of sleep was finally catching up with him. Sean felt sympathy for him, remembering being in almost the exact same situation what felt like a hundred years ago. He rested a hand on the young man’s shoulder, feeling him jump and then relax under the contact.

“You’re safe now. And I’ll make sure you stay that way. So you can now relax and get some rest.”

The boy grabbed his hand where it rested on his left shoulder, gripping it as if it was a lifeline.

“Prince Sean…”

“Just Sean is fine.”

“Thank you,” he said without acknowledging the correction.

Sean gave him a small smile and squeezed his shoulder before letting go of it.

“Get some rest. I’ll see you later.”

“Uh huh. Yes,” he added hurriedly, as if he’d forgotten for a moment that he was trying to be more or less formal.

Sean left him, meaning to make a few phone calls to see what was becoming of the case that the two Verrat vermin had started the day before by trying to kill him, and to think of a way to explain to Nick why they’d be hosting a refugee in their house.

Andreas stared at the closed door for what felt like forever, feeling relieved and sad at the same time that the Prince had left him alone for a while. With a sigh, he kicked off his shoes and sat on the edge of the bed. He planned to take a shower and then sleep for a couple of hours… or a couple of days, if that’s what his body demanded.

He didn’t notice when his body just fell backwards onto the bed, or when his brain just decided he needed to sleep more than he needed to shower, or to think of all the implication of being in Prince Sean’s house.

Hours later, Sean received a call from Nick, and he asked his lover to bring back the most informal dinner he could think of without telling him the reason. Every now and then, he genuinely enjoyed the simple pleasure of junk food, but right now he doubted a formal thing would be the best thing for the young Steiner. He refrained from telling Nick anything about the boy over the phone.

Once he’d hung up, he went upstairs to check on Andreas, and found him deeply asleep, with his legs hanging off the bed as if he’d just sat on the edge of the mattress and then simply collapsed. For what he knew, that was most likely what had happened. He leaned forward and gently shook his arm to wake him.

The boy gasped as he jolted awake, scrambling to get up in such a violent way that Sean barely got out of the way in time to avoid getting hit by flailing limbs.

“Hey,” Sean said in a calming voice, and all of a sudden he’d somehow acquired an armful of tall, shaking, disoriented and terrified teenager. He finished wrapping his arms around the young man. “Hey, it’s alright. You’re in Portland, in America. You’re safe.”

Andreas melted against him, burying his face against his collarbone, his heart beating so fast that Sean could feel it hammering against his own chest. It took a long time before he stopped shaking, and even longer before he let go of him. Sean pretended not to notice when he tried to be discrete about wiping the tears off his cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” the boy said, avoiding his eyes.

“It’s alright. You don’t have anything to be sorry about.”

“I know I’m supposed to be strong.”

“I’ve known strong, experienced men to crumble down under less pressure than you have on you right now.”

This time, he didn’t bother to try to hide the fact that he was wiping tears off his face, even if he looked angry about it.

“Why don’t you take a shower? It might make you feel better.”

“How long did I sleep?”

“A few hours,” Sean said dismissively, knowing that even the smallest things could easily upset him. “I talked to Nick. He’s coming home soon, and he’ll bring dinner for all of us.”

“Ok,” he nodded, taking a moment or two to put himself together before entering the bathroom, still feeling like he wasn’t really awake, and not just because of the tiredness behind his eyes.

Sean made his way downstairs, wondering if Nick would get home quickly enough to let him have a word with him before their guest joined them. Normally, he knew Nick would have just rolled with him until they could talk; but given recent events, he wasn’t sure things would work as smoothly.

As luck would have it, Andreas joined him at the living room first, wearing different clothes and with his hair still wet from the shower. He had barely taken a seat and Sean was just about to try to start a conversation when the door opened.

“Sean!” and the prince felt at one time happy to hear the familiar voice and slightly tense with the situation. The Grimm stopped just a few steps inside, both hands full with the food and drinks. “Oh, I… didn’t know we had visitors.”

Before anything else could happen, Sean hurried to offer his help, taking the case of soda cans from his hands before turning towards the young man.

“Nick, this is Andreas Steiner,” Sean introduced, noticing how the teenager eyed the detective wearily, as if he was half expecting him to attack him even as he forced himself to approach the Grimm. “Andreas, this is detective Nicholas Burkhardt.”

Andreas walked up to them, trying and failing to make his steps look steady.

“It is a pleasure,” he said in a heavily accented English and extended his hand towards the American, as if he was trying to show Sean that he wasn’t about to cower away from the Grimm.

Sean prayed silently that Nick would just play along, and was quickly put at ease when the detective gave the young Austrian his disarming, boyish smile and shook the hand he was offered.

“Likewise,” were the words out of his mouth, and he exchanged a quick look with Sean. “Let’s have dinner, then.”

The prince smiled at his lover, feeling that strange security he felt when he knew he had Nick’s support on something, when he knew that the Grimm trusted him blindly. It was something he had sorely missed ever since Nick had woken up with his memories all gone, and the relief was almost enough to make him laugh aloud. Or cry. Whichever, because he hadn’t wanted to even admit it to himself; but he’d been afraid that some of the little things that had made their relationship so solid and strong were gone forever.

“Let’s have dinner,” he agreed, and gestured their visitor towards the dining area.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's this day of the week again! Yaaay!  
> I hope you all like what's happening now in the story... and I wonder if any of you suspect where this is going. I'd love to hear if you have any hypothesis :D  
> Updated the rate to Explicit because someone was kind enough to let me know some scenes might be toeing the line between that and Mature, so... better to be safe, I think.  
> Also, I'm sure I'm not the only one nervous and excited about the season finale tomorrow, right?  
> Thanks for reading so far!


	20. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19.**

They left the food and the cans of soda on the table, made Andreas take a seat, and then Nick and Sean retreated into the kitchen, using the obvious excuse of bringing glasses to steal a few instants alone.

The question wasn’t voiced, but Sean read it clearly in his lover’s eyes.

“It’s alright. Or I hope it will be.”

“Laufer?” Nick asked in a low voice.

“Yes. He’s…”

“Steiner… isn’t he the son of the guy that was killed a few days ago?”

“He is.”

Nick’s brow furrowed.

“Is he the reason they tried to kill you?”

“That seems to be the case. But it’s not his fault.”

Nick turned towards the general direction of the dining room, arms crossing over his chest like they did every time the detective was thinking hard about a serious problem. Sean knew those situations often turned out fine, though most of the time they involved blood. The prince took a deep breath.

“We need to keep him safe.”

Nick didn’t look too convinced, but he nodded and grabbed a couple of glasses, a look shot Sean’s way saying clearly that they needed to talk about that afterwards.

Back in the kitchen, Nick handed the boy a glass with a couple of ice cubes in it, and then a can of soda.

“They had some kind of problem at the store, so there were no cold drinks,” he explained with a subtle smile. Sean knew the gesture was more to reassure himself than anything else.

“It’s alright,” the Austrian said, his eyes stealing quick glances at Sean as if he was just looking for his approval.

The Grimm then handed out the burgers and fries, unceremoniously unwrapping his and taking a bite off it. His stomach immediately reminded him that lunch had been early and the day had been a busy one.

“Is this your first time in America?” he asked conversationally.

The boy didn’t answer until he was done with the mouthful he was chewing, and Nick couldn’t help noticing that something in the way he moved reminded him of Sean. Was it the simple fact that they were both European? Was Andreas related to royalty, as well? Or was it all the natural result of a fancy upbringing?

“It is,” Andreas said, his English holding just the slightest hesitance, as if he had to translate each phrase in his head before he spoke it. “I arrived here today. Around noon, I think.”

“Well, I hope you like it. I mean, despite the circumstances.”

“Thank you,” he said in a way that made it obvious the answer was almost a reflex.

“Do you know how long you are supposed to stay?” Sean asked calmly, and the boy’s eyes shot towards him, full of conflicting emotions as the question obviously brought back things that he’d been trying not to think about for too long.

“I…” Andreas started, then had to pause to swallow. “I’m not sure exactly, Your Highness. But I think it will be… at least five years,” he dropped his eyes, suddenly finding his burger very interesting.

Nick gave Sean a worried look.

“Just Sean, please,” the captain said.

The boy looked at the prince again, and for a few moments he strained to make a decision. When he looked away, he continued.

“Almost nobody knows what the plan really is. Just the leaders,” he paused. “But I think you should know… the people that… that killed my father… they did not expect the testament to give me control. Big changes cannot be made without me, or before I am twenty one years old. My sister is protected… but they all said that Austria was not safe for me. Not even Europe. So they wanted me to come here and stay for some time. Officially, I am here for… school. They said… that it will also give me time to think. And decide.”

“Decide what?” Nick asked, trying not to sound too much like he did when he was conducting an official interrogation.

“What to do. About…” he lowered his voice. “About the Laufer,” he raised his eyes again, and both cops knew that the boy wasn’t supposed to share that piece of information with anyone.

Nick didn’t know what to say. Political intrigues weren’t exactly his arena. Fortunately, Sean knew exactly how to approach such situations.

“Well, as long as you are with us, we will make sure you’re safe. From everyone.”

“Thank you, Your Highness,” he said with obvious relief.

“Sean,” he corrected gently, giving the boy a barely-there smile.

“Sean,” Andreas echoed, in a tone that made Nick blink a couple of times and then look between Sean and the teenager.

Afterwards, they returned to their meal, with Sean masterfully leading the conversation away from deadly serious matters without seeming to obviously avoid the matter of Andreas’ precarious situation.

Apparently the teenager had also calmed down enough to realize he was hungry, because he proceeded to inhale his burger, then the fries, and then he happily accepted and wolfed down the other burger when Sean gave it to him.

Not long after, he eagerly took the suggestion that he should go to bed to try and recover from the days he’d spent running for his life.

“He’s staying in the guest room,” Sean told Nick as soon as Andreas was upstairs and out of earshot. “I hope you don’t mind.”

“No,” he paused. “Unless you plan to make me sleep on the couch,” he finished with an amused glint in his eyes.

“Then you shouldn’t worry.”

“Good. I can’t stop thinking, though… weren’t you supposed to rest today?”

“I did get some rest,” Sean said, a normally buried part of himself happy that Nick showed concern for him. “I only made a few calls, and went to pick him up. Then we returned here, and he was asleep most of the time.”

Nick nodded, but still didn’t look too happy about it.

“Has your arm given you any trouble?”

“Not really. I’ve had much worse.” He saw Nick start to frown, so he hurried to press a quick kiss to his face. His lips stretched in a smile when Nick returned it, pressing his lips to the corner of his mouth.

“You did say your day had been eventful. I wasn’t really expecting international conspiracies to be included in such events.”

“They become a common thing in our lives every now and then,” he distractedly caressed Nick’s jaw.

“Sounds like you have a lot to tell me about what brought… Andreas, to stay with us.”

“Less than you would think. Tavitian and I barely exchanged a few words,” he started upstairs, and Nick followed him. “But between what we heard from Andreas and what Tavitian didn’t say, we can gather a lot.”

The detective made an assenting sound, and Sean continued as they went into the master bedroom.

“The Laufer decided to get the boy out of Europe before someone else could get their hands on him. They also decided to leave him under my protection for a while…”

“Which explains the hit on you.”

“Exactly. If they’d managed to take me out before they got the boy here, it’d throw the Laufer out of balance and give the royals a good chance to come up on top.”

The Grimm’s jaw tightened as he heard Sean casually refer to his attempted assassination, and he had to remind himself that having people after their heads was actually part of normal life now.

“But they failed. In any case, the attempted hit on me alerted Tavitian that they have a mole. Yet another one. So they got the boy here faster than they had originally planned, subtleties be damned, and only a very tight group knows about this. Since they did make it here, chances are high that Tavitian managed to trust the right people.”

“What if he didn’t and the royals are only bidding their time?”

“It will soon be known where he is. It’s practically impossible for him to remain hidden for years, but killing him will be a lot more difficult out of Europe, with the Laufer taking personal care of him,” Sean paused as he took off his shirt. Nick wondered if combining those kinds of conversations with domestic things such as getting undressed for bed was an everyday thing for them, until the way Sean moved told him that, despite the neutral facial expression, the zauberbiest was in pain. He moved to help him with the shirt, and Sean allowed him to take over. “We know that Emil’s wife, Andreas’ mother, was wesen. Involved with the Council, too, which is the main reason she was killed a few years ago. Emil being killed gives the boy enough reason to hesitate to continue supporting the Laufer as his father did. From Andreas’ words, I think it’d be safe to bet that the Laufer expects me to convince him to collaborate with the cause, probably based on the wesen heritage and the whole thing being on the royals’ bad side.”

Nick snorted.

“What?”

“Nothing. It’s just… yeah, I think it’s pretty safe to say that’s what they want you to do. To recruit the boy for the Laufer. But I doubt his being part wesen and your being part wesen has anything to do with it.”

Sean gave him a questioning look.

“Come on, Sean. Going by the way he looks at you, I’m sure he’d give you his firstborn son as a sacrifice if you asked. He’d probably like to try to have said firstborn with you, if his blush is anything to go by.”

That got him a raised eyebrow.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t notice.”

“I did notice the… admiration.”

“Admiration? Crush would be a more apt word for it, I think,” Nick’s eyes landed on the less than neat bandage on Sean’s upper arm, and his brows furrowed.

The captain decided not to tell Nick that he was used to receiving that kind of attention, from people who watched him hungrily for a wide variety of reasons.

“It’s all for the better, if it will help our purpose.”

“Teenage crushes shouldn’t be abused that way,” Nick said, grabbing Sean’s arm to check the bandage. Then he started to unwrap it when he decided it was too bad and needed to be changed. “But I guess worse things could happen to him, considering the circumstances he’s living in.”

“You have no idea.”

“So tell me,” and Nick was surprised at how easy that had come out.

“I will,” Sean hissed when Nick touched the stitched wound while removing the gauze that rested against the injured flesh. “Maybe right now isn’t the best time; but I promise you I will tell you.”

Nick rested careful fingers against the wound.

“It feels warm. I hope there’s no infection.”

Sean looked at his arm.

“I don’t think it is. It’s just healing.”

The Grimm nodded, then went to grab the bag of supplies and started cleaning the wound, telling him about the case that day and how they hoped to be done with it the next day, unless the two wesen junkies decided to give them a hard time.

“Then you’re almost done with the case,” Sean said, more than asked.

“Yeah, it’d be safe to say that. If everything goes as we hope, we’re as good as done.”

“Good,” he paused, his jaw tightening a moment as Nick spread some of Rosalee’s salve on the healing wound. “I might need your focus on other things, soon.”

Sean’s skin felt too warm under his fingers, and Nick decided that he’d keep a close look on his lover’s injury, if the taller man was so ready to dismiss it. He didn’t say a word about it and gave Sean a raised brow.

“Andreas entered the country in a less than legal way… but he’ll soon be given refugee’s status, and diplomatic protection will be bestowed on him. Our department will get assigned to his protection, and I will want my best men on the task.”

“Am I counted among your best men?”

“Of course you are,” he watched as Nick finished bandaging his arm, then wrapped both arms around the detective’s body as soon as the Grimm had put the supplies down. “And that’s just your official skills… not taking into account how good you’re in the bedroom at all.”

Nick bent his neck to kiss the zauberbiest.

“We’ll try to close this case tomorrow, then.”

“You do that. You might want to bring Griffin and Wu up to speed with what’s happening. We’ll most likely need them.”

“Ok,” he combed his fingers through Sean’s short hair, then added, playfully, “anything else, Captain?”

“Yes. I’m just letting you know that I will take tomorrow off, as well.”

“More information-gathering?” Nick guessed.

“That’s right, Burkhardt. We cannot afford to be one step behind again.”

“Understood.”

Sean pulled him down into a kiss.

“Now that work’s off the way… stop worrying. I can see you’re worrying.”

Nick huffed out a little laugh. The prince did know him well. It would’ve been creepy if he didn’t trust the man so completely.

“You were shot. And the royals are more actively trying to kill you. I think I’m entitled to worry,” the Grimm said reasonably.

“I’d say I’m sorry for making you worry. But we’ve been there before… we know that’s not going to change, for as long as we live our lives as they are.”

“I know. I’m just glad you’re alright.”

They kissed again, Nick’s hands playing along the hard curves of Sean’s shoulders, chest and neck; Sean’s fingers toying with the leather of the detective’s belt, slowly closing in until his thumbs were rubbing against Nick’s manhood. The prince sighed, and then he stopped being subtle, letting his hands fully cup his lover’s groin.

Nick gasped, pushing into the contact for a moment, enjoying the heady feeling of his blood making a quick retreat south. He broke the kiss, throwing his head back to take a gulp of much needed fresh air, hands still resting on Sean’s shoulders.

“Let me try something,” he said, fingertips playing with the shortest hairs at the nape of his neck.

“What?”

“Something,” Nick said, and sank to his knees between Sean’s thighs.


	21. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20.**

 

 

Sean had made sure to try to minimize the impact of the words that had escaped his mouth at precisely the wrong moment, had tried to make light of it and soothe Nick’s stung manly pride by returning the favor the night before, but it had obviously not been enough, if the way the Grimm was now sucking on his cock, as if his life depended on it, was anything to go by.

It had sent a stab of pain through Sean’s heart to notice the lack of practice on his lover, whereas Nick as he’d been before the whole thing with the drifter, had his skills honed to perfection by over two years of practice. It wasn’t so much that he felt disappointed as much as he felt sad by the implication of that, but the fact that so many things between them were gone, most likely forever. He decided not to dwell on that and instead focus on what they could build between them from that moment onwards.

“Nick…” he let out in a broken voice, eyes stubbornly fixed on the ceiling to escape the sight of the detective between his own legs, strong hands and gorgeous mouth lavishing attention on his cock. His fingers grabbed Nick’s short hair, unable to decide if they wanted to pry him apart from his too hot flesh or not. Nick’s hand on his hip made it clear that he didn’t want to stop.

Sean took a deep breath, a lot more shaky than he’d wanted, and then pulled Nick off of him, as gently as he could while still being firm.

“What?” Nick said, in a roughened voice that sent a shiver down Sean’s spine.

“Not yet,” the prince managed. “Come here.”

Nick went to kiss him willingly, moaning into his lover’s mouth when the captain’s fingers curled around his neglected erection.

A roll, a lightning-quick pause to retrieve lube, and in no time, Sean was buried inside Nick’s body, leaning down on his right elbow to keep the strain off his injured arm.

Nick found it easy to roll with Sean, to move to accommodate his powerful frame, to wrap his legs around Sean’s body, to move with him as if they were a single entity. What felt like a long time later, but at the same time way too soon, Nick inhaled deeply, filling his lungs to their maximum… and then remembered they had someone else in the house, and barely managed to suffocate the loud exclamation that had been building in his chest, pressing his face to Sean’s neck to turn it into a low and hoarse sound.

The Grimm didn’t find it surprising that Sean apparently had no problems keeping quiet even as he climaxed, an instant later falling on top of him.

“Was it… so bad?” he asked between rough breaths.

“What?” said Sean, pulling himself off the younger man’s body and rolling to lie mostly by his side.

It took Nick almost a full minute of catching his breath to speak again.

“Was I so bad, that you needed to…?”

Sean forced himself to roll onto his side to look at his lover in the eye as he interrupted him.

“No. It wasn’t bad,” he paused. “I’m sorry about what I said last night, it was stupid and inconsiderate.”

“Doesn’t mean it wasn’t the truth.”

“It isn’t the truth, Nick. Before… well, before was damn good, but that was because we had a lot of time with each other, we had…”

“Practice?” Nick asked, sounding very unconvinced.

Sean regarded him silently for a moment.

“A great understanding of each other,” he corrected. “After a while, we knew exactly how the other would feel or react to something, to anything. It took us both a good while to learn each other so well… so I actually have a great advantage on you where our being together is concerned.”

Nick’s eyes went to the wall, and to the old paintings hanging on them, eyebrow rising in that gesture of self-doubt that Sean knew so well.

“It might take you some time to get to the point we were before… but you will. And we have time for you to catch up. Don’t we?” he gently cupped Nick’s stubbled cheek, thumb caressing the corner of his mouth.

It was the right thing to say. Nick smiled, even if not as happily as Sean would have liked.

“Yeah,” the Grimm said, finally. “We do… unless we get sloppy and the Verrat manages to take us out.”

Sean returned the grin, feeling the tension melt from them both.

“Let them try. We’ll keep sending them back to Europe in bags until they learn we’re not to be messed with,” he leaned forward to kiss the detective, feeling grateful for having Nick with him, even if things weren’t exactly the same. He didn’t think Nick, in his current situation, could fault him for being a sap, so he voiced his thoughts. “I’m just glad you’re back with me after what happened. I did fear I might never have you with me again.”

“I admit this had never crossed my mind before… but I like being exactly where I am right now,” he was glad for the pause the slow kiss granted him, giving him time to make up his mind and ask something that had been in his head for a good while. “You always make it sound like it was perfect, before.”

“I’d say it was. But it wasn’t perfect in the way most people might mean it.”

“Do elaborate?” he asked, remembering what Rosalee, Monroe and Juliette had said about his previous relationship with Sean, always describing it as sickeningly good.

“We disagreed sometimes, our tastes in some things are complete opposites, we fought… a couple of time we even got physical about things. But we always respected each other, we learned to understand and trust each other blindly, we worked hard to solve our problems before they got the better of us…” he paused, obviously choosing his words with care. “And we genuinely loved each other.”

Nick nodded, and it was a bit scary, but at the same time, it was a relief to know it hadn’t been that TV-advertising-perfect relationship, that it had its own problems and that it required a lot of work. That, he could decide to focus on and work at. It made it feel real, in a way that was achievable for the man he was now, even if he wasn’t exactly the man Sean had been loving for years now.

“I believe that, above anything else, was what made it perfect,” Sean said.

“It sounds good,” he swallowed. “I think it might take me a bit to get there, but…”

“I’ve never stopped loving you. I’ll be happy to wait for you to catch up.”

“Thank you,” and he closed the space between them before Sean could protest and say that he didn’t need to thank him.

For a good while, they just lied there next to each other, touching lightly and simply enjoying the closeness.

“I have to get up.”

Sean grabbed his cell phone from the night table to look at the time.

“Looks like you’ll be late, anyway.”

“Yeah. I’m taking advantage of the fact that my boss is off today,” he pressed another kiss to Sean’s lips, then forced himself to sit up. “But I do have a case to close.”

“Go ahead, then,” and he stayed where he was, because if he joined Nick in the shower, it was likely the detective wouldn’t make it into the precinct at all that day. Besides, he enjoyed the view as the Grimm dragged himself out of bed and into the bathroom, not bothering to cover himself at all.

Sean entered as soon as Nick vacated the bathroom, opting for a quick shower. His upper arm still hurt a bit, and the stitched wound itched some, but it was a lot better than anyone would have expected after only one day of healing.  He had to remember to thank Rosalee again for finding the recipe in the first place, and for always having the stock to make it afterwards… even if it meant she’d give him a look and remind him it would be better if the salve wasn’t needed as often as it was.

When he exited the bathroom, with only a towel around his hips, Nick was already dressed and ready, sitting on the edge of the bed and obviously waiting for him.

“Aren’t you late?” he asked a bit playfully as he selected his clothes.

Nick shrugged, even if Sean couldn’t see the gesture as he looked for his clothing in the closet.

“Like I said, my boss is off, and I don’t think anyone’s going to rat me out to him,” he paused, enjoying the view as Sean discarded the towel to start getting dressed. “Besides, chances are big our suspects aren’t in conditions to give a proper statement yet.”

“Have charges been pressed yet?”

“Yeah. As soon as we brought them in. The evidence against our guy is pretty solid, I think.”

“Good.”

Nick got up and stepped up to Sean, stopping him from putting on a light sweater.

“Let me take care of that,” he nodded towards Sean’s wound.

“I can do it later.”

“Not by yourself. Really, yesterday’s bandage was pretty bad,” he chuckled, grabbing the supplies to re-apply the salve and bandage the wound. The skin around the wound was still a bit too warm to the touch, but Nick knew that it wasn’t infected. When he was done, he looked at the time again and made a face. “I’ll have to just grab a bagel on the way.”

“Then I won’t tell you what I have in mind for breakfast.”

“You’re cruel. But I guess you deserve it, since you’re stuck here babysitting fanboy number one.”

Sean just gave him a look.

“I’m serious, that’s a textbook teenage crush,” he chuckled, and maybe he was having a bit too much fun out of that fact. Especially since he could picture the awkwardness that would fill the day as Sean was cooped up in the house with the kid. His cell chose that moment to start ringing, and he took the call. “Hank? What’s up?”

Sean finished putting on a light sweater.

“Yeah, I’m on my way. We can check it out as soon as I get there, and if we’re lucky, we’ll find him and bring him in, too… we might get all their statements today,” he started for the door, mouthing a _see you later_ at Sean as he listened to his partner on the phone. He found himself held by an arm and pulled flush against the captain’s body, and he didn’t have the presence of mind to escape or do anything else to prevent the kiss that prevented him from answering his partner. Hank’s silence on the other end was confirmation enough that the kiss had been as loud as he’d thought, and he glared at his lover for a moment, before escaping the embrace and telling the other detective that yes, he was getting out of home in that precise moment.

Sean watched him with amusement and followed him, their ways parting at the foot of the stairs, where Nick grabbed his keys and left, and the prince continued his way to the kitchen, taking his time to brew the rich coffee he preferred, and putting a breakfast together.

At mid-morning, he started to get worried, so he checked on Andreas, just to find the teenager still fast asleep. Knowing full well how exhausting running for one’s life could be, Sean left him alone.

He was starting to wonder if something wasn’t wrong with the boy when morning turned into noon and then glided into early afternoon, and just after he’d decided to check up on him again as soon as the soup was done, he heard the footsteps behind him. He half turned to see a still sleepy Andreas standing next to the kitchen island.

“Good morning… afternoon?” the boy said, right hand gripping his left elbow in a nervous gesture.

“Afternoon,” Sean confirmed with a smile.

“Oh,” the boy said, looking around him as if he couldn’t figure out what to do with himself. “I’m sorry.”

“About what?”

“Sleeping so late,” he combed his fingers through his blond hair, making it spike up in every possible direction and certainly a lot worse than it had been. Then his hand went back to his elbow.

“You were tired.”

“Still am… I think.”

“It’ll take you a while to catch up on sleep and recover from all this. I’m sure it’s been a quite eventful few days,” he paused. “Take a seat.”

“Thank you,” he said in a way that made it obvious that his brain hadn’t managed to boot all the way yet, and took a seat at the island.

“I don’t know how long it will be before you have to move again,” Sean said, choosing his words carefully. When he moved didn’t depend on him at all, most likely, but it wouldn’t do to put it in those terms, just making the boy feel like a package that had no control over his life whatsoever. “So it’d be the best for you to rest and recover as better as you can. That includes eating,” he added as he set a bowl of rich soup in front of him.

Andreas stared at the soup for a few moments. It smelled good, and it felt like it had been years since he’d been able to just sit down and eat something as simple as a soup without looking all the time over his shoulder.

“Did you make this?” he asked, not bothering to mask the pleasantly surprised tone of his voice.

“Yeah. It’s just a chicken, pork and vegetables soup. Very good to help your body recover,” he said conversationally as he set down his own bowl and took his usual place at the island.

The teenager studied the soup for a moment, then took a spoonful… and let out a badly masked sound of pure pleasure.

“It’s… very good,” he said.

Sean was proud of his cooking, since it was a skill he honestly didn’t need in his life, but something he enjoyed greatly; however, he was pretty sure this particular soup wasn’t anything extraordinary.

“I mean, very, very good.”

The prince gave him a diplomatic smile. Perhaps Nick hadn’t been that off on his estimation of Andreas’ admiration for him, which… could mean a lot of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This thing is growing into a lot of chapters and I still have a few plot points to be explored. I originally thought it was going to be 20 chapters long, and now, I honestly don't know how many chapters are still left to be written. I'm enjoying it very much, though, so I can't complain ^^  
> Thank you all for reading so far and for your kind comments. They are a great motivation to write!
> 
> Also, next week my family's coming to visit, so I might not be able to update, so sorry in advance! >.


	22. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21.**

 

 

Friday morning found Nick moving sluggishly, still mostly asleep, to chase the warmth of Sean’s body against his. When his efforts proved useless and he found himself left alone in bed, he finally came out of the fog of sleep and managed to open his eyes.

“Good morning,” said Sean’s voice from nearby, a hint of amusement in his tone.

“Morning,” he slurred out. “What time is it?” A look in the general direction of the window and the barely changing color of the sky told him he hadn’t actually overslept… it was most likely his alarm hadn’t even gone off yet.

“Too early. You can go back to sleep for a while.”

“Why are you up?”

“I need to go in to the precinct today. And there’s a few calls I need to make before that.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be on medical leave for a few more days?”

“I could, officially. But there’s too many things I need to take care of.”

“Is that it, or are you playing the tireless hero?” Nick forced himself to sit up in bed.

The Grimm’s eyes weren’t still at their one hundred percent yet, but he could’ve sworn Sean’s smile was just a tiny bit more mocking than it should be so damn early in the morning.

“There’s just a rumor going on about the possibility of an award for heroism and fast response. I will expect you to be there and exercise some very fine diplomacy if it happens,” he said, and waited for the reaction. His smile widened as he saw Nick’s expression, identical to the one he would’ve expected from his lover before things changed.

Perhaps it was the way his brain tried to escape the thankfully still theoretical scenario of a formal official ceremony and, even worse, the idea of going with Sean as… more than an officer under his command. Had they done that before?

In any case, before his brain could obsess over things, another subject came to the front of his mind.

“Wait… what about Andreas? If you’re going in today…”

“I was expecting you to watch over him.”

And that was another new thing for the Grimm. He’d heard from his friends that he was apparently completely involved in the non-official aspects of Sean’s life, just as much as the zauberbiest helped him out with Grimm business, but he wasn’t sure he could handle that as Sean would expect him to. He could only guess there was a significant amount of information he’d need if he was to be of any help at all, and although he had gotten to know Sean a lot better in the last few weeks than he had over the span of years in that other version of reality, he didn’t think he was actually up to speed on things.

“I’m not…”

“I need to be sure he’ll be safe, and there’s no one I trust as much as I trust you, Nick.”

“There’s still a few things we need to sort out with the case, and…”

“You said you’d gotten the statements yesterday, which were as good as a confession by that klaustreich, didn’t you?”

“Well, yes, but…”

“Then Hank can finish up the paperwork. One of the things I’m expecting today is to have Andreas’ presence here to become official. I’d assign you to watch over him, anyway.”

Nick nodded, realizing all traces of sleep had vaporized from his head as he lay back down and closed his eyes while Sean went to shower. Perhaps he should have a serious talk with Sean about certain things in their lives, and soon, if he was to ever stop feeling like he was a step behind or, worse, living someone else’s life. Maybe it was cowardly, but he chose not to think about it right then, even knowing he should stop postponing important things. Instead, he focused on what he was going to do with Andreas… the boy was smart, amusing with his blatant crush on Sean, skittish as a wild colt… and an undeniable reminder of Sean’s complicated life.

The heady scent of Sean’s aftershave made him inhale deeply, savoring it for a moment before opening his eyes to the very welcome sight of his royal lover naked, with his hair still slightly damp, and pausing the process of getting dressed to give him a rather serious look.

“What?” Nick asked.

“That’s exactly what I was about to ask you.”

The Grimm shook his head.

“I’m fine.”

“I would expect so,” the Captain said. “But there is definitely something in your mind.”

Nick got up, sitting on the edge of the mattress. He wasn’t going to insult them both by denying it.

“There’s too much I don’t know about you, and about your life.”

Sean looked at him for a moment, then went to sit beside him, shirt still unbuttoned.

“There’s a few things we need to sort out right now… but once we get them out of the way, we’ll take the time to fix that. I’ll answer any and every question you have.”

If there was something everyone knew about Sean Renard, it was that he was a very private person, bordering on mysterious. Finding out more about him in his old life had only meant that he knew the true depth of the secrets he hid… which went a lot deeper than he could have ever suspected. The absolute trust and openness he saw right at that moment in Sean’s green-golden eyes… was something he hadn’t done anything to earn. It was an undeserved gift. It was humbling, overwhelming, and more than a little frightening.

“Then I will answer any questions you have, too,” Nick said, even if it felt like too little to offer in return.

“I will count on that.”

Then, Nick closed the space between them, because nothing else would have felt right. He closed his eyes, relishing the sensation of Sean’s elegant fingers gripping his pillow-messed hair as his own hands went to his shoulders, not caring if he creased the pristine lilac shirt as their tongues tangled together. It was deep, and rather slow and, suddenly, something happened that made Sean’s whole body shiver and his breath catch as he broke the kiss.

The Grimm had certainly been enjoying the kiss, but he was surprised when he saw Sean’s pupils blown wide and dark with kindling arousal, his body obviously warmer. His lips parted to ask about that, but Sean’s mouth interrupted him, silencing him with a press of lips against lips.

“I’ll explain that, too,” Sean said, and Nick found he loved the way he looked like that, with his cheeks warmed in a way that wasn’t a blush, but added a special quality to his regal features. “But not right now, or we won’t accomplish anything today.”

“Ok,” he accepted, though he was more than intrigued. Before he let Sean go to finish getting dressed, he stole one more kiss; then, he unwrapped his arms from around his torso.

“I’ll go make a couple of phone calls. Then I’ll make breakfast, in case you want to join us.”

“You bet,” Nick said, and then he hurried to the shower, because there was no way he’d sit at the table with Andreas while still wearing the dried shared sweat and other things from the previous night. As he got the shower to the exact temperature he liked and stepped under the spray, he thought about the breakfast… that everyone got used to good things fast and easily was a fact of life, but the current week had made him wonder how he’d ever survived on fast food and ready-made sugary breakfasts before, when he couldn’t stop missing Sean’s cooking every day he had to rush out of the house.

Seeing how he was in no hurry, Nick took his time in the shower, enjoying the hot water and the rich steam, scented with the fine organic honey soap and the other fancy toiletries he hadn’t given a second look at before finding himself sharing a house with an old world prince.

He’d found that, while some of his clothes remained the same, some others had definitely not been his before. Some others, like the sweaters Juliette had bought for him, were naturally absent. He wondered if Sean bought clothes for him sometimes, or if he got things for Sean every now and then. Some of the things in the closet were evidently more expensive than what he usually got for himself, and as he looked at them, sitting there next to his favorite pair of old and worn out jeans and leather jacket, he wondered for the first time how exactly they shared expenses.

Seeing how he was supposed to play babysitter for the day, he chose a pair of decently broken-in jeans and a comfortable shirt, and then headed downstairs.

He was surprised to see Sean had already started making breakfast, since he’d expected his calls to take longer, but he was even more surprised to find Andreas perched on a stool nearby, watching with interest and looking ready to help.

“Good morning,” he greeted.

“Good morning,” the teenager answered after a pause, during which he looked Nick up and down in a way the detective didn’t really appreciate, before quickly smoothing his expression and returning to watch Sean.

Nick then went to help, in the little things that Sean let him help with, like washing and cutting fruit and so on. It reminded him of Juliette taking command of the kitchen and just letting him help with little things so he didn’t feel completely useless while she took care of the real cooking. He realized the thought didn’t send a spike of pain through his guts anymore, and he smiled to himself.

Breakfast was pretty simple, even as Sean explained to Andreas that he was supposed to stay with Nick the whole day. Nick had expected some resistance from the teenager, seeing how he was obviously more comfortable around Sean than around him, but apparently the boy’s crush made him agree to anything and everything that Sean said, and that –fortunately– included staying with Nick if he was told to.

“Does he always cook for you?” the teenager asked as they cleared the kitchen, after Sean had already left.

The question took Nick by surprise.

“Most of the time,” he answered lightheartedly while the detective in him tried to catalogue the strange tone in Andreas’ voice. “My culinary skills are limited to pasta and another couple of things. That, and sandwiches.”

“Hm.”

Nick finished putting the dishes into the washer and turned to look at the young Austrian.

“What?”

The boy avoided his eyes and shrugged, and Nick couldn’t help but think that, once he got over the awkwardness of his still growing body, the gesture would probably look classy as hell on him. He wondered, for the first time, what kind of couple he and Sean made. He’d always thought he and Juliette balanced each other nicely; but Sean… well, the contrast between them would certainly be there, but it was too possible that they just looked painfully mismatched instead of complimenting each other.

“It just… sounds like it should be you cooking for him. Doesn’t it?”

Nick managed not to parrot his earlier question, and instead ended up just staring at the boy, who after a moment of visibly steeling himself, turned to look at him.

“It would be fair, I think. Prince Sean obviously takes care of other things,” and the way his eyes went to the paintings in the walls, and then to the rest of the elegant and modern space made it very obvious what he meant.

If he hadn’t been thinking about the very same thing earlier, Nick would have taken offense, and most likely been able to respond to that. The way the boy’s eyes went back to rest on him, with a special brand of disdain, had Nick wondering again exactly how he and Sean fit into each other’s lives.

“We have things figured out,” Nick said, because that stingy comment needed to be answered to.

“I don’t doubt that. One just has to wonder how fair it actually is, though.”

Nick turned to look directly at him, leaning a bit on the counter he’d just cleared.

“What exactly do you mean by that?”

“Just what I am seeing. I have been here for a few days already, and it’s so obvious, it’s almost painful to watch. I am sure you are a good… _policeman_ ,” and the hesitance with the word was too artificial to be mistaken with poor command of the language. It was pure scorn in his tone, even as it was half-masked by the context. “But it doesn’t look like you do much for him. I am pretty sure you don’t even know him… and you might be a Grimm, but you are not the only one in the world, and I am sure he can get stronger and better help if he needs a pet killer.”

The kid might be taller than him and come from a wealthier background, but he was still just a brat, so Nick refused to raise to the bait. He was just taken aback by the boy’s bluntness.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he let out as calmly as he could, because he wasn’t about to admit the kid might actually be right. At least partially.

“Do you know what his favorite dessert is? Or what elementary school he attended in Switzerland? Or the kind of pet he had back in Europe?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“He likes Opera Cake, he had a border collie… and he never attended elementary school in Switzerland.”

“Knowing someone is a lot more than trivia data, you know?” he managed to say in a calm voice that made him sure Sean would’ve been proud of him.

“It’s not just about what you know or don’t know about him where those kind of facts are concerned. But you seem to have no idea of who he really is. He is Prince Sean Renard. He’s a living legend in the modern world, for more reasons than you would think about. And yet, I’ve seen you here, just playing the kept wife, and not doing a very good job of it, either,” he made a brief pause. “You’re good looking, I guess… but not extraordinarily so. I have to wonder what it is about you that makes Prince Sean keep you around. It…” he paused again, obviously searching his brain for the words, “worries me,” he finally said.

Nick wondered how he was supposed to respond to that. For one thing, he knew he shouldn’t let his feathers be ruffled by a kid, no matter how many sensitive points he was rubbing in; but on the other hand, he wasn’t sure he should let this boy, who was a guest in what was officially his house, talk to him like that.

Finally, he decided to act like he had back when the FBI had decided to investigate him, with an unexpected calmness coming over to him as he thought that, in this world, Sean had surely protected him even more fiercely than he remembered. The smile on his face was sardonic, but it didn’t feel forced as it stretched his lips.

“You might know a few things. But you clearly don’t _understand_ how this works.”

The young Austrian looked slightly uncomfortable for a moment, before shrugging again.

“I don’t pretend to know or understand everything; but some things are just obvious,” he shifted, crossing his arms over his chest. “I also don’t mean this because I think you are… not enough. I think your reputation is a lot bigger than you know. But Prince Sean is too much. For anyone.”

Nick turned to continue putting things away, feeling relieved when a good response presented itself into his mind.

“That’s for Sean to decide. Regardless of what anyone knows or believe to know about him.”

The Grimm didn’t find the silence that followed uncomfortable.

“I’ll go surf the net or something,” Andreas said after a short while. “Prince Sean said I could use his computer.”

Nick turned, opening his mouth to warn him about doing anything that might give away his location.

“I know,” the boy interrupted him. “I’ll stay away from social networks and such. I am not a complete idiot, and I do intend to stay alive, you know?”

Before Nick could say anything else, the boy had already left the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I wasn't going to make it on time, and that I wouldn't be able to update this week!  
> Work's been a nightmare as of late, leaving me with no time nor energy to do anything else that isn't work or try to sleep as much as I can (and it hasn't been anywhere near enough).
> 
> Also, I'm caught up to what I had written in advance, so now I'm going to post as I write. I promise I'll try my best to adhere to the weekly schedule, but life might interfere and not let me write as much as I'd like. My mind's been filling itself with lots of ideas for Grimm fanfiction, including various crossovers.
> 
> I hope you like what follows in this story, because now we have a Nick that has accepted his new life with Sean, but now has to figure out how things work between them. Andreas might inadvertently help xD  
> Please, let me know what you think :3


End file.
